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SOME RUDIMENTARY RUMINATIONS
IT ALL DEPENDS
BY GORDON NEUFELD
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Sometimes in our travels we come upon something that seemed initially like just one more place to visit, only in retrospect to reveal itself as absolutely key to our understanding of the world and our place in it. I remember a few such transforming experiences in my life. My travels over the theoretical landscape of making sense of our children and ourselves as been similar in this regard. Initially it seemed to me that the subject of dependence was only one of a myriad of topics that pertained to today's parenting and teaching. The deeper my immersion into the material however, the more convinced I became that our thinking about dependence couldn't be more singularly pivotal, at the very core of our interactions with our children and indeed, our loved ones. Changes in parenting or teaching would not be truly effective and often not even stick unless these actions emanated from a deep invitation to our dependants to truly depend upon us.
I have also become convinced that being too direct or instrumental in our interactions with our children – goal-focused or outcome-focused as it were - has been our undoing in today's society. We seem to have no reticence whatsoever in revealing what is on our mind concerning them, or what we want from them, or even what we have in mind for them. I have come to know Nature as deeply shy regarding its work and purpose, resisting exposure lest such consciousness sabotage the very conditions that are necessary to realize the desired results. I am sure this is why Nature disguises itself as 'play', for example, giving the illusion that it is 'up to nothing in particular,' so that it has the room it needs to work its developmental magic. As Nature's agents in the lives of our children, it should be no different for us.
We have eschewed the dependence of our children for far too long now – for generations if not centuries, especially in so-called enlightened societies - with societal results that are deeply concerning. It is high time to return to our senses - that is, to trust and to lean upon the spontaneous and benevolent life force that is yearning to bring to potential our children, and through them, a society that is not crippled by immaturity.
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Editor's note: The Wisdom of Dependence was the topic of this year's annual conference in April of this year. Dr. Neufeld only had enough time to share a small portion of the material he had prepared on this topic. Given the timely and critical importance of this subject, we decided to walk it out this Fall in a series of four webinars which include a short presentation by Dr. Neufeld followed by a panel discussion where he is joined by a few of the Neufeld Institute faculty. We invite you to watch this short preview video (above) and join us for the entire series. | |
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Making Sense of Hypersensitivity
Offered by Jule Epp
Tuesdays 9:30 - 10:00 am Pacific
Oct 3 to 31, 2023
$200 | Runs for 5 weeks
Early-bird discount:
Save 10% until Sept 26, 2023
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Play 101
Offered by Bree Jordan
Tuesdays 11:30 am - 12:30 pm Pacific
Nov 14, 2023 to Jan 9, 2024
$150 | Runs for 6 weeks
Early-bird discount:
Save 10% until November 7, 2023
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Includes a bonus wrap-up Q&A
with Gordon Neufeld!
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FREE WEBINAR ON SEPTEMBER 19, 2023 AT 7 PM PACIFIC
"NOURISHED" BOOK LAUNCH WEBINAR
DEBORAH MACNAMARA with GORDON NEUFELD
Join Deborah MacNamara in conversation with Gordon Neufeld, as the Neufeld Institute hosts a special online event to launch Deborah’s new book, Nourished: Connection, Food, and Caring for our Kids (and everyone else we love).
A recording will be available to participants for 7 days following the webinar.
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WEBINAR SERIES ON WEDNESDAYS AT 10 AM PACIFIC
WISDOM OF DEPENDENCE WEBINAR SERIES
GORDON NEUFELD with TAMARA STRIJACK, DEBORAH MACNAMARA & GENEVIEVE SCHREIER
The Wisdom of Dependence was the keynote address of our 2023 annual conference in April. While preparing his keynote, what emerged for Dr. Neufeld was a realization of how absolutely core and pivotal one’s attitudes towards dependence are to interacting with our children and even our loved ones. Realizing he could not fit in all he had to share in one keynote, Dr. Neufeld created and recorded a four-part series, the first two parts of which were presented during the conference. Given the timely and critical importance of this subject, we decided to walk ALL of the material out this Fall in a series of four webinars which each include a short presentation by Dr. Neufeld, followed by a panel discussion where he is joined by a few of the Neufeld Institute faculty. We invite you to watch this short preview video and join us for the entire series.
Wednesdays 10:00 - 11:15 am Pacific
October 4 to 25, 2023
$90 | Runs for 4 weeks
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OCTOBER 16 & 17, 2023
THE WISDOM OF TRAUMA
IN THE CONTEXT OF PARENTING
UPCOMING IN-PERSON CONFERENCE IN PRAGUE, CZECH REPUBLIC
This fall, Tamara Strijack and Gabor Maté will come together in Prague to explore parenting and childcare in the context of the wisdom of trauma and developmental science. As part of the two day conference, Gabor is offering a half day on Compassionate Inquiry and Tamara is offering a half day on Playful Therapy.
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NOVEMBER 6 - 8, 2023
TOWARDS FLOURISHING CHILDREN & YOUTH
UPCOMING IN-PERSON CONFERENCE IN SASKATOON
Join Gordon Neufeld, Deborah MacNamara, Tamara Strijack, and Eva de Gosztonyi in Saskatoon, Canada from November 6-8, 2023 for our first in-person conference since 2019! A live-streaming option is also available.
This event is co-hosted by Jack Hirose & Associates. Further information and registration is available through their website.
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Since our last report, we have made significant strides in creating material to support the teaching of Neufeld courses in Ukrainian to the social workers and interveners of the Kyiv City Centre of Social Services. Our team consists of Iryna Shokur, facilitator, and Julia Fomina, co-ordinator, both Ukrainians, and Eva de Gosztonyi, senior Faculty. To date, we have created a website, a YouTube channel with recordings with Ukrainian subtitles, a Facebook page, and have translated over 15 articles. We have devised a Study Plan for the Kyiv Centre staff using written material, and Julia and Irina have presented three sessions to about 50 participants. We have had to engage the services of a professional language centre to create voice-overs for three key courses: Aggression, Anxiety and Alpha.
Your generous donations have allowed us to purchase translation services and to compensate Iryna and Julia for the tremendous work that they are doing. The staff of the Kyiv Centre have expressed their sincere gratitude for the support that the Neufeld Institute is providing them in these challenging times. We have since been approached by three other agencies who would like to take courses with us.
If you wish to be involved in this much needed initiative, your donations are warmly welcomed.
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