You Probably Have to Leave the House in the Next Week, so Avoid the Following Places:
The Following are the Top Five WORST Ways to Declare Your Love:
1. The Florida Booze Strip - Panama City, South Beach, Key West, Daytona Beach, etc., will be rife with amateur drinkers soaking their heads in hooch while chocking on their g-strings. Beware. I hear they wander into traffic, too, like drunk deer.
2. Cancun, Mexico - No no no no NO. The place is already an armpit even WITHOUT all the trashed frat boys barfing on the roof of your car at every intersection.
3. Lake Havasu, AZ - Years ago this city's officials publicly welcomed spring breakers after Ft. Lauderdale put the cabash on itself as a destination. Those officials have since had their asses caned by residents, who, I hear, still can't get the urine smell to go away.
4. Key West, FL - Pick another time to visit this awesome destination, because during Spring Break it's kinda hard to bask in all the tropical quirkiness when every square inch is covered in the crusty DNA of passed-out partiers.
5. New Orleans, LA - I love this place, but during Spring Break it's a hellpit of blotto bovines all stuck together like a giant, undulating M.C. Escher painting. Imagine scheduling a family getaway in the middle of this. You'd have to rinse your kids' eyes out with bleach.
Have a Happy Easter!
Sign up (sand save $40) for the next
Shocking Real Life
Book Writers Boot Camp Weekend
with Hollis Gillespie
May 19--20, 2012, 11-5 p.m.
Use the button below to enroll and save $40
4 spots left!
(regular price: $374. YOUR price: $334)
GIFT this class to someone you love! Enrollees will receive a gorgeous gift certificate attached to your confirmation email (if I do say so my own damn self).
Upgrade Your Brain at the Shocking Real Life Acadamy with Hollis Gillespie!
April 7 - WordPress Crash Course with Jami Howard - Learn everything you need to know to get your wordpress site off the ground, including a guided tour through the bewildering world of plugins . . . read more
April 21 - Social Media Saturday - Twittter, Facebook & LinkedIn, the social media trifecta demystified! Resident Facebook Whisperer, Jami Howard and Social Mediaologist, Dawn Gartin spend time teaching you how to best optimize your social profiles to make more money . . . read more
April 26 -Travel Writing; How to Get Paid to Travel the World - Have you taken a trip that's changed your life? Do you want to document your adventures with a paying assignment for a magazine or newspaper? This information-packed, inspiring workshop, taught by . . . Read more
April 29 - Atlanta's Most Popular Blogging Workshop - This is Atlanta's Most Popular Blogging Workshop! If you've been thinking about starting a blog or if you've already started one, this workshop will teach you how to sharpen its concept, write better posts, rank higher on Google, triple your traffic and start making money . . . Read more
April 29 - Turn Your Blog into a Profit-Making Business - Learn how to discover and leverage your blogging voice, develop killer content, effectively analyze your stats and blog traffic, increase your readership and develop loyalty and improve your "findability" on Google! Read more
May 4-5 -- Divorced Women's Funny-Ass Stand-Up Comedy Class - Ladies! Humor is healing. Whether it's been bad luck, bad decisions, or bad boyfriends, comedy is the ultimate revenge. In fact, comedy is for everyone. It doesn't matter if you work in politics, business, teaching, etc., telling a good joke will open doors in your profession, improve your social life, and heal your spirit . . . Read more
May 19-20 -- The Shocking Real-Life Book Writers Boot Camp Weekend - This is not your average writer's retreat! This is a lively, active, results-oriented symposium of creative and accomplished authors, attendees and answers to the questions that have been dogging you for years regarding how to go about getting a book deal . . . Read more
Dates Vary -- The Pitch Doctor with Hollis Gillespie -- Here's a secret, you don't need to have a finished manuscript to get a book deal. All you need is an amazing idea and as little as 10 pages. I've helped scores of writers get book deals and agent representation, you're next . . . Read more
Short on funds? Check out the PAY HALF NOW/HALF LATER page for the writers retreat on March 17--18! We will send a confirmation for the first payment and an enrollment confirmation and gift certificate upon receipt of the balance.
The Shocking Real Life [anti]Establishment for Continuing Education LOCATION!
We are now located in the historic Castleberry Artist district in Atlanta! Click HERE for directions from your location to our new space at 311 Nelson Ave., Atlanta, GA 30313!
|More about Hollis Gillespie:|
Read her Atlanta magazine column
Check out her
Shocking Real Life blog
Listen to her commentaries on NPR
Watch her appearance on The Tonight Show
(Right: Hollis after her appearance on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno)
Start the Spring Out Write!
The Shocking Real Life Writers Retreat!
May 19--20 2012
This is not your average writer's retreat!
This writing seminar is a lively, active, results-oriented symposium of creative and accomplished authors, attendees and answers to the questions that have been dogging you for years regarding how to go about getting a book deal. Graduates of this workshop have become bestsellers.
At the end of this book-writing retreat you will have a surmountable format for mapping out your book, the components you need to pitch a literary agent, including the agent contact information and the sample pages you need to send the agent. So, with that said, what's stopping you?
Sign up right now and save $40!
The Shocking Real Life Writers Retreat
May 19--20, 11--5
Reg. Price: $374,
YOUR price: $334
See below for location.
Sunday, April 29
A blogging seminar with Hollis Gillespie and Mike Alvear!
If you to turn your blog into a profit-making business, this workshop will teach you how to monetize your concept, write better posts, come up with magnetic headlines, generate more ideas, rank higher on Google, triple your traffic and start making money.
Sign up now and save $25!
Atlanta's Famous Blogging Workshop
April 29, 11--6
(reg. price $175
YOUR price $150)
*we serve mimosas and guarantee inappropriate conversation.
Congratulations to SRL alum
for landing an agent at Park Literary Group in NYC (the same agency that represents NYT Bestseller Emily Giffen) for her manuscript, All in Good Time: A Memoir About the People I No Longer Know.
"I pitched just like we discussed in your workshop!" says Stephanie. To see how she did it, CLICK HERE.