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Our Gift From the Giving Tree
Over 20 years ago our family pulled a tag off a local Giving Tree, thinking we’d give a needy child a holiday gift or two. As the experience evolved, we received an extraordinary gift from the young lady whose name we pulled. What my family and I received burns brightly today.
My son Andy opened the envelope from the Giving Tree and read it aloud. As always, we hoped to make a child’s Christmas brighter.
“Girl, 13,” he began. I could see Laurie smile. After being surrounded by boys 365 days of the year, maybe she could do some holiday shopping somewhere other than a sporting goods store.
My son became silent.
“What does she want?” we wondered. In years past, we have seen long lists of requested gifts. The Giving Tree kids were, after all, kids, with lots of wishes and wants. Like so many other families who drew from the Giving Tree, we did the best we could, sometimes completing the requested list, sometimes not.
As we waited for Andy to tell us what the young girl hoped to get for Christmas, I flashed back to prior holiday gifts. The Christmas Eve a friend and I constructed a race car set long after the boys were asleep. The foosball table I put together night after night in the neighbor’s garage, only to build it so incorrectly that it was unplayable. The nights of watching Laurie so carefully place the presents under the tree, wanting it to be perfect for the boys on Christmas morning.
I thought of the best gift anyone ever got their child: Grant’s house. The house was an old refrigerator box that his mom and dad had painted and cut windows and doors in. Prominently displayed above the main entrance were the words “Grant’s house.”
Their son slept in the box every night for over six months. The great gift cost them nothing.
“She wants bubble bath,” Andy finally said softly.
“What else?”
“Nothing. Just bubble bath. That’s all that is on her list.”
We sat in silence for a moment, all thinking of the young girl we had drawn. In the world of up-to-the-minute fashions, toys, and games, she simply wanted bubble bath. Something to make her feel soft and relaxed and pretty. A gift she couldn’t show off at school or compare with others. Nothing to brag about. Just bubble bath. For her.
Our conversations began slowly. Initially we were almost embarrassed. The gifts we had coming certainly seemed extravagant and trite. Consumables to be consumed. Things we wanted, but generally didn’t need. The boys let us know that they were more than willing to cut back their gift list. They felt they’d been greedy it seemed.
The dialogue increased as we realized that this young girl was probably right. She had asked for something affordable and personal. It was for her alone. Her expectations were reasonable and could be fulfilled. She could have a good Christmas without great expense, extravagance, or comparison with others.
I asked my mom some years ago about Christmas growing up poor in the middle of Wyoming in the 1930’s. Like so many people her age, she spoke of handmade clothes and refurbished hand-me-downs. One Christmas she remembered fondly getting unexpected, extra gifts: an orange and a pencil. I laughed, thinking of how most youngsters today would react to receiving those as holiday gifts. I assumed children of such limited wants were gone, engulfed by the keeping-up-with-the-Jones society they are raised in. Until we drew from the Giving Tree this year.
Our family conversation evolved into a delightful discussion of the fun we’ve had at Christmas.
The young girl will get her bubble bath and more. But our gifts won’t compare to the gift she gave us. Introspection. Perspective. Appreciation. A reminder that the holiday is really about family, memories, sharing.
Happy holidays! May your family be near you, your memories fond, and your holiday sharing be loving and personal.
Copyright Jeff Tolman 2024. All rights reserved.
An earlier version of this story appeared in North Kitsap Herald, December 2001
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