In case you haven’t heard, I am a devoted Gilmore Girls fan! One episode in particular (Season 5, Episode 10) really speaks to my soul whenever I watch it.

One of the characters is Luke. He is a 30-something confirmed bachelor who is sometimes grumpy, but an integral part of the small Connecticut community where the show takes place. In this episode, there is a huge celebration going on for Miss Patti, the town's colorful dance teacher. At the same time, Luke is having a difficult celebration of his own. On the 30th of every November, he simply disappears. No one knows where he goes or what he does on this day. 

Enter Lorelai Gilmore, a single mother also in her thirties. She and Luke have begun a relationship, and she is concerned about his disappearing act on November 30. When she questions him about where he goes, he says, “I disappear. I don't work. I don't talk to anyone. I get in a funk. I have a dark day. I don't like to talk about it.”

It turns out that his dad died on November 30 over a decade ago and this is Luke’s way of dealing with his feelings about that loss. He gives himself a day to feel the anger, the sorrow, the grief. Just that one day—as he called it—a “dark day.” Then he returns and goes back to his life as usual.

“What an excellent idea!” I thought as the episode unfolded. When sorrowful feelings come, why not give ourselves a day to honor those feelings and let them be? I could give myself a “Dark Day” every year on the 15th of July in honor of the day that my beloved cat Sasha died. Or on the 4th of March to grieve my mother. I could choose a random day every year to let myself feel the sadness about my decision not to have children in this lifetime, or a random day to honor all of my losses.

I loved this insight. But there was more. When the 30th of November came, Luke didn't leave town right away. In the morning, he went to visit Lorelai for a few minutes and she got him to talk about his father a little bit. He connects with Lorelai three times on his “Dark Day,” and this is a huge step for him—to be with another person on a day when he usually doesn't see anyone. Toward the end of this episode, he actually attends Miss Patti's Celebration, and while he isn't exactly bubbling over with joy and enthusiasm, he has the softened look of someone who thought he was alone and suddenly realizes he is part of a community.

There is much wisdom here for all of us. If you need a “Dark Day,” go ahead and give that to yourself. Wrap your grief around you like a soft velvet blanket and give yourself over to it for twenty-four hours. If you need to reach out to someone and share your anguish, give that to yourself instead. There is a time and a place for both . . . and each can be equally healing. It's all a matter of what you need at any particular time.

Make a SoulCollage® card that expresses your “Dark Day” (real or imagined).

Make a SoulCollage® card to represent the absolute fact that you are not alone in this world.

Editor’s Note: This essay is from Anne Marie’s book, Into the Heart of SoulCollage®. 

Anne Marie Bennett is a SoulCollage® Facilitator / Trainer, published author, website goddess, and two-time cancer survivor who was mentored directly by Seena Frost.Anne Marie lives in eastern Massachusetts with her middle-aged husband, one adolescent feline, and a treasury of birds, squirrels and chipmunks who keep them hopping. Her books about SoulCollage® are available here.

with SoulCollage® Facilitator

Lisa Handley from California

KaleidoSoul Kindred Spirit members.

Visit this page for more info now.

The hard thing about healing is that when it happens, we would rather avoid the pain and the pressure of dealing with the depths of our own truth, but healing always happens inside of and alongside life. 

The need for healing illuminates where our life path is leading us. When deeper healing is needed, it might come like a sneak attack and the first thing that one might want to do is cut and run. But if you can choose to settle, orient to the moment, and find that place inside where you can land and explore the story… in this much can be revealed. The best way to do this is within your art; finding palpable expression can reveal deep wisdom.                                                                

Invite yourself to stay in that moment and recognize the power and potency that is active . . . OR choose to seek the need or feeling that is most active or missing. Remember that healing is not possible without feeling. Feeling requires time and space; maturity adds to the development of willingness, curiosity, honesty, and discernment. It’s true that a healing field can feel like walking through a war zone, and at times like that the most potent thing to do is to activate or create with it and see it what is there. Courage can be brought forward to assist. 

A powerful way to explore pain is to use the landscape as a starting point. Let yourself imagine the inner place that you find yourself traveling through. What do you see, feel, and discover as you create a reflective space?

You might choose to add the symbolism of a Tower (see image above). As expressed in the major arcana of the Tarot, the Tower represents old patterns and structures that are being destroyed. This can feel chaotic and frightening, but it’s part of the healing process. Explore what your Tower looks like when you create, knowing your inner wisdom is revealing new information.

You might also want to add one presence, energy or source that brings heat, fire, and heart. Explore how an alchemical addition will serve, guide, protect, enter, or encircle the tower. This can be literal or metaphoric imagery. You may decide to bring a dragon to this place as an avatar. Ask your art what this addition offers, how it brings about change; ask what guidance comes in this form.

You could also invite a lighthouse, or a different space/form that holds potential. This light-form may represent a place, person, or entity that will offer change and can transform the story. The lighthouse might be a Committee part of self, an archetypal Council presence, or a beacon on the edge of a new place.

Notice where you are supported and held within this layered process, pay attention to how the story unfolds. How will your art and cards reflect and reveal new aspects of the situation? What do you need to know, feel, and heal within this space of seeking?

Cat Caracelo, M.A. is a Depth Coach, Artist and a SoulCollage® Facilitator since 2007. Cat guides, coaches and mentors individuals and leads groups worldwide, incorporating expressive arts and transformative process. Cat is the creator of QuestPath and Mythos Journey work. Her dynamic program offerings and destination retreats combine thematic journeywork and art-as-process to explore personal myth. Please visit Cat’s website to find articles and information about programs, retreats, and more.  

Art is a soul language. SoulCollage®, Mixed Media, and JourneyCircles™ are the favorite creative ways to participate, and you can expand your journeying with Word Art, Poetry, Paint, Assemblage, Altered Books, and Art Journaling. Connect with amazing women as you travel your path. Dip in or dive deep with the seasonal energies, lore, sacred symbols, and mythic themes offered around the eight seasons on the sacred wheel of the year. Honor your own pace and creative ways, work with sacred stories, mythic memory, phases of life, personal rhythms, and archetypal energies as you connect with an amazing tribe of Quest sisters, traveling together all year.

Our Kindred Spirits members save additional 15%

This weekend—at the Franciscan Renewal Center—offers meaningful play and creativity as we connect with our younger selves. Enjoy Michele's "Playing with a Full Deck" activities, and some sessions led by others. You'll come away with enthusiasm for your personal practice, and if you're a Facilitator, for your own workshops. Plenty of free time for card making and enjoying the sanctuary spaces of the Center, including a pool and labyrinth. This gathering includes learning, sharing, individual activities and group rituals - imagine the perfect blend of a retreat, workshop, community of peers, and meeting of friends.

Kindred Spirits save $50. 

Lots more information on this page.  

Spend a delightful four days at Spirit in the Desert, in beautiful Carefree. This retreat is designed for you to explore your Self, using images, imagination, and intuition via the process of SoulCollage®. You will also be guided to create a simple hand-made journal with pockets for your SoulCollage® cards and pages to write whatever wants to be expressed. Daily labyrinth walks will enhance your observation skills and inspire you to take in the beauty of nature as you walk your spiral path to self-understanding. 

Travel to the place of myth and memories, where the landscape is a mirror of the Soul. Glastonbury, the ancient isle of Avalon is rich with sacred and ancient sites. Explore the earth-based, mystic energies; honor the Goddess in the bounty of Spring. Make inspired art with SoulCollage® and more as you deepen your story in this all-inclusive women's retreat!

More information here.  

November: Death

December: Rest

Mats and supplies are found here in the KaleidoSoul Shop 

World of SoulCollage®- The official website of SoulCollage Inc.

KaleidoSoul - Spinning the fragments of your world into wholeness and beauty through SoulCollage®.

Kindred Spirits SoulCollage® 

Membership- Worldwide connections with SoulCollagers, plus 24/7 inspiration and ideas for card making and working with your cards!