February 3, 2015

The film adaptation of the deviantly steamy book Fifty Shades of Grey will hit theaters on Valentine's Day.

The film will assuredly be every bit as lurid and erotic as its literary counterpart, and every bit as pornographic as the content on those cable channels you wish weren't part of your package. So, what can you do? This edition of the CtC newsletter is designed to help you deal with that very question.

15 Thoughtful Tweets about #50ShadesofGrey

1. Tacit approval of violence is approval of violence. #gentlenessandselfcontrol

2. We're all sinful. Control, sex, violence, and lust APPEAL to us. You're not immune. #unvincible

3. Happiness can ONLY come by living within the paradigm God has illustrated for us. Everything else is a false, misleading dream. #baitandswitch

4. If you've read 50 Shades, you may have sinned. There's forgiveness for that. #grace

5. 50 Shades isn't introducing anything new. Abuse of sexuality and control have been part of humanity since sin entered the world. #fighttheoriginaldrug

6. Women are reading this. Men are reading this. Who's getting the most dangerous ideas from it? #victimology

7. 50 Shades of Grey has opened up a whole dialogue about sexuality and what's appropriate. You may never have the chance to reflect your Christian faith in conversations this candid again. #yolo #wastenotwantnot

8. If you don't know what happens in 50 Shades of Grey, you don't need to find out. #ignoranceisbliss

9. I don't care how hard you shelter them, your teenagers have heard of 50 Shades. Have you talked to them about it? #stopreadingthis #talktothemnow

10. There are people who are in abusive relationships just like this. Real people. #victimology

11. Pleasure is not the point of life. It's not evil, but like all things, it is best in moderation. #middlelife

12. Sex is not about control or submission. It is about love and care. #websters

13. You can tie your self-esteem to sex/intimacy/relationships, but Jesus will last longer. #yourcall

14. God has a track record of giving people who pursue shameful lust over to that lust and letting it become their god. #romans1

15. Movies and books like 50 Shades of Grey are too public for us not to talk about them. Ignoring is no longer an option. Equip yourself to speak intelligently and faithfully. #wastenotwantnot #greatcommission #greatcompassion

Do you have other challenging concepts related to #50ShadesofGrey? Share them. The conversation will make us all better.

by Kent Reeder, pastor of Illumine Church in Rock Hill, SC

FIFTY SHADES OF CONVERSATION

What will you do when your friends start talking about 50 Shades of Grey?

Here are 5 "either/ors" designed to help you learn to turn conversations about 50 Shades into conversations about godly sexuality without being an inconsiderate prude or turning people off from ever talking to you again. (Although, if you're worried about people judging you for your thoughts on sexuality, consider being more worried about the way God will judge others for their thoughts on the subject, and then do everything in your power to help people see the mistakes they're making and the way Jesus loves them and forgives them anyway.)

Think this stuff through now, and be more prepared to give an answer for the hope you have through Christ later.

1. To the question, "Have you read it?" you could say something like,

"Of course not!!! I'd rather gouge out my eyes with a hot spoon!" and completely end the conversation, cutting off any chance to have a meaningful connection with someone... OR you could say, "I haven't. There were some aspects of it that concerned me, I guess. What were your thoughts?" and start a conversation that moves your relationship with that person in a more meaningful direction by showing that you care.

2. To the opinion, "To each their own, you know. At least people are free to do what they will in their own bedrooms." you could say, "Hold on, buster. Jesus is in that bedroom. I'm pretty sure He's got some things to say about what you do in there." and get awfully personal and a little weird... OR you could say, "Actually, the pendulum has started to swing in the other direction - even society agrees that there are some things that aren't okay even in the privacy of your bedroom. Did you know that being "anti-porn" is very popular right now? #fightthenewdrug, movies like "Don Jon" and organizations like Conquerors through Christ are leading thousands of men and women away from trite, purely-pleasure-focused, false forms of sexual activity and helping them see the deeply powerful intimacy of faithfulness, selflessness, and "old-fashioned" love." Then proceed to show them the great resources Conquerors through Christ is developing at conquerorsthroughchrist.net (shameless plug.)

3. To the exclamation, "I'm going to go see 50 Shades tonight!" you could say,

"You sick heathen!!! Away from me, your indecency burns my soul!" and return to playing A Mighty Fortress on your harp... OR you could say, "I'm not sure I can go see that one. There are so many people in relationships in which they've been coerced into thinking that abuse is love. That might not be the point of 50 Shades, but it seems like an inescapable by-product of a movie like this. It's tough - where do you draw the line?" Poof, you started a valuable conversation.

4. In a conversation that celebrates the vivid sexuality of the book/movie, you could either say, "Well! (Harrumph would work, too...) I remember a time when books/movies were decent!" and whip out your VCR and a VHS of The 10 Commandments... OR you could say, "It's explicit, sure, but to what end? I mean, the Bible is sexually vivid, too, but not to profit from it. Aren't you concerned about it being a double-edged sword?"

5. In any conversation about 50 Shades, you could either stay completely silent about the whole thing and miss the chance to reflect the light God's given you to the people around you... OR you can say something. Anything. Maybe you'll fail, maybe you'll be judged a prude, maybe you'll seem un-hip, but if you speak, you'll fulfill the great commission and show God's love to people. And that's worth it, every time.

Please, don't go using all these verbatim, and don't force them into conversations. Think them through, arm yourself, and use them to promote further conversations about what's best for people's lives. Realize that you probably aren't going to convert someone to Christianity during a conversation about 50 Shades of Grey. (But if you do, please email the story to Conquerors through Christ. We'll publish it right away!) What you can do is help people take one or two steps in the right direction and show them that you care about them because Jesus does.

God bless your pending conversations - you have nothing to fear. If you have any thoughts or questions, don't hesitate to reach out to the fine folks at Conquerors through Christ.

And please, if you are fortunate enough to have one of these conversations, let us know! We'll celebrate with you.

by Kent Reeder, pastor of Illumine Church in Rock Hill, SC

Let's keep this important conversation going. Be sure to check out what's new on our facebook and twitter, and don't forget to share and retweet if you see something that moves you. You never know if one of your friends, family or followers is suffering in silence and desperate for help...and hope.

Sincerely,

Your brothers and sisters at Conquerors through Christ

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