Describe an instance when you had to calm an upset customer or co-worker (or student, patient, etc.)

Why Ask About This? The first step to calming someone who is upset is to understand the situation before using techniques that are appropriate for the situation and the individual to attain calm. Responses to this inquiry will provide insight into how the candidate would calm an upset individual.

Possible Followup Questions:

• Who were you dealing with?
• What was your relationship with this person?
• Why was this person upset?
• Why was it important that you calm this person before addressing their issue?
• What did you do or say in an attempt to calm the person?
• What was the outcome of your actions?

How candidates may respond and how to score those responses:

Unsatisfactory response (worth a score of 1) – These candidates tell the person to “Calm down. I can’t deal with you until you calm down.”

Adequate response (score as 3) – The candidates listened to the person’s concerns, before suggesting what they should do.

Outstanding “top-performer” response (worth a 5) – These candidates allow the person to rant before asking, “How do you feel this situation could be resolved?”

Reference Check Question: Describe a time when [candidates name] attempted to calm an upset customer (co-worker, student, patient, etc.).

Caution: Each workplace and every manager is unique. Workplace cultures and values are different. There is no such thing as a perfect interview question. Questions that work for one manager may not work for another. Before choosing to use this, or any question, consider whether it fits your unique set of circumstances. Is the question right for you and your work environment? The same is true for the suggested rating scale, which may or may not reflect the culture of your organization or your observations of how your top performers respond to circumstances similar to those described. You should adapt both the question and rating guide to fit your circumstances and leadership style.

During my Interview Right to Hire Right workshops, participants learn to write behaviour description interview (BDI) questions based on their understanding of what makes top performers successful.

Just sharing a bit of your day with a staff member demonstrates that you value staff members as individuals. There are different strategies to being accessible. Schedule office hours or times when you will be available to take calls from staff. Plan regular one-on-one meetings with staff members. Put up a “Do Not Disturb” sign. Turn off your cellphone. Maintain neutral facial expressions and body language. Resist the temptation to offer solutions or rebut what others say. You’re there to listen, so listen!

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Help save a tree and make recognition Timely by sending e-cards. Your message of appreciation will arrive the recipient’s inbox immediately. 

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Here are two questions to help you learn whether staff members feel they are being recognized for the right reasons. “What do you do that I’m not noticing? Are your colleagues doing things that I am not recognizing them for, but I should be?”

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Recognition is infectious. You will encourage peer recognition simply by conscientiously recognizing others, yourself. Become a role model, an example of what to do. The more often you express appreciation, the more likely it is that members of your team will heed your advice to express appreciation to their co-workers. They will begin to recognize the efforts and achievements of others more often. 

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Thanks, Again! More Simple, Inexpensive Ways for Busy Leaders to Recognize Staff is available at Audreys Books, 10702 Jasper Ave., Edmonton (and on its website) and online from Amazon, Indigo, FriesenPress Bookstore, Barnes & Noble and on the Apple Books app.