FOCUSED and Inspired:
I'll Protect Every One of You
October 2, 2018
Insights from Lisa Mitzel

When my daughter, McKenna, was 12, I coached her basketball team. I said to her one day, “The NJB administrators need a coach, so, I’m coaching your team.” She got quiet… She folded her arms and frowned. “What?” I asked, “I don’t need to do this, they were going to cancel the team so I’m doing it for you.” She stared at the ground and said, “I don’t want you to pick on me or embarrass me.” I got it. “Ohh…well I don’t want to do that either, sweetie.”

In that moment, I knew my intention for the season was to listen closely; I had to stay in tune with her, and not get completely caught up in the physical results—which I’m very good at. My message: Athletes need us to care about their feelings. We need to be a safe place and allow them to feel their emotions and feel safe while they face their challenges. That year, McKenna and I grew closer, we won the division championship, and she now plays basketball in college. Maybe, maybe I was a good listener.

Sneak Peek - from FAI:
Chapter 1 - I'll Protect Every One of You
How to Talk about Sensitive Issues

Talking to young people about sensitive issues is not simple. They’re nervous, they’ll wonder if we can be patient, see it from their view, and believe them. An athlete’s highest desire is that you will listen to them…and care. Both of you can take a deep breath and promise to be respectful. In one-on-one conversations, remember to keep doors and windows open and always have a third person present or nearby.

Listen to Athletes

 1. Before you start a sensitive conversation, get into a mindful place and connect to your own intention of practicing empathy toward your athlete.

2. Do not rush, do not get distracted, and please do not dismiss their thoughts or feelings. Focus on this important young person and the process of listening and practicing safety.

3. Smile, take a breath, and notice their eyes, their body language, their voice, and how much of a struggle or pain they’re feeling. Be very present with them.

4. Tell them things like this:
I’m really glad to speak with you and help you.
Sports can be really challenging, so I’m here to help.
I will listen, and you can ask me any questions you like.
We’ll find ways to make things better.
They may not tell you everything, but they know you are a safe place to go. That’s what matters most. We serve athletes best when we help them face challenges and learn to manage emotions.
 
Next week’s FAI Sneak Peek - from Chapter 2: I Hear You!  Learn the  ‘ Human Calculation’ and “Going Inward.” How to be highly productive by understanding yourself and athletes better.

Spotlight:
FAI Endorsement from Steve Kerr, 3-Time NBA Champion Coach

How honored and thrilled I am to have Coach Kerr’s support for my book Focused and Inspired : "A revolutionary book that answers the urgent call to identify and prevent abuse in sports. Lisa Mitzel inspires us to embrace wisdom, positive partnerships, and truly value the athlete’s voice, daily, on the path to success."  Steve Kerr, Head Coach of the Golden State Warriors, is a  truly inspiring role model and human being we can all learn from!

Focused Tour heading to Northern California
I’ll be in Northern California Oct. 13 - 20 for clinics. Contact me to come to visit you! I often add dates and happy to add your team/program to this trip, or for a future date. I personally sign books and it's fun and inspiring!

Sponsorships
When programs cannot afford all of the expenses involved, funding is important. Every athlete needs protection. Contribute to safety education at GoFundMe. Learn more here: https://www.gofundme.com/athlete-safety-education-tour
Lisa’s Videos: Take-a-Breath Tuesdays.  
My short videos spotlight parts of my books, share news, and support YOU in developing self-awareness and being an effective coach or support in guiding athletes. Follow me on: FB, IG @mitzel_coach, and Twitter.
Focused and Inspired is dedicated to every athlete who has ever been hurt by the misuse of power in sports, and especially dedicated to the athlete-survivors of sexual abuse, who are still healing, and who spoke up and shared their stories. You are so brave! Thank you for helping others to speak up and begin to heal.
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