Greetings !
Here at Always There Home Care, we are grateful you are slowing down to read our newsletter, which is full of items that relate to home care, home health care, aging & eldercare, as well as some useful tips for daily living.
Please enjoy in the spirit of community and cooperation in which this newsletter was sent.
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Please take some time to watch our video! |
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Regina McNamara RN, MSN President & Kelly McNamara, Chief Operating Officer |
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Photos in top banner: Chase and Gary and On a sail; Ryan and Nora (Regina’s grandchildren) during Christmas; Mishelle hard at work in preschool.; Below: Darcey the guard dog All is well at the office |
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FEATURE ARTICLE
The Fine Art of Virtual Hugging
There are only four kinds of people in the world.
Those who have been caregivers.
Those who are currently caregivers.
Those who will be caregivers, and those who will need a caregiver.
Former First Lady Rosalynn Carter in the book Helping Yourself Help Others.
There is a world of difference between those of us who are (or were) family caregivers and those who have not yet joined our ranks. Note Former First Lady Rosalynn Carter’s prophetic statement above.
I feel one main difference between being a caregiver and not being a caregiver so many times is having received the proverbial telephone call received out of the blue—the call that informs us of a loved one’s accident, a wandering episode or even from the physician with the dreaded test results. We are suddenly thrust through a caregiver’s version of the “Alice in Wonderland Looking Glass” where we found ourselves unceremoniously dropped into a world of never-before felt stresses, bizarre acronyms for nearly everything, and too few sure answers to the most important questions about our loved one’s well-being.
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Photo left to right: Evelyn, all muscle, looking cute for Christmas; Caregiver Karenly’s mom Jenny and Darcey become instant friends; Darcey not at all sure about this new coat!; Chase and his friend await dad’s return.; Last 2 photos: Nancy’s wonderful dog Romeo. |
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KUDOS from KELLY
Our Everyday Heroes
Brenda Ortiz: Our company is fortunate in that most of our caregivers never actually permanently leave us. They take on a client or several, then if another assignment is not available right away, they seek out work with other companies. We totally understand this. When a caregiver leaves for a year or more, however we are often concerned they have found a permanent “home” elsewhere.
This was the case with Brenda, so it was with surprise and delight when she called two years after leaving us, wondering if there may be a client for her. It was a case of Perfect timing!
We just so happened to have A VERY special client, a lovely young woman with a complex plan of care. We had been frustrated in our attempts to find the perfect caregiver match, since nothing less would be acceptable for this very special young lady. Suddenly, out of nowhere came BRENDA!
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USING HOSPICE VOLUNTEERS DURING COVID By Barbara Karnes January 27, 2021
I was Zooming with a hospice today for Q & A’s and the subject of not being able to use volunteers because of Covid came up. WHOA!!! What do you mean you can’t use volunteers because of Covid? They are more important now than ever! We just have to use them differently.
Because of social distancing and lock downs, significant others, whether their hospice person is at home or in a nursing facility, are so very much alone.
The fear, worry, and concerns brought about by end of life situations are compounded by the isolation imposed by covid and this pandemic. Often there is limited contact and physical support from family, friends and neighbors. The primary care person/significant other is alone with their thoughts way too often and for too long. It is a very scary time.
SO the phone and your volunteers become a valuable asset to hospice care. How? Assign a volunteer to each family whether the patient is in their home or a residential care facility before the death, as soon as they come on service.
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REGINA'S REFLECTIONS
AN ENDLESS SOURCE OF
~ JOY ~
IS AT YOUR FEET...
On cold cloudless day in December 1998, I learned that my father had died. While it should not have been a shock, the phone call from my brother that day came as a sad, sudden surprise. He had been in the hospital a week, with my mother visiting daily and staying with him for 12 hours a day. Yet he died during the time she was not with him. I had just seen him two days prior. Dead ?? No. Not him. Not now. He was only in his 70s.
Sensing my grief and sorrow as do all dogs, our golden retriever Spencer, my children’s constant companion during their childhood, now mine alone, came up to me, laying her paw on my knee as if to say “I am here for you”. Holding onto her, my tears soaking her fur, she remained motionless. For as long as I needed her. As it turned out, it was quite a while.
How, I thought does anyone survive life’s challenges without a DOG???
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ONLY 3 QUESTIONS YOU NEED IN DEMENTIA CAREGIVING by Rachel Wonderlin
These are my best 3 tried-and-true questions that you need in dementia caregiving. Are you ready?
1. “Where do you think they are?”
This is the question that you’re going to use with someone who has dementia when they are talking about a loved one who has passed away. For example, perhaps your mom is saying, “Hey, where’s my dad?” You know that her father (your grandfather) died years ago, but saying, “Don’t you remember? He’s been dead for years!” is a terrible answer. Let’s figure out where her reality is so that we can embrace it! Ask her, “Where do you think he is?” and then repeat that answer back to her. For example, it may go like this:
“Where’s my dad?” / “Where do you think he is?” / “I think he’s at work.” / “That sounds right, he must be at work.”
The great thing about this answer is that it takes you completely off the hook: you don’t have to come up with anything, and you won’t accidentally give them the wrong answer! I spoke to a staff member at a local SNF recently who told me about the wrong answer she gave one of her residents. “Uhh…I think your husband is at work,” she offered. “My husband is on disability, so he doesn’t work!” the resident called back, annoyed.
If the person you are caring for believes that their loved one is dead, you can also confirm this. The trick is to always repeat their answer back to them. You can also reuse their answer, without re-asking the question, multiple times in a row!
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Photo left to right: Rosemarie and Tortilla best of friends, and a constant source of joy for each other Ryan and Nora (Regina’s Grandchildren) on the slopes. Nora’s not sure she’s ready for the big hill. Take your time little girl! You have a lifetime of skiing ahead!; Bridget former caregiver, Now APRN, and her beautiful daughters; Darcey on the trail; Nancy’s wonderful dog Romeo; Ryan intent on science book. |
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YOU LEARN AS YOU AGE!
I've Learned That:
- I like my teacher because she cries when we sing “Silent Night.” Age 5
- Our dog doesn’t want to eat my broccoli either. Age 7
- When I wave to people in the country, they stop what they are doing and wave back. Age 9
- Just when I get my room the way I like it, Mom makes me clean it up again. Age 12
- If you want to cheer yourself up, you should try cheering someone else up. Age 14
- Although it’s hard to admit it, I’m secretly glad my parents are strict with me. Age 15
- Silent company is often more healing than words of advice. Age 24
- Brushing my child’s hair is one of life’s great pleasures. Age 26
- Wherever I go, the world’s worst drivers have followed me there. Age 29
- If someone says something unkind about me, I must live so that no one will believe it. Age 30
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PROVIDERS WE LOVE
We are privileged to have received referrals from and be able to coordinate care with many Assisted Living facilities, rehab facilities, and Medicare Home Care and Hospice agencies. Our growth is in large part due to the trust the staff in these organizations have put in our caregivers. We are likewise impressed with them and we are committed to referring to them on a regular basis
- Seabury Active Living Retirement Community, and Seabury at Home, Bloomfield
- Seasons Hospice and Palliative Care, Middlebury CT
- Regional Hospice Danbury Serving CT and NY
- Farmington Valley Hospice
- McLean Home Health and Hospice
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800.348.0485 ~ We are Always There |
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