The Dating and Relationship Group:  The Residue of Past Failed Relationships
When a significant romantic relationship ends, there is not a clear consensus among relationship experts as to how the break-up is appropriately mourned or what determines if one is emotionally or psychologically "ready" for a new relationship.  Presumably one learns from the good and bad components of previous relationships and these experiences inform the selection of the next partner and the preferred dynamics and culture of this new bond.  Unfortunately, the transition to a new relationship is seldom neither clean nor unambiguous.  In my clinical practice, most persons carry with them a "residue" of their past failed relationships that consists of unresolved assumptions about oneself, others, and the nature of intimacy.  Much like plaque in the heart, this psychological residue can become thicker and harden across multiple relationships, ultimately narrowing the range of emotional possibilities and role experiences in future romantic connections. In the next meeting of the Dating and Relationship Group on Saturday, February 20, 2016, 12:00 to 1:15 PM noon, I will critique commonly-held assumptions about how one should get over break-ups and move on.  I will present a model of mourning the loss of a relationship that centers on the capacity to integrate personal limitations and the "otherness" of others.  

The Men's Group: 
" A New Psychology of Men" 
In their groundbreaking book "A New Psychology of Men," editors Ronald Levant and William Pollack portray how men have been erroneously viewed and stereotyped.  Commonly-held notions of men as aggressive, emotionally stunted, self-concerned and objectifying are deconstructed; the authors suggest that these conceptualizations of men are largely due to how boys and men have been culturally socialized.  A new approach to male psychology centers on no longer "problematizing" maleness or implying, in numerous implicit and explicit ways, that men should be more like women.  In the next meeting of the Men's Group on Saturday, February 20, 10:45 AM to 12:00 PM noon, I will describe the major themes of this new psychology of men, emphasizing how prominent scholars understand the negative impacts of patriarchy theory, misandry and gynocentrism on the modern male.  The contemporary man's capacity not to be shamed by his own masculinity but, instead, to celebrate its uniquely personalized meaning, will be discussed.  

To register for the February 20th meetings of the Men's Group and the Dating and Relationship Group:   If you would like to attend the Men's Group (10:45 AM to 12:00 PM noon) and/or the Dating and Relationship Group (12:00 to 1:15 PM) on Saturday, February 20, please RSVP ASAP to Dr. Tobin at 949-338-4388 or There is a limit of 14 attendees for each group and registrants will be accommodated on a first-come/first-serve basis.  The fee is $25.00 and the location is The Water Garden Business Center, 23421 South Pointe Drive, Suite 130, Laguna Hills, CA, 92653.  Please note that these groups are educational in purpose, not therapeutic.  
James Tobin, Ph.D., PSY 22074 | 949-338-4388 | 
Men's Group Flier: 
Dating and Relationship Group Flier: Flier
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Catalogue of Talks and 
Presentations: Summary