News from the Ship
One Year Anniversary for
Jolly Roger Telephone Company!

Yesterday, May 4th 2017 was the ONE YEAR anniversary of the Jolly Roger Telephone subscription service! Between May 4th 2016 and May 5th, 2017, my robots handled 194,495 calls and wasted 3552 hours of telemarketing time. Thank you all for making that possible! We can disrupt the unsolicited telemarketing even more in the next year!

There's something that has been on my to-do list for this entire year, and that is to automate a subscription expiration reminder to all of you. Well, it's time. But I don't have that automation ready yet. So, I have added a grace period to all my early subscribers to give you time to renew. I really hope it was worth the $6 for a year of service. I know some of you now actually look forward to telemarketing calls. Who would have thought that possible a year ago? Since launching the service, I have added several ways to make it easier to engage telemarketers with bots. Please see my web page for information about automating that.

In the meantime, if you like the service and want to help me waste more telemarketer time, please renew your Deep Six subscription by purchasing another in my shop. 

I intend to send more updates (my last newsletter was six months ago!) and I have a lot to tell you! For now, please accept my sincere gratitude for using the service. Most of you know that I work on telephone systems for a living and I love telecommunications. I hate unsolicited outbound telemarketing and built these robots to waste their time. This is a labor of love and a hobby, so my apologies if I have been slow to respond to some of your notes, posts, or tweets. I love hearing from you and I love hearing any success stories or funny calls you may have received because of these bots. There's a lot more information on my website, my blog, on Facebook, or on my YouTube channel. You can also follow me on Twitter  @JollyRogerTelco.

Thank you all!

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I can automatically protect your landlines from telemarketers!
If you are like me and really want to keep your landline, you probably get lots of telemarketing calls. However, if you are using a telemarketer blocking service, Jolly Roger Telephone is better . It is called the “Landlubber” service. It utilizes a feature that you probably already have on your landline called “Simultaneous Ring”. With this service, a Jolly Roger bot will intercept the telemarketer calling your home and waste their time. If you just ignore them, hang up, or block them with a telemarketer blocking service, then it doesn’t cause them any pain. You have only blocked their machine and they’ll call again tomorrow. And the next day.  Blocking them does not stop them. Neither does the “Do Not Call” registry.  Jolly Roger bots cause the telemarketing industry lots of pain by engaging with a human telemarketer and wasting several minutes of their time. With the Landlubber service, this is completely automatic. You don’t have to do any work. Click here for details about the service and how to set it up. 
You can “Summon a Pirate”
via text message!
If you have been using the Jolly Roger Telephone Service, you may have found it can be difficult to get a telemarketer to wait for you to conference in a Jolly Roger bot. The process requires you to dial a second number and merge the two calls together. This can take a few seconds and requires a bunch of button presses.  With the “Summon a Pirate” service, all you have to do is send me a text at
while you’re talking to the telemarketer (and most people are comfortable sending texts during a phone call). Within a few seconds, a bot will call you back! All you have to do is press “answer-hold” and then “merge”. Oh, you should also press “mute” so the telemarketer cannot hear you laughing. You might want to press “speaker” so your friends, family, or office-mates can hear the conversation too. You can even “Summon a Pirate” to your landline using your mobile phone. Click here for details about this service. 
Join Jolly Roger in the Battle Against Telemarketers
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Jolly Roger Telephone Company
710 S. Myrtle Avenue,    Unit 273,    Monrovia, CA 91016