The way that we find God's peace and return home is always through forgiveness. Forgiveness is as close as we will ever get to love in this world. It reflects the love of God as blocks to love are released. "Forgiveness looks on sinlessness alone, and judges not." (W.352.1.1) It is the way home to ourselves as we were created. It requires surrender of our "I know" mind. It requires letting go of opinions, judgments, and expectations of how things should be. Why is this so difficult for us? Why are we so defended against the peace that comes only through forgiving our way of seeing? We seem to have difficulty allowing in God's Love. We fear our own Identity and so we defend against the love that we are and instead listen to our own voice. When we reach the quiet place within and connect with the deep peace where the memory of God is in our right minds, we find it difficult to sustain for very long. In no time the mind gets filled with beliefs, fears, agendas and opinions. When this happens, it is because we are threatened by the peace that is in us that we run to our thoughts and concepts, believing that we are safe there. We believe we are safe from the Love that we fear will overwhelm what we have made of ourselves and what we still value.
 
The opposite of forgiveness is judgment. It is when we choose to see our brother guilty, which is another way that we defend against the love. From judgment comes all of our pain and sorrow. If we truly believed that this was the case, we would not be so invested in seeing our brother as guilty. We would see that it is only our judgments that bring all of our distress. As long as we are seeing sin in the world, it is a projection of the guilt within our own minds. We need to ask for help to bring this guilt to light because our own fear will keep us bound to the guilt. It is wonderful to have opportunities to see the fear and guilt that is in our minds reflected back at us. It is wonderful because it is the only way that we come to know what is in the unconscious mind.

I was watching a movie about Tolstoy's life. It is called "The Last Station." I watched my judgments about the relationship that Tolstoy had with his wife. Both seemed to be caught in a trap of the ego, which I recognized so well in many of my previous relationships. From the perspective of the two characters, there was no way out of the dilemma. Both were caught in their own perceptions of the situation until Tolstoy saw no way out on behalf of his own peace except to leave the woman who was the love of his life. That is what made it so sad. As I reflected on it, I saw that the only answer was acceptance. The only answer was that  "Whoever is saner at the time the threat is perceived should remember how deep is his indebtedness to the other and how much gratitude is due him, and be glad that he can pay his debt by bringing happiness to both." (T.18.V.7.1)(ACIM OE T.18.VI.47) From the perspective of the ego, it means that one must lose. Yet there is no loss in salvation. There can only be loss in the world. Only when Tolstoy was dying was his wife able to surrender everything in order to join with him. It was only then that she truly saw what was valuable and was able to come to her senses. Sometimes we find in our own lives that we will only do the same when we are pushed against the wall. Jesus urges us not to wait, as our happiness is available now. "Why wait to find it in the future, or believe it has been lost already, or was never there?" (W.PI.188.2.2)
  
We are so invested in the image we have made of ourselves, which keeps us tied to our individual separate identity. We don't want to lose what we still regard as valuable, which is our body, our concept of ourselves and the world that we still value. We still cherish this separate self. We hold onto our concepts and beliefs very tightly until we see that they no longer serve us and we call out to the Holy Spirit for help to see another way. While there is still fear of losing ourselves, there is also the pain of holding on. When the pain is sufficient, we are more willing to let go. When we see that our way only brings us unhappiness, we will elect to follow more and more in His way. The memory of God's Love is in our minds. It is calling to us as loudly as we choose to hear. "Father, I would hear Your Voice and find Your peace today. For I would love my own Identity, and find in It the memory of You." (W.352.1.8-9)
 
To know the love that we are is a goal that we say that we want. Yet it will only be achieved through surrender. It is not achievable when we hold onto our judgments, our ideas of how things should be, and concepts and beliefs about ourselves or any brother as being unworthy of love. When we are not approving of someone, judging or condemning them, seeing ourselves as superior, it is a judgment we have first made about ourselves and now project on our brother. It keeps us from experiencing the love that we are. We need to be as honest as we can in bringing awareness to our judgments. We do so by being vigilant in watching our thoughts and in taking our projections back to the mind, and giving them over for healing. Thus love is given an opening to come shining forth. It is already there but hidden by the clouds of our judgments. It shines forth when we give up these judgments. This does not mean that we have to be in the same room with those who we still have difficulties with. It only means that we work on giving up the judgments that we are holding in our minds.

Don and I had a beautiful lesson in this recently when we were having a disagreement. We parted in anger, choosing to keep our judgments rather than offer forgiveness. In the quiet of our own minds, we both resolved to take some quiet time within and ask for help to release the judgments. We no longer felt the need to resolve the problem in form because the "problem" no longer had any substance. As Don said in a moment of sanity, our relationship was more important to him than any problem. I reminded myself that nothing outside of my mind was the cause of my loss of peace. If I did not have peace in this situation, it was only because I had thrown it away and blamed him for having taken it. And that is the shift that allows us to stop figuring things out, blaming our brother for our lack of peace, or trying to resolve the conflict. Instead, we can simply allow our mistaken perceptions to be changed and let peace be restored for us. Without the Course, disagreements like this build and build, love seems to turn to hate, until there is a desire to part. Yet with this teaching we can truly see these issues as bringing us opportunities for healing our minds. Thus, we can ultimately be grateful for this classroom in which what we need to heal shows up perfectly in our relationships and the events in our lives.

Rather than how other people impact us, the focus here is how we impact others. Jesus speaks to this in Chapter 7.VII., where he says that when a brother behaves insanely our normal response is anger, outrage, retaliation, or strategizing what we can do to try to change or fix them. Jesus says that we could instead see them as offering us something positive, namely an opportunity to bless them. This then becomes a gift to ourselves. This message is given us again and again. Jesus tells us that a brother's insane behavior is really a call for help. "When a brother behaves insanely, you can heal him only by perceiving the sanity in him." (T.9.III.5.1)(ACIM OE T.9.II.5) "A shadow figure who attacks [someone who is perceived as attacking us and who reflects someone from the past who attacked us] becomes a brother giving you a chance to help, if this becomes the function of the dream." (T.29.IV.5.6)(ACIM OE T.29.V.29) "His need is yours." (T.7.VII.2.2)(ACIM OE T.7.VIII.72) What is his need? It is to be seen as innocent and blessed. We need the same thing too, and the only way we can have it is by giving it to him. This is the "Law of God," later called the "Law of Love": "Today I learn the law of love, that what I give my brother is my gift to me." (W.P.II.344). In truth, we already have that blessing. God gave us that in our creation, but by refusing to give a blessing to our brother, we won't know that we ourselves have been eternally blessed.
 
Jesus tells us that we are responsible for everything that seems to happen to us and choose the feelings that we experience. "I am responsible for what I see. I choose the feelings I experience, and I decide upon the goal I would achieve. And everything that seems to happen to me I ask for, and receive as I have asked." (T.21.II.2.3-5)(ACIM OE T.21.III.15) It is our script that we have written and all of the characters in that script are perfect for our awakening. Each one shows us something of what is in our own minds. We are not victims of the world we see. It is all our dream that we are dreaming while safe at home in Heaven.

We believe that we need to judge as self-protection. It is the way we survive in the world. It keeps us on the defense against potential attacks, even from those that we believe we love. It keeps up our armor. It keeps us separate. We think we are protecting ourselves from being hurt. The ego does not want us to see that, instead, we are actually hurting ourselves by keeping ourselves in a state of fear. Where fear abides, there can be no love. Yet the love, which is behind the fear, calls to us and it is this call that we have responded to when we took up this path.

Today we remind ourselves once again that we need not listen to the ego programming any longer. We have the memory of God in our minds. The Holy Spirit is in our minds and is waiting to lead us back to the memory of who we are. He will help us to rediscover the truth of who we are as we give up our judgments.

Jesus is now reminding us that "Our use for words is almost over now." (W.PII.Q14.2.1) We are increasingly following the Guidance within. We are reminded that "I am the holy home of God Himself. I am the Heaven where His Love resides." (W.PII.Q14.1.4-5)  God is not outside of our own minds. God is not, as Bette Midler says in her song, at a distance watching me. He is in my mind. We can only know this by giving up our judgments (our fear). We can't keep the judgments and know that we are love. The only way to get in touch with our own divinity, innocence and holiness is through forgiveness. This is how we remember God. This is how we connect with our true Identity.

"The truth of what we are is not for words to speak of nor describe. Yet we can realize our function here, and words can speak of this and teach it, too, if we exemplify the words in us." (W.P.II.Q14.2.4-5) It is time to put the metaphysical discussions aside. The metaphysical teaching has only been there to motivate us to forgive and to live the Word by demonstrating, and exemplifying the teaching. Ceaseless discussions and arguments about the truth will not accomplish our unfolding in the truth of our Being. God will be revealed through us as we simply continue to allow. Our goal is to become happy children, unfolding, as we are being carried in the flow of love and inspiration. Every moment can be seen as more of love being revealed. Nothing ends. All that happens is that we feel lighter and lighter as we go about our day. "My burden is Light and my yoke is easy." Let your busy doings today be guided, be light, unfold easily and happily.