Greetings Parents,
Yesterday was Halloween - Hallowed (Holy) Eve (Night Before). Today is the Holy day for which Halloween was the "Night Before the Holy Day," namely All Saints Day - a school holiday when I was a child...also a holy day of obligation - attending Mass this day is as important as attending Sunday!
My boys love to debate the "Mass outside of Sunday" requirements (
their
language -
mine
is opportunity). We can teach but we can't make anyone believe. I can give all the logical arguments that helped this author's science-oriented brain see the reason in all things Catholic. Sometimes it took some real digging to get to what "made sense," but there was always eventually a sound answer.
My children, however, are not ones to be persuaded by pure reason. The logic part of the brain isn't fully formed in us until our twenties - thus the incredibly emotional "discussions" we have with our teens. Their hearts can be all in the right places, but their reasoning subdued by emotions (leading to emotivism, where moral value are determined by what
feels
right). Considering strong emotions evoked by a situation can be a strength, if there is someone with good moral formation who they trust to guide their understanding. It was much easier when they were small and they asked, we answered, they accepted.
This could be one aspect of Jesus' statement that we must be like little children. Once we have come to trust God, we need to be like little children in trusting His Wisdom and not assuming that we know better than He does.
"I know suffering is a part of life and we can turn it to the good, but surely, God, You didn't mean this!" (Just FYI: Christ, Mary, and countless saints endured horrible, and sometimes extended suffering. God wants good for His children, but we departed from His Holy Will and earthly suffering is a natural consequence that will end when we join Him in heaven.) "Yes, I know some actions aren't good, but if someone doesn't mean anything evil by them, then they're not really hurting anyone else...are they?" (Actions can be intrinsically evil, although a person might have less "fault" in committing them, but an evil is still committed.) "I know God said keep the Sabbath holy, but, really, going every Sunday and holy day is just not always practical in today's world." (Attending Mass is for our spiritual, emotional, intellectual, and physical health, in part by strengthening our relationship with God. While we might not be aware of the "hunger pains," our entire being suffers loss when we do not attend Mass on holy days of obligation and Sundays just as our bodies, emotions, and mental state suffer when we miss earthly meals for a week.)
There are so many ways we independent, self-directed, rational Americans can talk ourselves into a Church of our own rules - I've been there and done that - and the result is always a drawing away from the true God and a drawing towards the mirror god, me. It is so hard to consider the teachings that are so opposed in our culture, "God doesn't belong in the bedroom." But only God can be present at the beginning of
every
life for there to
be
life. Anything that might bring life will always bring God. It can be a long hard road away from my mirror into God's realm, one that a part of me fights terribly, but the price is so worth the reward.
As we tell our children, anything worth having is worth working hard to get. So too is authentically living our faith. Nope, not easy. Yep, it doesn't really get easier. Sometimes the battle gets harder, but the closer we draw to God, the more we can feel the effects of the reward and the more we can yearn to attain that great goal, making the greater sacrifices easier to manage.
Hug those precious free-thinkers tight, ask all of those saints who've been where you are for help and may God bless you and your family abundantly.
-- Linda Bader, St. Thomas More