Hello Sweet Snippeteers,

So, the last SNIPPETS I had a chance to write was on September 29 and was a different kind of snippet from the usual. It offered information about "the C word" (that horrid cancer) and tips for thinking outside the box to treat it and hopefully beat it.

I felt compelled to include it because during that week, my big sister, Paula, 65, entered a Pennsylvania hospital with declining symptoms caused by multiple tumors on her brain and lungs.

Devastatingly, my "Skissy" Paula lost the battle. She died at 4 pm on the 5th of October ... 24 days before her 66th birthday.

It is an understatement to say that my brother Danny, our younger sister Pamela, and I, are destroyed over this enormous loss in our world. Team Molino has been drastically altered. We were still grieving Mamma Gina who left us only a short two years ago this month (October 29th on Paula's birthday and our nephew Paul's birthday).

We were blasted by the speed in which that stupid disease took down our sweet sister, diagnosed with brain junk at July's end ... and snatched from us two months later. Watching her fade was heart-wrenching ... eight days of sitting in her hospital room, talking to her, praying over her, holding her hand, putting makeup on her, playing familiar soundtracks from musicals we loved as kids, giving her food and water, updating our big Italian family & friends, welcoming visitors, helping her husband muddle through, and tightly holding her 19-year-old twins.

My sister, Paula, was a loyal snippteer - she read every one. She sent along the most prayers of anyone - she was constantly concerned about others. She was a zesty force - tons of energy, moved 5 miles a minute, and told it like it was. She lived actively, efficiently, lovingly, bravely.

No one wants to be "that family" sitting in the front pew of a memorial service. And yet there we were on October 14th - in disbelief, in a fog, memorializing our sister - staring at her enlarged photos of her beautiful smiling face and blue eyes.

Now the face of an Angel.

And then! And then ... yesterday our Uncle Joe Molino suddenly decided to join Paula and our parents up in the Great Heavenly Party. That was our second shock this month.

Uncle Joe was happy and healthy and looked great at Paula's memorial service as he traveled up to Pennsylvania to her church in support of us - "his other kids." (Uncle Joe is my Papa Louie's last sibling out of five.) Even at age 90, he was rock solid and still living independently with his bride, Aunt Anna, 91, in their original house in Maryland. He was just painting his shed on Tuesday!! Wednesday morning he didn't feel good, went to the hospital, and his golden heart gave out.

AND ISN'T THAT THE WAY TO GO, Snippeteers? LIVING LIFE UP TO THE LAST POSSIBLE MINUTE!! Paula did that, too. She was just beaching and camping over Labor Day weekend, and working her two jobs as a college adjunct professor and a kitchen designer, up to the weekend she entered the hospital.

So, don't ask me what day it is. I put the trash out Tuesday thinking it was Wednesday. I stuck a stamp on an envelope where the return address goes. I forget to brush my teeth. I put the dog food in the fridge instead of the pantry. I almost dropped pup Lupini. I even had writer's block (which never happens).

Faith will see me through - God always does. Paula will always walk alongside me. She will always be our #2 of four in Team Molino.

Dear Paula ... until we hug again, my sister - thank you for your unending love. Thank you for our wonderful life together.

CANCER SUCKS, I will shout it off the rooftop!! I know each of you agree and have been touched in some God-awful way personally or by watching someone you love deal with it. Prayers to those of you in the middle of it all and facing it. XOXOXO

"Love the snippet this week. It's OK if you missed a week, you did a good one. I have had acupuncture trying to alleviate some residual pain and it actually did help. I have the CALM app for meditation - which I use a lot: when getting needles or my BP checked, when my hubs and I disagree, or even when my grandbabies are a bit frustrating. It works wonders. CALM also has sleep stories, which I use nightly. Avatar has taught me to seek calmness ... to believe in myself, to be calm even if things are a bit chaotic, and to see the good in things when all seems bad. We can do wonderful things when we do these things. 

In rice, inorganic arsenic is found in the two outer layers of the grain - bran and germ - which are removed to refine the grain into white rice. Thus, a greater concentration of arsenic is found in brown rice than white. We need to be careful of the quantity of brown rice we eat."

~ Karan in Middle River, Maryland

"Your snippet last time was beyond excellent and truly meaningful. Grazie mille!"

~ Phyllis in Maryland

"So much good stuff last snippet - gives me a lot to think about!"

~ Karen in Maryland

"Thank you so much for sharing my experience ... for the C-word. I hope it helps anyone open-minded enough to read it and maybe even try a few. It sounds cliche, but never take your health for granted. Once it is gone you will never be the same - physically or emotionally! During these stressful times, I try to channel my inner Nonna Annie [grandmother] and enjoy a simple, happy life. Blow up your TV. Eat your veggies, Be nice! Soak in the sunshine and Kitchen Dance whenever you can."

~ jeanie in Salem, Massachusetts

On the Jersey Shore last weekend, I walked pup Lupini to the beach for a little "church time" as I cried my way there. The beautiful fall morning, a strong sun on my face, watching Lupini happily romp through the sand leash-free, and being one with God and His beachy nature - was simply splendid for my raw soul.

Now, my Little Lupini often gets tons of attention in public. (Well, he is really cute and just so tiny and fuzzy.) Many strangers comment they have never seen a curly long-haired Dachshund (of course not, because I own the only one). :-D

A stranger on the beach further down near the surf began to walk toward us, asking questions about Lupini. I answered the first one but did not stop. "Yes, he is a long-haired Dachshund." When the man kept approaching closer to ask additional questions, I said: "I'm just having some quiet prayer time now" and kept walking.

I did not apologize. I did not explain further. (He either got it or he didn't.) I was merely honoring my quiet time, my prayer time, my boundary, my space. It was not the time to invite in conversation with a stranger. It was time to chat with God and soothe my soul. I just wanted - and needed - to be alone.

Snippeteers, although at times we might "feel bad" if we snuffed someone while emotionally we are standing in a bad place and in an unclear head space, we know we would not normally do that unless it was for a REALLY GOOD REASON.

Praying was a really good reason. Grief flowing through me heavily that morning was a really good reason.

It is okay to honor our time, our space. It is okay to set boundaries. We do not owe a thing to anyone, not even a stranger approaching us. (They either get it or they don't.)

Honor your emotions. Honor the place in your head in which you are during that minute, that hour, that day, that week. Personal boundaries are okay.

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SIDE SNIPPET - Snippeteers, there has been a massive amount of crying going on since September 25, so I might just be this month's Tear Expert. When you cry in front of someone, never apologize for your tears. Crying is okay. Crying is what is coming up for you. I often hear people apologize for their tears. Never apologize for your emotions. We are human beings with HEARTS. And if your tears make someone uncomfortable, they can turn away. That is on them. Yet I bet ... most people will cry along with you.

Part of Paula's Memorial Service notice included a way family & friends could help "in lieu of flowers" (because Paula worked, too) ... this is to assist her husband Doug and their 19-year-old twins.

Whoever wishes to do this (below) in honor of Paula's birthday, I am asking that you email a photo of yourself (or a group together) dressed in one of Paula's favorite colors. Later, I will put together a video montage of everyone, to music. Email photos to Suzanna.Rosa.Molino@gmail.com.