End of Life Concerns Club

Cassie Tzur welcomes Jim Greenberg as President elect of End Of Life Concerns Club



GREETINGS EOLC CLUB MEMBERS…..TRANSITIONS…

    I HAVE SOME NEWS TO SHARE!  I PLAN TO RETIRE (END MY VOLUNTEER SERVICE)

AS PRESIDENT OF OUR CLUB ON MARCH 17, 2025.  THAT WILL END MY FOUR YEARS 

IN A LEADERSHIP ROLE.  I HAVE LOVED LEADING OUR CLUB AND FEEL WE HAVE GIVEN

STRONG AND VALUABLE END OF LIFE PROGRAMS TO OUR ROSSMOOR COMMUNITY.

   AND SOME GOOD NEWS…JIM GREENBERG, RETIRED MD, CO-FACILITATOR OF THE

DEATH CAFE AND BOARD MEMBER, WILL BE TAKING MY PLACE IN MARCH.  OUR BOARD

HAD OUR FIRST EVER BOARD RETREAT AT THE HOME OF RICHARD NAEGLE (OUR 

TREASURER), AND UNANIMOUSLY VOTED TO HAVE JIM BECOME OUR NEW PRESIDENT.

    IN MARCH I HAVE PLANNED A LITTLE TRIP TO HAWAII, WHERE I LIVED FOR 27 YEARS,

TO SEE OLD FRIENDS.  YOU WILL STILL SEE ME IN ROSSMOOR AFTER THAT.

    I HAVE HAD THE PLEASURE OF MEETING SO MANY DYNAMIC PEOPLE THROUGH MY

ROLE AT THE CLUB, AND I AM GRATEFUL FOR MY EXPERIENCE AND OPPORTUNITY TO

SERVE.  I THANK OUR BOARD FOR WORKING SO WELL AS A TEAM, AND ALSO LYNN

LIVELY, FORMER PRESIDENT OF OUR END OF LIFE CONCERNS CLUB  FOR ENCOURAGING 

ME TO SERVE. 

Cassie Tzur: ENDOFLIFECONCERNS@GMAIL.COM 

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JIM GREENBERG AND BESS CHOSAK, CO-FACILiTATORS

The last Death Cafe met on Friday, January 10, 2025. Despite the breakdown of the microphone system in the Vista Room, we were able to hear one another fairly well across the circle of around 35 attendees. Expecting to have the problem fixed by the next Cafe on Friday, February 14, 2025.

Here is the poem read by Bess at the last Death Cafe:

Otherwise

Jane Kenyon 

I got out of bed

on two strong legs. 

It might have been otherwise. 

I ate cereal, sweet milk, ripe, flawless peach. 

It might have been otherwise.

I took the dog uphill

to the birch wood. 

All morning I did

the work I love. 

At noon I lay down 

with my mate. It might

have been otherwise. 

We ate dinner together 

at a table with silver candlesticks. 

It might have been otherwise. 

I slept in a bed 

in a room with paintings 

on the walls, and 

planned another day

just like this day. 

But one day, I know,

it will be otherwise.

from Otherwise, 1996

Graywolf Press, St. Paul, Minn.

Copyright 1996 by the Estate of Jane Kenyon.

GLORIA GLUSKIN, FILM CHAIR

 FILMS

The next film Million Dollar Baby, starring Clint Eastwood and Hillary Swank, will be on Monday March 17th at 1 pm in the Peacock Theater.  Check Newspaper for more details. 

For any questions or suggestions about films that you might like to recommend please contact Gloria Gluskin at ggluskin1@gmail.com or text to: (407) 415-8682.

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POSTER FROM "MILLION DOLLAR BABY"

Penny Reed, LCSW, PROGRAM MODERATOR

PROGRAMS

OUR CLUB INVITES ALL OF YOU TO OUR PRESENTATION ON MONDAY, FEBRUARY 17, 2025 AT 1PM IN THE CLUB ROOM AT CREEKSIDE CALLED “THE FAMILY CAREGIVER AND THE END OF LIFE PATIENT”.  THE MODERATOR WILL BE PENNY REED, LCSW, DIRECTOR OF ROSSMOOR’S COUNSELING CENTER.

PENNY WILL HAVE A DIALOGUE WITH THREE WOMEN WHO HAVE CARED FOR THEIR TERMINALLY ILL HUSBANDS, AND FOUND VALUE IN USING HOSPICE AT HOME.  

THE WOMEN ARE: CASSIE TZUR, PRESIDENT OF THE END OF LIFE CONCERNS CLUB AND TWO CLUB MEMBERS, PHYLLIS JACOBS AND MAXINE TOPPER.  THE CLUB HOPES THIS DISCUSSION WILL BE OF HELP FOR THOSE WHO ARE CURRENTLY CAREGIVERS OR ANTICIPATE BECOMING A CAREGIVER IN THE FUTURE.

THE PROGRAM WILL LOOK AT SUCH THINGS…AS WHEN A PARTNER IS IN THE POSITION TO 

HAVE NO CHOICE BUT TO TAKE ON THIS ROLE, WHAT CAN SHE/HE DO TO GET SOME

HELP FOR THEMSELVES? IF THERE IS NO CHOICE WHAT ARE THE OPTIONS VERSES THE 

END OF LIFE PATIENT REMAINING AT HOME—-SUCH AS ASSISTED LIVING, PAID CAREGIVERS

AND RESPITE CARE, THAT COULD HELP.  ALSO CONSIDERED WILL BE WHAT IS THE PATIENT’S

PERSPECTIVE OF WHAT THEY HOPE AND EXPECT FROM A FAMILY OR FRIEND CAREGIVER?

ANOTHER THING TO BE CONSIDERED IS: HOW CAN A FRIEND OFFER HELP AND NOT BE TOO

INTRUSIVE WHEN DOING THIS? 

SOME PEOPLE ARE NOT NATURAL CAREGIVERS, AND POSSIBLY A DAUGHTER OR SON OR 

FRIEND COULD STEP UP AND HELP TO BE THE LEAD PERSON FOR HOME CARE.

AN ADDITIONAL IMPORTANT POINT TO REMEMBER IS WHEN THE PATIENT IS UNDER 

HOSPICE CARE—-THEY (THE HOSPICE TEAM MEMBERS) ARE NOT THERE 24/7.  SOMEONE

IS “ON CALL” BUT THE RN, SOCIAL WORKER, AIDE OR CLERGY MIGHT COME ONLY 

ONCE A WEEK.  EACH HOSPICE CLIENT IS REGUALAIRLY RE-EVALUATED AND A TEAM

OF HOSPICE HELPERS IS SCHEDULED FOR THAT CLIENT.  THE FAMILY WILL HAVE TO CREATE 

A GROUP OF PEOPLE TO HELP, ESPECIALLY IF HELP IS NEEDED FOR MANY MONTHS.

ROSSMOOR RESIDENTS SHOULD BE AWARE A DOCTOR REFERS A PATIENT AND FAMILY TO

HOSPICE WHEN THE PATIENT’S LIFE EXPECTANCY IS ANTICIPATED TO BE SIX MONTHS

OR LESS.  A FAMILY CAN INITIATE THIS CONVERSATION.

PLEASE COME AND LISTEN TO THESE WOMEN’S  END OF LIFE STORIES.  THERE WILL BE 

TIME FOR QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS AT THE END OF THE PROGRAM.

FOR MORE INFORMATION PLEASE CONTACT CASSIE TZUR AT (925) 285-4071 OR 

ENDOFLIFECONCERNS@GMAIL.COM 

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Image sent to club by member, Regis McKenna

THESE WORDS WERE SENT BY EOLC CLUB NEW BOARD MEMBER, NANCY DIMSDALE TO CASSIE TZUR, TO SHARE THIS IN OUR NEWSLETTER.

FOR THOSE MEMBERS WHO WERE NOT PRESENT, AT OUR DECEMBER 13, 2024 DEATH CAFE,

A DISCUSSION ABOUT WINTER AND DARKNESS EMERGED AND WE EXPLORED IT FROM THE

PERSPECTIVE OF SEVERAL MEMBERS.  I THINK YOU WILL FIND THIS POET’S WORDS MEANINGFUL

“DARKNESS IS ALWAYS DARKNESS UNTIL YOU STEP INTO IT.

WITHIN IT, EYES OPEN, YOUR VISION ADJUSTS, AND YOU CAN NOT JUST BEAR WITNESS 

BUT WRITE WHAT YOU FIND—THE DARKNESS AND THE LIGHT, THE DIVINE WITHIN THE OBSTACLE.”

Quoted from Jessica Jacobs  FOUNDER . PRESIDENT . EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR, YETZIRAH, A HEART FOR JEWISH POETRY

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MARLEY MIDDLEBROOK, MEMBERSHIP CHAIR

We continue to receive your membership renewals. Thank you for supporting our work at the End of Life Concerns Club.

This week, I had the privilege to join my terminally ill friend and her palliative care team to put her handprints on weighted blankets. 

Now, her two young-adult children will have the blankets and her handprints to embrace themselves with “wraparound” hugs from their mom forever. 

If you haven't renewed as yet, you may do so at the next Death Cafe, or drop off a check to the Gateway mailbox. Membership is $20 per year and is a great way to be involved in the community.

We are considering sharing our club membership list with each other so members can connect with each other after the Death Cafe, programs or films. If you do not want your contact info shared please let me know.

Contact Marley Middlebrook at marleypsyd@me.com or (925) 385-0336

Cassie Tzur, President

endoflifeconcerns@gmail.com

(925)285-4071