The Dating and Relationship Group: 
The "Perfect Storm" of Modern Love and a Proposed Solution: "The Erotic Hinge" 

Perhaps more than any other time in history, romantic love relationships in modern society face a range of significant challenges and obstructions.  The persevering high rate of divorce suggests that in the context of couples' vulnerability to irresolvable conflict, poor communication dynamics, narcissistic and codependent tendencies, the hookup culture promulgated by websites and dating apps, pornography, daily life stress, and unmet expectations, finding and maintaining long-term healthy committed relationships are indeed very challenging endeavors.  In the next meeting of the "Dating and Relationship Group" on Saturday, November 19, 2016, 12:00 to 1:15 PM, I will explore the current landscape of modern love and the factors that seem to negatively impact individuals and couples the most.  Then, I will present a solution that I call "The Erotic Hinge." The Erotic Hinge is a framework that integrates various psychological and sociological theories into a paradigm that specifies the ingredients of sustainable love in heterosexual relationships.  Attendees of this group will learn the characteristics necessary from this perspective that every man and woman need to bring forth in their romantic love relationships.  How male and female partners participate in various "unhinging" behaviors and dynamics will be emphasized.

If you plan to attend the group meeting or would just like to learn about this framework, please review The Erotic Hinge presentation (it would be helpful to print out a hard copy of this presentation and bring it to the meeting on Saturday).    

The Men's Group:
Open Discussion 

In the next meeting of the "Men's Group" on Saturday, November 19, 2016, 2016, 10:45 AM to 12:00 PM,  the group will not be organized around a specific topic.  Instead,  the group will be open to whatever issue or concept or idea attendees would like to discuss. I will serve as a facilitator to help promote the discussion and offer commentary when useful.

The Buddhism and Romantic Love Group: 
The Application of Mindfulness to Romantic Conflict  

Many relationships fail due to persistent and unresolved conflict between partners.  Areas of sensitivity are often evoked, which may unleash  dramatic displays of numerous emotions including rage, anger, sadness, frustration, and resentment.  Moreover, individuals sometimes find themselves repeating certain negative patterns or roles in their love relationships, unaware of how these ongoing repetitions are maintained despite focused efforts to avoid them.  In the next meeting of the "Buddhism and Romantic Love Group" on Saturday, November 19, 2016, 9:30 to 10:45 AM, I will present  the notion of mindfulness, its origin, purpose, and processes for developing it.  I will emphasize how mindfulness  can be beneficially applied to problematic issues and dynamics so common in romantic love.  

To register for the November 19th meetings of the "Buddhism and Romantic Love Group" (9:30 to 10:45 AM), the Men's Group (10:45 AM to 12:00 PM), and/or the "Dating and Relationship Group" (12:00 to 1:15 PM): If you would like to attend any of these groups on Saturday, November 19, 2016, please RSVP ASAP to Dr. Tobin at 949-338-4388 or There is a limit of 14 attendees for this group and registrants will be accommodated on a first-come/first-serve basis.  The fee is $25.00 and the location is The Water Garden Business Center, 23421 South Pointe Drive, Suite 130, Laguna Hills, CA, 92653.  Please note that these groups are educational in purpose, not therapeutic, and do not constitute psychotherapy or counseling.
James Tobin, Ph.D., PSY 22074 | 949-338-4388 |