August 2025 Staying In Touch Newsletter

The Staying Put office will be closed on Friday, Aug. 29th and Monday, Sept. 1 for Labor Day!

August at a Glance

Wed., Aug. 6, 10am: Ladies' Coffee at Staying Put

Tues., Aug. 12, 2pm: Bingo and Ice Cream

Wed., Aug 13, 11am: Silvermine Art Museum /Lunch at Silvermine Market

Thurs., Aug. 14, 10am: Men's Coffee with Scott Hobbs

Fri., Aug. 1, 8 and 22, 10am: Walk with Kate at Irwin (No Walk on 15th)

Tues., Aug. 19, 5:30pm: Woodway Beach Club BBQ (Rain date: Aug. 20)

Thurs., Aug. 21, 12pm: Pizza Lunch and "Name That Tune"

Tues., Aug. 26, 12pm: Chat and Chew Crew - Lunch at Coromandel

Wed., Aug. 27, 10am: Men's Coffee at Staying Put

Welcome to Our New Member

Janet D'Arcangelo

MEMBER EVENTS

Please call the office at 203-966-7762 to RSVP for all events. If an event changes or is canceled, we will be able to contact you!

Wed., Aug 6, 10am: Ladies' Coffee at Staying Put. Join Staying Put friends for coffee, treats and good conversation. Free. RSVP by Tues., Aug. 5th.

Tues., Aug. 12, 2pm: Bingo and Ice Cream at Staying Put. Let's play a friendly game of Bingo while enjoying refreshing ice cream. It's a great way to beat the summer heat with your friends. Free. RSVP by Mon., Aug. 11th.

Wed., Aug 13, 11am: Silvermine Art Museum/Lunch at the Silvermine Market. We will visit the Guild Summer Salon, featuring artwork by the Silvermine Guild of Artists. Lunch following at the Silvermine Market. Museum is Free. Cash or Credit Card for Lunch. RSVP by Tues., Aug. 5th.

Thurs., Aug. 14, 10am: Men's Coffee with Scott Hobbs. Join the Staying Put guys for coffee, treats, and engaging conversation with Scott Hobbs, the multi-talented President and Owner of the construction company, Hobbs, Inc. and well-know Gridiron thespian. Free. RSVP by Wed., Aug. 13th.

Fri., Aug. 1, 8 and 22, 10am: Walk with Kate at Irwin Park. Come enjoy a lovely walk with Kate, weather permitting. Please meet in the lower parking lot at Irwin Park and don't forget your sneakers and water bottle. Note - this is for those who are active, with no mobility issues. Note - Kate is out on Aug. 15! Free. RSVP by Thursday prior.

Tues., Aug. 19, 5:30pm: Waveny Beach Club BBQ and Potluck. An event not to be missed, there will be hot dogs and hamburgers with all the fixins. We welcome a contribution to our potluck: appetizer, salad or dessert. Call us at 203-966-7762 to RSVP and let us know what you'd like to bring. Free. RSVP by Thurs., Aug. 14th. Raindate: Wed., Aug. 20th.

Thurs., Aug. 21, 12pm: Pizza and "Name That Tune" at Staying Put. Enjoy a pizza lunch and have fun naming the title and artist of some "oldies but goodies". If you enjoy music, this is for you! Free. RSVP by Tues., Aug. 19th.

Tues., Aug. 26, 12pm: Chat and Chew Crew - Lunch at Coromandel. Dine out with Staying Put friends at a favorite Indian restaurant located in Darien. We'll carpool from Staying Put. $22 per person, RSVP by Mon., Aug. 25th.

Wed., Aug. 27, 10am: Men's Coffee at Staying Put. Join friends for conversation on topics of your choice. Coffee, tea and treats as well! Free. RSVP by Tues., Aug. 26th.

August Birthdays

Jim Bach, Angie Brenninkmeyer, Anne Brownley, Sherm Bull, Rodney Chabot, Lyn Chivvis, Joanne Crane, Tom DeMartino, Molly DePatie, Frances Edwards, Mike Farrell, Mary Feloney, Gill Foster, Ellen Gaw, Nancy GIlbert, Josefina Lopez, Winky Lowry, Peter Muller, Maureen Munro, Ceci Murray, Paul Stein, Ensaf Thune, Dan Ward, Bob Widen

The Book Talk and Lunch Group meets every 6 weeks. Next meeting is on September 17th, 12-2pm. All are welcome.

"The River is Waiting" by Wally Lamb

Recommended by the Book Talk and Lunch Group

From the New York Times bestselling author comes this heart-wrenching, moving novel about a young father grappling with a terrible family tragedy he has caused. Sentenced to prison for three years he travels from the depths of despair to the healing power of forgiveness, resilience and growth. Now in the Staying Put Library!

Tech Support Scams are Rampant - Beware!

Several Staying Put members have recently experienced this scam attempt:

A pop-up screen suddenly appears on your computer screen while you are searching the internet. The screen announces that your computer IP address has been compromised and a loud voice warns through your speakers, “Do not turn off your computer! Call this number for Tech Support." If you call the number, you find yourself talking to someone who claims to be tech support staff from Microsoft or Apple. Once they have your phone number, they are able to find out information about you that they will use to convince you they are legitimate (address, banking info, email account, etc.). Once they have you hooked, they will try to convince you to download software that will give them access to your computer and its data.

If you see this or a similar screen pop up on your computer, please do not call the phone number! Shut down the scam or call Staying Put at 203-966-7762 for assistance.

Hello from Kate

I am fond of the Well section of The New York Times. The section dissects everything from the latest trendy nighttime mocktail, to more thought-provoking columns. The one excerpted below struck a chord with me on behalf of myself as a partner, mother, daughter, sister and on behalf of my friends and our members.

A person who is aware of their cognitive decline seeks advice on how to navigate the relationship with their partner who responds unsympathetically at times. While this article is specifically focused on a married couple, I found it true of any loving relationship. We likely have been or could be one of the two in this situation. The advice offered is both honest and tender to both sides.

Lori Gottlieb for The New York Times, 17 July 2025, responding to the writer who is facing memory loss:

It’s not wrong to ask to be treated more gently, especially because losing your memory can be scary and disorienting. It brings with it a heightened sense of vulnerability, and you want the person beside you to hold you with tenderness. But you’re likely to get a better response if you understand what’s happening beneath the surface...When the issue involves cognitive decline, the relationship faces a distinct kind of strain — one that threatens its identity.

Think of memory as a couple’s shared emotional archive, a unique compendium of stories and experiences written together over time. When one person’s memory begins to falter, both partners can feel especially scared and alone, each mourning the gradual erosion of the essential “us” of their relationship…But this can be complicated. While a part of your partner wants to stay connected, another might be trying to protect himself by keeping emotional distance. You experience this as a lack of warmth or empathy, but for him, each memory lapse is a reminder of what you’re both losing.

As you grapple with what it’s like to forget, try to imagine what it’s like to be the partner who remembers. Some describe it as “grief in slow motion” — a mourning not just for what’s happening now, but for what lies ahead. Maybe your husband feels helpless, silently worrying about the future. What is it like for him to watch not only you, but parts of your relationship begin to fade — and to face the possibility of becoming the sole memory-keeper?

Try letting your shared vulnerability draw you closer…Ask: what do you each need to feel supported now and in the future; what wishes you have if a higher level of care is needed one day; how you can plan for this financially; and how to reduce burnout, guilt and resentment. Talk about how to make space for honesty on both sides and what will help each of you feel less alone and more connected. You can share how you’d want to be spoken to, what you wish to preserve, and what care means to you — medically, but also emotionally.

Creating space for this kind of honesty isn’t easy, but it can lead to the deepest possible intimacy. It’s an exquisite act of love to say: If I need help someday, I want you to have permission to get it — you don’t have to do it all alone. And he might find relief in saying: I feel helpless when you forget. I’m afraid of losing you slowly. I didn’t know how to talk about it, so I’ve focused on the facts instead of my feelings.

These conversations won’t take away the challenges of memory loss, but they can change how you both view it — from a source of isolation to an opportunity to learn how to hold each other close.

Community News and Events

QUESTIONS? For more information, see the Town of New Canaan July newsletter, or Contact Town of New Canaan Parking Manager Stacy Miltenberg at stacy.miltenberg@newcanaanct.gov or 203-594-3040.

Shop Smarter With Consumer Reports

New Canaan Library

Wed., Aug. 6, 1-2pm

This class will show you how to use Consumer Reports to take your shopping skills to the next level. You’ll learn how to access the database from anywhere, browse reviews, compare products, read informative articles, find helpful guides for major purchasing decisions, and more.

To register: Call 203-594- 5000 or use link - New Canaan Library

Open Tech

New Canaan Library

Tues., Aug. 5, 12, 19, 26, 2-4pm

If you need help with email, smartphones/tablets, social media, or accessing the digital library, stop by for one-on-one support from a tech librarian.

Drop In - First Come, First Serve

Guild Summer Salon

Silvermine Art Gallery

July 19 - August 21

The annual Summer Salon features new work by the Silvermine Guild of Artists working in a broad range of styles and the artists explorations within their medium.

Free

Lapham Center Programs

Call 203-594-3620 for more information and to RSVP

Mon., Aug. 4, 10am: Fit for Life with Mike. This class focuses on upper, lower, and core muscle strength while emphasizing posture and balance. Free.

Weds., Aug. 6, 13, 20, 27, 12:30pm: Blood Sugar & Blood Pressure Clinics. Ellen Samai, RN, from New Canaan’s Department of Health provides in-person blood sugar and blood pressure testing. Walk-ins welcome. Free.

Thurs., Aug. 7, By Appt: Medicare Counseling. Dick Neville, a CHOICES certified Medicare counselor, provides free, objective, person-centered assistance so Medicare beneficiaries can make informed choices about their Medicare options and related benefits. By appointment only. Free.

Staying Put in New Canaan Services and Staff

Our Team is Here for You

We provide New Canaan seniors with a wide range of practical services and social connections - from rides to helping with errands, minor home repairs and technology, to brightening the day with a call or visit - all making it easier for seniors to live confidently at home and stay engaged in the community.

Help is a Phone Call Away: Caring professionals to turn to for help, information, referrals, counseling, support and personalized assistance.
Transportation: Door-to-door rides within New Canaan and to local towns.
Social Events: Fun and enriching gatherings, excursions, and programs to be active and connect with others.
Groceries & Errands: Grocery shopping, prescription pick up and other helpful errands.
Help at Home: Minor home repairs, changing ceiling light bulbs, moving heavy objects and more.
Technology Assistance: One-on-one assistance in the home to troubleshoot issues for computers, televisions, cell phones and other electronic devices.
Service Providers: Trusthworthy list of home service and repair professionals for hire.
Communication and Visits: Keeping in touch with those who may be facing issues of loneliness and isolation.
Community Resource: Education, advice and referrals for healthy aging.