Volume VI, No. 8    
August 2015
  
You can't wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club.
                                                                        
                                                                               - Jack London
Leap, and the net will appear.

                                               - John Burroughs
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Included In This Issue
GET HELP WRITING YOUR SPEECH
SPEAKING TIP, VOL VI, #8 Little Words Mean A Lot
THE BEST HOW-TO BOOK ON SPEAKING!
HAVE SPEECH, WILL TRAVEL!
FOOD FOR THOUGHT
A BETTER SPEAKER = A BETTER LEADER!
MORE ABOUT MARION CLAIRE, Revealing An Embarrassing Secret
Why is it called Speaking is Sexy? 

When what someone says and how they say it sends chills up and down your spine, that's sexy! 
 
Whether you're giving a speech, having a conversation, saying your wedding vows, teaching your kids, exhorting your sales team, or talking in your sleep, if someone is listening, you are inspiring them.  It's important to remember that whenever you speak, someone is influenced by each word you say. 
 
Be a positive influence. Be an inspiration. That's very sexy.
 

Did you miss a previous Speaking Tip?

You can find them here!
 
If you are...
  • Currently speaking in public,
  • Thinking of speaking in public, but procrastinating like crazy,
  • Afraid to speak in public,
  • Envious of people who speak confidently in public, or
  • Would just like a few tips on how you can speak better than they do...
This newsletter will give you tips and techniques to become the accomplished speaker you've always longed to be.

MARION CLAIRE coaches solopreneurs, business owners, middle managers and executives who want to be confident, unique and sexy speakers who influence and inspire others with the power of their voice.
www.speakingissexy.com

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"After working with Marion Claire, my fear of speaking in front of a group of people is practically gone.  I still get a few pre-speech butterflies, which Marion assures me are totally normal, but my former severe anxiety has disappeared.  Marion taught me simple techniques to release my pre-speech tension and build up my confidence.  Her knowledge and easy-going manner make her very easy to work with.  She's the real deal and I'm happy to recommend her."
~ David Feldman, CPA, david@feldover.com

GET HELP WRITING YOUR SPEECH!  

  

"Wow!  I am totally blown away, Marion!  Thank you!  Hope to use your services again soon."
~ Victoria Ferro, CEO, MicroKey Solutions, Inc.

     Do you need to create a 30-60 second Intro that highlights your brand, your talent and your experience, and will draw lots of new potential clients? Need a wedding toast, bar/bat mitzvah speech, birthday, retirement or memorial speech? Not sure what to say or too overwhelmed to do it yourself?  We'll create your speech together, face to face or over the phone, and you'll have the right words just when you need them.  Why struggle on your own? Contact me at speakingissexy@aol.com or call 310/659-8956 and get it done fast.


"Words just cannot express just how happy I am with the professional speech writing services I received from Marion Claire. My experience was very positive mostly due to the fact that she spent quality time with me to understand exactly what I needed to say and the audience I needed to say it to. I will absolutely use her services again and highly recommend her to others as well."

~ T.F., Paralegal Manager

Need help with your speech? CALL MARION!

 
Speaking is Sexy Tip Vol. VI, #8

LITTLE WORDS MEAN A LOT
      
       When you hear a new speaker, someone you've never heard before, what is it about the way he presents that makes you feel he's someone you're going to like?  

       You respond immediately to what he has to say, you like the way he says it, and you settle in comfortably to absorb the gift he's giving you.

       But sometimes you don't feel that way.  Sometimes you can't concentrate on what's being said, your attention wanders, you squirm in your chair, look at your watch, and start thinking about what you'll have for lunch. What is it that turns you off? Are you just not in the mood to listen?  Or is there something the speaker is actually doing that makes it difficult or impossible for you to keep your attention focused on receiving his message?

       It's probably not your fault. More likely, and especially with speakers new at the game, they might be falling into a number of unconscious bad habits that all speakers are prey to. Notice that these are unconscious habits... things we do or say in everyday speech that, when talking to friends, family, colleagues or salespeople, we might use all the time with no problem. But when we speak in front of a group who are depending on us to tell them something they didn't know before, we have to be aware of the effect of every word we say.

       Here's a major unconscious habit that is easy to correct once we're aware of it.

"Thinking 'uhs or ums'"

       A speaker comes to the end of a sentence, then tacks on an "uh" before beginning the next sentence.  Maybe there's an "um" when she pauses in the middle of a sentence and then completes the thought.  When moving from one point to another, many speakers say "and... uh..." as transition words.  The 'ums and uhs' start at the beginning of the speech and continue on until the end.  If you counted, you'd find dozens in a 20 minute speech. 

       What's irritating and distracting about these "uhs and ums" is that it sounds like the speaker has forgotten what she wants to say, or can't remember what to say next, or has an extremely limited vocabulary.  Hearing an "um" at the end of every sentence is annoying!  The audience will begin to focus on them instead of the meat of the speech and tune out the information you really want them to get.  

       Other similar 'thinking words' that we need to avoid are:  "and", "y'know," "right?", "y'see," "yeah" and "okay." You've probably heard others.  They're all little words that we use when we need time to think about what to say next. "Y'know" is a particularly insidious one because often we really aren't aware we're using it, or if we are, we think we're asking the audience if they got what we just said. We're not. It's a thinking device.

       What to do instead?  Keep quiet!  Don't say anything!  When you come to the end of a sentence, pause for a moment in silence.  Take a deep breath.  In that moment, while you're breathing, you can decide what comes next. Silence is a great tool.  It benefits both you and the audience.  They get to absorb what you just said, while you think of your next thought, your next point, or your next move. When we're in the middle of a speech, for some reason we feel the need to keep talking, even if we're not quite sure what to say next.  So we use all these little thinking devices, "and... um... uh... y'know... right... y'see... okay... yeah."   

       Use the silence.  The audience will wait for you.  As a matter of fact, they'll be grateful for a quiet moment to think about the information you've just given them.  It's a little thing, but it means a lot.
"I met with Marion Claire for training in speaking in front of an audience during a book tour. Marion is intelligent and affable. She helped me re-write my "pitch," and worked with me on its delivery. My presentation was all the better because of her attention to detail and the genial manner in which she delivered her critiques. I hate to think of the talk I would have given without her help." 
                              ~ Bill Aron, Photographer, Author
Want to use this Speaking Is Sexy Tip in your Newsletter or Blog?  

You can, as long as you include this entire blurb:
 

Marion Claire coaches entrepreneurs, executives, and professionals of all kinds to become the confident public speakers they long to be. An autographed copy of her book, SECRETS of a UNIQUE & SEXY SPEAKER, is available on her website. She'll customize a Speech or Workshop for your organization and help you write your speech for almost any occasion.  

For more information go to: www.speakingissexy.com 

THE BEST HOW-TO BOOK ON SPEAKING!   

      
Okay, that's my opinion, but in all honesty, others tell me they feel the same way. If you already have a copy, and have read and liked it, please go over to Amazon.com and say so! The more likes and positive reviews folks see on Amazon, the more it'll help spread the word. 
http://bit.ly/speakingissexy 
Many thanks! 

    
SECRETS OF A UNIQUE & SEXY SPEAKER 155 Helpful Speaking Tips for Writing Your Speech, Facing the Audience & Overcoming Fear! is full of speaking tips used by experts. It's for speakers of all levels, from first-timers to 'been there, done that'. An autographed copy is waiting for you at  www.marionclaire.com. Or pick it up without the autograph at www.BalboaPress.com, www.Amazon.com and www.BarnesandNoble.com.
     

~~~~~~~~~~~~   

  

"I have a whole new mindset about getting up to speak after reading Marion's book.  I was quite nervous before, but she showed me another way of looking at the audience which made me feel more confident.  And I liked the way the Speaking Tips reinforce the advice in every chapter.  It's a terrific book and it really helped me." 

~ Larry Freedman, Dynamic Nursing Service


DO YOU HAVE FRIENDS OR COLLEAGUES who would benefit from seeing this Speaking Is Sexy eZine?

Please forward it to them or send me their email address and I'll send them a copy and tell them it's from you!  www.speakingissexy.com  

Did you miss previous Speaking Tips?  

Have Speech, Will Travel!

 

 

 "Your talk was smashing!  Thank you so much for taking the time to share your expertise with our NAWBO-LA membership.  We truly appreciate it!"

  ~Mina Trujillo, PR & Marketing Specialist

 

      Do you want a value-laden talk or Workshop designed specifically for you and your organization? Let me show you the secrets professional speakers use, including techniques to overcome pre-speech jitters, grab the audience's attention, and keep them focused on your message. Choose 30 minutes, an hour, two hours or more in your choice of formats. Contact me at: speakingissexy@aol.com or call 310/659-8956 for help to solve your speaking needs.
 

"Marion, your presentation (on the 30-60 second Intro) today was excellent!  I definitely have take-aways from it, especially your suggestion that we 'provide a solution to an emotional problem people have'.  That's a nice twist on the difficulty of doing a good elevator speech!  Thank you very much for your expertise."

~ Ivy B. Rappaport, LTC & Life Insurance Specialist. 

 

Looking for a terrific Speaker/Workshop?
CALL MARION!

Food for Thought
 
Happiness is as a  butterfly which, when pursued, is always beyond our grasp, but which if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you.  .
 
      ~ Nathaniel Hawthorne
 
A BETTER SPEAKER = A BETTER LEADER!
 

 

"Public Speaking was terrifying to me AND necessary to my business.  Within a short time of working with Marion, my fears subsided and my confidence grew.  With her program and knowledge, I am able to speak publicly for the first time.  She gave me the tools necessary to make this painless and even FUN!  I learned a lot and feel so much better about myself in general.  Thank you so much, Marion." 

 

    ~ Jennie S. Crowley, Chef Eric's Culinary Classroom

 

  

     If you're running your own business or leading a team in a large or small company and the thought of giving a speech paralyzes you, it's time to change your thinking! A Coach will help you become a better leader by becoming a better speaker. Learn to streamline your ideas, create a solid presentation, and increase your ability to look and sound professional. Quickly learn the tips and techniques you need to make you both a better speaker and a better leader!

 

All inquiries are confidential. Call for a *free* half-hour consultation at 310/659-8956 or email me at speakingissexy@aol.com.


Need a speaker's coach? CALL MARION!

 
More about Marion Claire

 

Revealing An Embarrassing Secret

       
      We all have an embarrassing secret that we don't want to reveal because we're afraid people will think less of us if we do so. For many, many years I hid mine. I was sure that people would look at me strangely or not want to be around me if they knew I was less than perfect. Boy, was I wrong!

      The thing about hiding the truth about yourself is that you are depriving yourself and the folks you come in contact with of the opportunity to have an honest relationship with you. True, you don't want to just blurt out your deepest feelings or most painful memories at inappropriate moments. But it is far better to be open about the things you cannot change that have shaped who you are. Facing the secrets of the past helps you understand yourself and it helps others understand you. And with understanding come the gifts of appreciation, sympathy, empathy, and love.

      So here's the embarrassing secret I used to be afraid to reveal.

      For over 20 years, I suffered from agoraphobia, the fear of crossing open spaces. Sometimes I couldn't leave my house for more than five minutes, without scurrying back inside. My enemy was not the great outdoors. It was simply fear.

      Everyone experiences fear on occasion. And everyone's fear is a little bit different, personal to the individual. Mine was fear of being alone out in the world. I didn't feel safe by myself. Although I was perfectly content to live on my own, I needed the comfort and companionship of someone I knew well whenever I ventured out of the safety of my home. No way could I dream of getting up to speak in front of a room full of strangers!

      I'm so proud to say that I overcame my fear. It took, first of all, the courage to admit there was something wrong. Then came the desire to fix it and to seek out the help I needed to overcome it.

      And wow! Look at me now!

      Today I speak in front of groups of all sizes, shapes and interests.  If I can do it, so can you!  Let me help you. Contact me at speakinginsexy@aol.com.  

Speak Your Mind with Marion Claire

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