July 7th,  2013

Greetings!

  . 

I'm writing from beautiful San Diego.  My younger brother with special needs will be spending two weeks with his sister's family in sunny California. I helped make sure that he arrived there safely. What a treat for me!  

On the way to our airplane on Friday, I stopped to buy some mints, and low and behold in Massive size print was a magazine cover that was announcing "Matthew Perry  (star from Friends)  

My Life as an Addict". 

Perry says his writing about his story is to get the word out to help people that are suffering. 

" You have to want the help. 

You have to be willing to change." 

A few years ago he spoke at a 4,000 person drug-court convention.  At the convention a  young boy took the stage. He had written a statement, but was crying so hard he couldn't get it out.  The one thing he managed to say was, "Thank you, everybody, for giving my mom back to me."

Often our addictions affect those people closest to us. We don't "see it" because most of the time we think that we are hiding it well enough. Like this young boy, the addiction of his mother was not a secret from him.  It was a great heartache.  He "knew the difference" between her being well and not well... and he liked "well" a whole lot better!

Our young mother continues her story below.

Till next Sunday,

Sharon

 Please email your wisdom, comments, concerns or stories at:  [email protected] 

or

come visit my blog-site anonymously at letter to women.blogspot.com

The Continuing Story of a

Young Wife and Mother,

Written for the First Time, Especially for You. 

Substance addiction.  "Physiological dependence occurs when the body has to adjust to the substance by incorporating the substance into its "normal" functioning. 

 "I was 14 years old, living alone away from home and scared to death. 

 It was during that time that I perfected the life skills I needed to cope, to survive, to protect myself.  But my isolation and fear made me continually feel to be apart from everything, instead of being a part of anything.  I began to lie when the truth would suffice.  I cheated when I knew the answers. I began to manipulate any way that I could and took shortcuts wherever possible.  I was actively forming my negative self-image, and even the one bright spot in my life couldn't shine enough light to brighten it.

As a youth I was a nationally ranked tennis player.   But winning didn't boost my self-confidence.  Instead, a sense of entitlement and ego barged their way into my everyday life. 

I began to live and act as if rules didn't apply to me.  I lived for instant short-term gratification, not caring who I hurt or what I had to do to get it.  I felt a void, and I wanted to fill it with anything that felt good:  alcohol, destructive relationships, gambling, overspending, drugs, whatever it took.  Alcohol became my God. It  continued to fuel my resentments toward people and God after I lost my scholarship and was kicked off my tennis team for alcohol.  My life was a seemingly hopeless state of mind, body and spirit and faith was elusive.

After graduation, I began a career as a flight attendant.  For an alcoholic, it was perfect!

Traveling to far-off cities with strangers meant I could drink how I wanted, when I wanted and with whom I wanted. 

What it turned into was drinking warm mini-bottles of vodka while hiding in a dark hotel room. 

But deep down, I knew I couldn't hide from God. 

All the while I felt He was there,

waiting for me to ask Him for grace and guidance -

waiting for me to stop living in fear of what lay ahead. 

 And boy did He ever have plans for what lay ahead!

To be continued next Sunday.