There is a sense of urgency in this lesson. But this urgency is not about bringing more guilt to the mind. Jesus is speaking only about not delaying our happiness. He makes a strong plea for our release so that we can release our brothers and sisters. Our brothers and sisters are released when our minds are released because we are one holy Son of God. We have imprisoned the mind in our belief in sin and guilt which we project onto the world and now we think that the world is imprisoning us. We don't think of ourselves as the holy Son of God because we have denied our own identity, choosing instead to align with the ego mind. We think that the only holy Son is Jesus. Yet in the course, Jesus says that he is our elder brother who walked this journey that we are now taking and thus he can show us the way. He showed us by his resurrection that we are not bodies but are eternal spiritual beings. He demonstrated invulnerability which is ours as well given us in our creation. Jesus says in the course that he is no different than we are and that where he is are too as we have the same nature- being of the same God.

When we awaken from this dream, we too will realize that we have all power (9.2) and that there is nothing that we can't do.  Jesus is relying on us to escape from this hell that we have made (7.1) and with that everyone will be released with us. How can they not when it is a dream that is projected from our minds?  Now he can help us in releasing the dream. By turning to him for help rather than worshipping him, which he asks that we not do instead  we can give  him our ego thoughts which block our awareness of who we are as God's holy Son. This means taking our thoughts of shame, anger, betrayal, embarrassment, grievances, victimhood etc and releasing them to him for healing. It is these thoughts in our minds which show us a world that is chaotic; a world where we feel cast about by events we can't control; where we see evidence of our frailty and our dreams that all lead to disappointment and ultimately death. "No hope you hold but will dissolve in tears." And each breath brings us nearer to death. (2.6)

What have we done that this is world of suffering should be our experience? We have denied our reality as the Son of God. And now what we see around us is just a witness to the chaos within. So when we look at the world it reflects our denial of what we are. And thus we project our identity of who we think we are onto the world and the world reflects back our own judgments, fears, and chaotic thinking which we now see it all around us. Isn't it any wonder that in this closed system and a lifetime in a world that keeps reinforcing our ego thoughts that it is very hard to believe that we are anything but what we have come to think of ourselves as a body and certainly not a holy Son of God. But the bondage of the world can't hold us and today we declare our release.

"What have you done that this should be your world? What have you done that this is what you see?" (2.1-1). What we have done is denied our identity as given us by God. We have chosen instead the ego identity and now we see ourselves as more powerful than God. The mind is powerful and can choose to believe that it is now an individual living in the world of bodies. The only thing is, is that Jesus tells us we can choose to be unaware of what we are but we can't change the truth of who we really are. Does that thought upset you or exhilarate you? When he says that right now we see "a devastating image of yourself walking the world in terror, with the world twisting in agony because your fears have laid the mark of death upon its heart" (6.5), then it seems that the choice for the ego can only be devastating for us. But until we see that this is so,  we won't make another choice.

Jesus pleads with us to join with him in the holy instant where he is outside of this dream where the memory of who we are is found. He is in our minds and pleads with us to leave this darkness for a while so we can have some respite and recall our holiness to awareness. He asks that we rise above the world and "all the worldly thoughts that hold it prisoner". (5.1) We hold ourselves prisoner when we pursue idols of specialness that we think will bring us what we want in the dream. But he wants us to see that they bring us nothing but more despair. The ego tells us that we just don't quite yet have the right combination of events for our happiness so keep on looking. Perhaps, it tell us, a different home, a different relationship, another job, more money, will bring you what you want. But what this seeking for substitutes to make us happy does is bind us to the ego's mantra which is "seek but do not find".

So to do the healing requires that we watch our minds.  When we see the world as a classroom for our healing instead of a place to fulfill dreams that will never be fulfilled, then everything in our lives is a backdrop to expose the mind through simple honesty. Nothing that happens is good or bad. It is all material to show us what is in the mind that can be brought for healing. We look at it with Jesus who offers us his help so that we can look at our mind without condemnation. He is not a character outside of our dream but a symbol of God's love in our minds.

If I am feeling insecure, fearful, unworthy, or whatever, I need to look at these feelings without condemnation. I need to look at them without analyzing  or judging them. The thoughts I hold that lead to these feelings, are not who I am. They may take up only 1% of the mind which the ego has claimed says David Hawkins while 99% is still and quiet. But we do focus on that one percent and we think it defines us because it is this that is reinforced by the world. But it does not define who we are. All it does is distract us from the truth. The Holy Son of God Himself is the Self that is behind the part that thinks it is me living in this world. Sarah, the body and personality seemingly living in this world is not my true identity. Our experience is that we clearly can be hurt in the dream, but our true reality is outside of this dream where we are completely safe and whole.

To heal and awaken, we need to learn to look at the ego mind without fear. Any uncertainty or confusion that arises needs to be looked at in the same way. When we are looking at our thoughts in this way, we are looking with Jesus or the Holy Spirit Who holds the light of truth as we look at the darkness. It is not who we are. We don't need to seek for what is true but only for the false which is all of the thoughts we hold that block the truth. When we can look at our thoughts without fear, that is when healing can take place. And to look at our thoughts is to allow everything to be brought to awareness without telling stories about the meaning of these thoughts and emotions nor in denying or justifying them. We don't need to try to be compassionate or loving. That is the very nature of our mind. What we need to do is relinquish our investment in our thoughts that block the love and compassion. We do this by looking at them until we there is realization that  "All your past except its beauty is gone, and nothing is left but a blessing". (T.5.IV.8.2)That is the outcome of forgiveness.

This lesson describes us as  small, fragile beings who are here for a short while, assailed by the world, only to be rewarded at the end by death. It is a pretty discouraging picture of "life" and one that is what we believe we are if we deny our identity as a holy Son of God who cannot suffer. The ego needs us to believe that we are guilty, and that we are victims of this world. Of course, it-the ego- can't afford for us to see the world as bleakly as described in this lesson, so it throws in some special "love" relationships and dreams and hopes to keep us believing that there is a possibility of true happiness in the world. Then we resent the world for shattering our dreams. And we then blame ourselves or others for having kept us from the happiness that we have been seeking in the world. But it is only our denial of our true reality that has kept us in this prison. And in remembering our true Identity, we can forgive the world and everyone in it for what it did not do to us.

So by accepting who we really are we release ourselves and our brothers from the bondage of the world.  We have an immensely worthy goal here, which is to help others escape from their suffering as we awaken to our reality. How much do we want this? We become a demonstration of the choice for peace which others can then choose to make for themselves as well. And thus we offer the world mercy (9.4) so its mercy will shine on us. We can't just look at the suffering of others and say it does not matter because it is all an illusion because although this is the case, it is not our experience here until our minds are healed.

We are called to join with Jesus today. (10.4) He tells us that "your glory is the light that saves the world". He wants us to enhance our motivation in this cause as he asks us "is not your heart willing to bring your weary brothers to rest?"  (10.8) How willing are we? How important have we made this goal for ourselves? How big is our commitment to do this healing work. "There is nothing you cannot do". (9.2)

We keep ourselves in hell when we allow grievances to upset us and when we forget that we are the ones who are dreaming the dream. How small are the events that can disturb us! How insignificant are our complaints! Yet the ego hangs onto them like a dog with a bone! Take in the prayer in this lesson  "I am the holy Son of God Himself. I cannot suffer; cannot be in pain; I cannot suffer loss, nor fail to do all that salvation asks". (7.3-4) Do we believe all that? Everything is changed with that thought.  As the lesson says, so much of our time is spent in playing the game of "being helpless, pitifully tied to dissolution in a world which shows no mercy to you". Yet if I am the Son of God, then I can't suffer pain, can't experience loss and I can do all that salvation asks. Everything God is and has, I have. The only difference between us and Jesus is that he knows his power and we have denied it in ourselves. We have the same power. All of the pain and victimization we suffer is only a cloak we have put on over the truth of who we are. And when we hold those thoughts we are actually actively excluding the truth. 

  We are all called to give mercy, not to look for it in the world. Offer the world mercy and its mercy shines on you. (9.4)  And that is how we find our way out of this cycle of grievances and retaliation, control and despair with Jesus showing us that there is a way out. In fact he tells us here that hell is easily undone (7.1) We just need to truly believe one thought such as "I am as God created me" not what I have made of myself. 

All of our experiences are good, even if we seem to fall into a black hole. For me these experiences drive me further into this work and keep me motivated to heal my mind. Don't resist any of it. To resist is to say it should not be happening. But nothing is wrong. The world gives us everything we need for our awakening because our thoughts have brought it all into being. Often our greatest leaps forward spiritually are made at our most difficult times. These can offer us a certain kind of grace even if at the time the experience feels ruthless. Our greatest advances are often made when we are brought to our knees. Sometimes it seems that that is what it takes. If we see these times as opportunities for us to go deeper into our pain so we can learn about it in order to let it go, then these events in our lives truly become huge gifts. When we accept that we don't know how to do any of this anymore, the ego is unhinged and we reach a true state of humility.

We have often talked about the apparent difficulty of trying to understand the Course. Yet when we read a lesson like this, and it is the only one we need in order to be released, we see that the ego will not easily be overcome by the simplicity of this choice. We seem to need the many approaches taken by this Course  to undermine the ego thought system and help us to increase our willingness and our desire. "You who perceive yourself as weak and frail, with futile hopes and devastated dreams, born but to die, to weep and suffer pain, hear this: All power is given unto you in earth and Heaven. There is nothing that you cannot do. You play the game of death, of being helpless, pitifully tied to dissolution in a world which shows no mercy to you. Yet when you accord it mercy, will its mercy shine on you". (9.1-2)

So again, we must give that which we are looking for. We are here to bless. We are here to bring the light of our glory to everyone. And we do it through being willing to be released from our own hell. The world is waiting for each of us to find the mercy in ourselves. To give and to receive are one.  In extending kindness and mercy we are doing it to ourselves. 

Love and blessings, Sarah

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^{Chapter Seventeen:
Forgiveness and Healing}