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Focus On A Solution

          December, 2016

Quote of the month  

"Reach for 
the sky!" 

- by Tom Hanks, American actor, comedian and filmmaker as Woody,
 in Toy Story

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I welcome the opportunity to help you work through current issues and to look at your future with a sense of hope and purpose.


Masters Degree - Applied Psychology from Seton Hall University


Post-Masters Degree-Marriage and Family Therapy from Seton Hall University


Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist


Private Practice 

since 2008


Married 28 years


Mother of 2 young adult daughters 


Passionate about 

what I do



During this holiday season many of us focus on all the issues to be resolved and how much we have to do and how we will not ever get it all done.  Sound familiar?  What if you find a way to focus on solutions during this busy time of year, you might just get more accomplished.  Read below for some tips to focus on solutions instead of just the problems.
As always, please pass along this newsletter to anyone you feel may benefit from it's content.
Maryellen Dabal, MA, LMFT
305 Miron Drive 
Southlake, TX 76092
Missed previous newsletters??
Go to www.dabalmft.com.  Click on the newsletters link at the bottom of the home page. Enjoy.....
From The Positive Perspective......

Tip #1:
Make a list of the issues at hand. What needs to get done or get resolved?  Whether there are five or fifty things to get done, this system can work.

Tip #2: Prioritize the top things to get done, but it can't be ALL of them.  Pick 2 out of 5 things to start or pick 20 out of 50.  Put the rest of the items to the side for the time being. 

Tip #3: Be sure to identify all the items in a measurable way.  For example, need to get 4 dozen cookies made for holiday parties or need to have all outfits and accessories together for 6 holiday functions. The more specific the better, then you truly know when the item is done.

Tip #4: Is there anything you can delegate to someone else you trust?  If so, be sure you choose reliable people to help and then give them a deadline for completion.  Check on progress periodically, especially in the beginning, so you are not scrambling at the last minute if someone is unable to help.

Tip #5: Take one of the priority projects and break it down into smaller projects that can be accomplished in a reasonable amount of time.  For example, wrapping all the presents for the holiday may seem overwhelming, but how about breaking that down to: wrapping presents for immediate family, wrapping presents for friends and wrapping presents to be mailed.  Each of those smaller items may not feel as overwhelming.

Tip #6: Check your list regularly and reevaluate if it is still feasible to complete.  Look at what you have accomplished.  There is nothing more overwhelming that looking at the list and feeling as though you have not completed anything. Even if you can check off one thing a day or two things in a week or two parts of a project that has 8 parts, you are making progress.  Measure progress, not just completion of a project. 

Tip #7: Take the time to acknowledge the completion of a project.  Actually relax for a little bit.  Yes, even during the holidays, you need to take time to rest.  If you have no time to rest, than you need to cut some projects out so that you can enjoy the holidays, not just get through them.

Tip #8: Remember those items that were not a priority?  At some point when you are on your way to completing priority projects, take a second look at the items you put aside.  Add a few of them to your current project list if you feel you have time to complete them or you have someone to help you with them.

Tip #9: At some point, you need to reevaluate what can actually be done as deadlines draw near.  Should I simplify a project (short note instead of a long hand-written letter to everyone)?  Make common sense choices that you can live with and make notes that will help to make things simpler next year.

Tip #10: Know that you did your best with what you had to work with.  Hopefully you have accomplished most, if not all of your projects. 

If you truly have a hard time ever finishing your projects, then there could be a medical or psychological reason for this that might need some attention.  Get a referral for a professional who may be able to further diagnose a potential medical reason for not accomplishing things in general in your life.

Here's to a wonderful holiday season for all and thank you for your support of my newsletter and its content.  Looking forward to a wonderful 2017.

Thank you for looking at all of my newsletter topics ..... From The Positive Perspective. 
Stay well.
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I welcome feedback regarding the newsletter or questions about my practice.  I can be reached at maryellen@dabalmft.com .  I cannot, however, give advice through email. For more information on my practice please visit my website: www.dabalmft.com

I wish you well...