INTER-OFFICE DATA EXCHANGE BETWEEN THE HEAD EXECUTIVES AND THE OMG INSTITUTE, WINTER 2012

A: Do any of you have interest in doing a small number of OMG live events in 2012? First

off, a fest in Poland and possibly some additional shows before and/or after?

C: If it makes sense to do some other shows then great, I could probably get away with

being gone for a short week. If not then I'm fine with just doing the fest and taking

everyone's share of money. I figure I deserve it based on the amount of stress I endured

during the recording process. I need a googleplex to make this work.

S: I'll drop some knowledge on ya'll. Caleb is trying to trick us. A googleplex isn't a

number, but a wrestling maneuver. He's simply trying to make sure we'll all wrestle on

the tour. ....plus, we'll have merch to sell, and from what I understand, the Polish love

balsa wood aeroplanes.

A: Nate - just so you know, the fact that Santos drinks now means he can just come

along to entertain Caleb, and we can finally ask Kurt to play drums for us full time.

C: If we can keep our over head to a minimum then I would be on board. And of course I

will need a bowl of Wendy's french onion soup at every show. And it better be fucking hot.

A: Wendy's soup. Got it. You are a prick.

N: Danzig wanted a Wendy's chicken sandwich in addition to his piping hot french onion

soup. "No mayo, No mustard. Dry."

A: Even if we never play a show, just talking about them is reward enough for me.

N: I'm sorry if that last email came off shitty. I read it after I sent it and realized the tone

could have been misunderstood. Though I AM shitty, I promise I wasn't trying to be.

S: Hey fellas. Any progress in figuring out your schedule Caleb? Maybe I missed some

emails. I got the one where I was kicked out, so I'm just writing as a fan. Can I get on the

guestlist if you do play shows?

C: Ok, so in theory this would work for me. Drop the kids off at daycare 7am on Tuesday

the 1st. Drive to airport, fly to London. Shred hard in London Tuesday night. Make our

way to the Poland fest by shredding hard through Europe. Maybe another show after the

fest heading in the right direction? I would need to try and be home by 4pm on Monday

the 7th. You can probably throw in a trip to the emergency room somewhere in there,

mid-week or so. Again, this would be an ideal situation for me but I realize everybody

has their own shit as well. I'm just spitballin' as they say in the industry.

A: Well, Santos it looks like you might be able to play with us after all. Do you know how

to press play on a discman?...Also, anyone have an opinion about the new sequence of

the record?

N: I'm fine with this new version too, I just like it when records punch you in the face

right off the bat. Thinking about you staring at me makes me uncomfortable.

A: How about if I jump out of the record cover and punch you in the face next time you

put it on?

C: Im good with it.

N: Him punching me or the sequence?

C: Both.

N: Well, I guess we can get the punch over with this weekend.

A: Only if we listen to the record.

SELLING POINTS //////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

- Old Man Gloom is a supergroup (containing members of Converge, ISIS, Cave In,

Zozobra, Doomriders, Mamiffer, etc.), but instead of making shitty records like other

"supergroups", Old Man Gloom actually makes great ones.

- NO is an undeniably great title for an album, and also serves as an ironclad manifesto

in opposition to the moral and aesthetic decay of our global society.

- This is Old Man Gloom's fifth album, their first in eight years. They weren't on hiatus,

just busy writing the greatest album in music history. That makes them the proud

progenitors of the five greatest albums of all time, NO being number one. NO is like

"one", only spelled backwards and without the "E".

- Old Man Gloom are playing shows in 2012 and 2013, just in time for the collapse of

the global economy.

- The acronym for Old Man Gloom is "OMG". "OMG" has become a household phrase

since its introduction in to the popular lexicon in 1999, directly coinciding with the

formation of Old Man Gloom the year prior. The group has never been properly credited

for this massively important contribution to global culture.

- NO was made using acoustic and electric instruments including but not limited to:

sheet metal, toilets, human voices, guitars, drums, tambourines, shoes, hands, various

other percussive tools, analog and digital electronic devices, and brains.

You can stream a couple tracks and pre-order the album on all formats on the  OMG Bandcamp page or pre-order it with limited edition clothing in the Hydra Head Shop