"Often, these days, I wake with fear; frightened for the world and wondering what the day will bring. I text my husband, who lives in Italy, to make sure he is okay and then I reach out to the friends I know who are infected with COVID-19. It can feel exhausting and isolating to start each day this way; contemplating the impact of this pandemic on our personal lives.
I know, however, that it is okay to feel fear. It is natural and we have reason for it. But we need not panic. I believe that we will make it to the other side and most of us will be okay, though potentially changed. I also believe that it will take faith, in several forms, to get us there—faith in the directives from public health officials, faith in our innate goodness as human beings, and faith in the essential workers in every field who are on the frontline of this epidemic: It will take having faith in something other than ourselves, and for many of us, faith in God to help move us beyond our fear.
Retired Episcopal Bishop Steven Charleston wrote, “Fear is real because it grows from what is real: real suffering, real loss, real death. But it is never as strong as faith: real courage, real compassion, real love. It may overwhelm, for the moment, but it can never overcome.”
The world is a changed place with a new unseen danger that has upended old routines and has furnished us with new ones. We need to be careful about the things we touch and we are spending more time in front of the computer than less in order to maintain our social contacts. Yet, as humans we are sensual and communal beings and this goes beyond the core of how we are meant to live our lives with one another.
As a primary care doctor, I’m among a group of physicians preparing to meet the demands of what is certain to come upon us in the next few weeks. My days are filled with seeing patients, messages, telemedicine calls and disaster preparedness meetings. Soon, I and others waiting, will be called to replace colleagues who will fall ill to this disease.
Stress levels are high, often overwhelming, but each day I meet kindness to lift my spirits. Patients, especially, have been expressive of their appreciation and concern: Caring for us as much as we care for them.
Mistakes will be made. Certainly, there will be delays in diagnosis as routine tests will become unavailable, making way for the onslaught of COVID-19 patients crowding our hospitals. The ‘Art of Medicine’ and Reason must guide us now.
Though we might seem a bit disorganized or chaotic; we’re in disaster mode and, well, you know: “best-laid plans.” Give us a chance to figure it out. We’re scared too. Scared for you, for our families and our friends; we are scared for our colleagues and we are scared for ourselves but, we are here to help. We are human.
Temper your frustrations and show kindness to first responders and all essential workers who are risking their lives to make you safe and to provide you with food, clean water, electricity and all that we take for granted: Thank the person who delivers your mail. And please, listen to what the medical experts are saying.
Right now, we all need to do our part to help keep the healthcare system from becoming overburdened. We can make a difference. Otherwise, more lives will be lost than need be; young and old, bright and spirited, those whose voices will be lost and gone forever.
Shelter in place and wash your hands, often. If you can’t order in groceries, medicines and what is essential, then go out only when you really need something. Don’t make daily trips to the grocer and don’t hoard. Minimize your physical contact with the outside world now; so that we can all soon return to it.
Perhaps, then, we’ll find our cities and our waterways, our planet home, cleaner and restored to good health."
God’s healing touch be upon us.
The Rev. Anthony J. Vaccaro, MD
Anthony Vaccaro is an Internist doing Primary Care/HIV medicine for Northwestern Medicine. He is also an assisting priest at Church of Our Saviour Episcopal Church on Fullerton Parkway in Chicago.
