I have been dating a guy for over six months, but I feel very mixed up about where I stand with him. One day I'm on top of the world, thinking everything is going well, and the next day I feel like I don't matter to him. I get the hot-and-cold treatment from him, and it's really driving me crazy-and lately it's been more cold than hot.
We first met through a shadchan. Things were going so well that we dropped the shadchan after the second date, and we then arranged our own dates. But then, without warning, he changed. At first I thought he wanted to break up with me, because he started acting so cold. For example, he'd say that he would call, and then I would not hear from him. Then, out of the blue, he calls. Sometimes when I call him, he acts like I'm interrupting him, even when I know that I am not.
It's the same with our dates. Sometimes he even cancels dates right before I expect him to show up. One time I was waiting for him to pick me up for a date, and I was wondering where he was because he was so late already. I thought something bad had happened to him. He later called to say that something came up and he couldn't make it.
Some people tell me to drop him, but I can't. My friends all say that I shouldn't be so available to him, and that it might help if I play hard-to-get. The thing is that when we are together, he is so good to me that I forget what he does other times. I wish I knew what he is thinking, but I'm too scared to ask him. Is there a way to get him to be more into the relationship like he used to be in the beginning?