tongue-in-cheek piece written by Bill Holman, my co-teacher in the 1990's - a time when yoga classes were rather rigidly scheduled and the role of guru sometimes misappropriated.
Thankfully, we've come a long way ...)
The path of yogic initiation is not one to be taken lightly.
The yogic techniques are powerful and one must be careful when toying with such great forces. Unless the awesome and often misunderstood power of yoga is given its due respect and transmitted by a qualified teacher,
misapplication of these teachings can result in loss of hair, loss of memory, loss of the memory of having hair, coughing, sneezing, vomiting, flatulence, divorce, pregnancy, bad breath, weight gain and melancholy. Indeed, give thanks to the guru who through the ardor and fruits of their own toil can now safely guide the student through the fraught-filled waters of danger.
Kali by MoonSpira
In general, the general classes generally tend to focus on the specifics of the basics introduced in the introductory classes, while diverting as appropriate to introduce unrelated topics from other subjects. The overall intent is to sculpt an uplifting and spirited instructional mosaic that transports the student into a state of rapturous self-communion.
While the eclectic instructional palette may at times seem divergent, circuitous, unclear, or contradictory, remember you are a guest in the class and may not question the teachings. One will make the most progress in these techniques if one will adopt an aura of child-like innocence and subservience.
Give eternal thanks for the gift of yoga, for it is rare and you are so fortunate to have its benevolent smile cast upon your face.