Fall in love again!
When we were doing our research for the Marriage in Christ seminar, the most consistent advice we came across was that husbands and wives should deepen their friendship and rekindle their love for one another. As one writer put it, they should be intentional about “falling in love again.” After making Christ the center of our marriage, that became the second goal of the MIC seminar. The suggestions for prayer together, the conversation starters and loving actions were the practical ways in which we incorporated that good advice about building our friendship and falling in love again. But does it really work?
The research suggested that something as simple as saying "Good-bye, I love you" before you part for the day would work wonders. We had done that early in our marriage, but “life happened” and we lost that little practice. Around that same time, I heard a story about a wife who had lost her husband in a tragic car accident. Her grief was compounded by guilt. She said, “We fought that morning and the last words we said to each other were harsh.” At that moment, I decided that I didn’t want that to be our story. So, we began to say, “Goodbye I love you” before we parted for the day. Even if we had been at odds with each other.
One morning we had bit of a disagreement and were emotionally invested in our own point of view. The casual observer might have thought we were having a little fight. But then it was time to part, so I said, “I don’t care what happened this morning, “I love you.” I gave her a kiss, which I was trying to hold for the count of ten – one of the other small acts that were suggested. Well we both burst out laughing, and because we could not breathe, laugh and kiss at the same time we didn’t make it to ten. By then we had forgotten what we were disagreeing about.
Adella puts it this way, “It has become such a very nice little morning ritual for us that one day I heard the garage door open, the car start, the door close again, and he had not said, “Good bye, I love you.” I was disappointed. Within a few minutes he appeared at the door of our bedroom, with his delightful little smile that I love and said, “I was nearly out of the cul-de-sac when I remembered I hadn’t said goodbye. He gave me a little kiss and said, “Goodbye, I love you.” Some habits are really nice.”
Be intentional this month and fall in love again!