August 1, 2021 ASCF e-newsletter
Good morning Friends,
Hope you all are well. Please review this newsletter with ASCF' activities for kids, youth and parents to learn and have fun. We have information on transition, mental health stigma and more.
Check out the following article on Teaching Your Child to be Resilient. It's so important now with all the uncertainty going on. Remember, you can't stop the rain, but you can teach your child to dance in the rain.
Be well. Always here for you.
ASCF staff, 973-728-8744
PS. Drop us a line about what you would like to see here. I'd love to hear from you. Angela
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Teaching Your Child to Become Resilient
Changes and challenges – big and small – are part of life, and all children will face them at some point. While we can’t protect our children from every hurdle or disappointment they face, teaching resiliency skills to our children can help them bounce back from life’s setbacks. In addition, resiliency also has other benefits, including building confidence and the willingness to try new things.
What does it mean to be “resilient”?
Being resilient is the ability to quickly recover from setbacks, and adapt to change. It’s the ability to keep working at something, even when it’s not easy. For children, they may face big challenges such as starting a new school, bullying, or moving to a new town. They may also face every day challenges like being corrected by a teacher, not being chosen for a team, or falling off their bike. As a parent, you can help your child learn the skills they need to build their resilience through everyday parenting tips.

  • Let your child be a problem-solver and find solutions to simple problems, such as finding their shoes or getting a cup of water. Children need to learn critical thinking skills and then practice their problem­ solving. The starting point can be everyday play. Here, they are surrounded with chances to problem solve, whether they’re playing an imaginary game with their toys, building with blocks, or coloring. Giving your child choices is a first step, even for toddlers.

  • Allow for appropriate risk or age-appropriate freedoms. Life is full of risk—some serious, some mundane. We make decisions every day that involve some level of risk (“Do I buy broccoli instead of peas this week and risk that my child will spit it out in protest?”). With our children, it’s the same. Not every “risk” is obvious. Learning to ride a skateboard or climbing a tree both involve obvious, physical risk. It’s more about taking a step back to evaluate where you can give your child opportunities to challenge themselves. Maybe it’s urging them to climb up one higher branch on a tree (or climb it at all), or allowing them to get a skateboard for their birthday (Don’t forget knee/elbow pads and a helmet!)

  • Allow your child to make mistakes. Think of mistakes as learning opportunities for your child. Being there for them when they get a failing grade even though they refused to study for a test or allowing them to feel disappointment when they don’t make the softball team—these are opportunities to talk about consequences, and what they could do differently next time. Avoid being judgmental (I told you so). Instead, help your child see that the outcome might have been different if they put in more effort.

  • Encourage your child to keep trying. If the situation is beyond their skill level, build in any support they might need. A math tutor or even an older child can help them learn the skills needed to be successful or inspire them to keep going. You can share the superpower of the word “yet.” You aren’t hitting the ball “yet,” or you don’t know the words to the song “yet.” “Yet” implies they will be successful at some point, and it sometimes takes the willingness to keep on trying to make that happen.

  • Talk about emotions openly. Part of being human is feeling a wide range of emotions, from happiness and anger, to sadness and disappointment. Encourage your child to talk about their emotions and allow them to feel what they need to feel in the moment. Life seems unfair sometimes. Validate their difficult feelings and help them frame the situation in terms of what they learned.

  • Model being resilient for your child. As your child’s primary “life” teacher, use your own mistakes or challenges to show that it’s possible to bounce back from setbacks and overcome challenges. For example, “I also feel disappointed that we can’t visit Grandma this weekend. And we can call her on Saturday and talk about all the fun things we will do when we can all be together again.”
Supporting your child’s coping skills                                                                                 
 It’s natural to want to keep your children safe and to protect their feelings. But you can’t shield them from every hurt and disappointment. What you can do though, is help them learn to cope and build their resiliency skills. Bouncing back from life’s disappointments, big or small, is a life skill you can help your child learn.
This article is brought to you by Parenting Now Parenting Educators and authors Amanda Bedortha, Claire Davis and Lynne Grilley and consultant Jay Thompson Child DevelopmentFor ParentsYoung Child / By Triple P Team.
(Triple P Online is an online course for parents of children ages 2-12, comprised of 12 modules to learn different skills to help your family thrive. Information is delivered in video format with activities to customize the program to your family. If you or your child are on Oregon Health Plan (OHP) you can get Triple P Online for free.
SCIENCE CLUB FOR KIDS
Join us on Saturday, August 21 at 10 AM for a special program for children in Grades 2 through 5. This event is co-sponsored by the Highlands Family Success Center and ASCF. Andy Abdul, scientist/paleontologist and Lori, a special education science teacher, will present science activities that will encourage kids to explore and question the amazing world around them. It will be held at Highlands Success Center, 1801 Greenwood Lake Turnpike in Hewitt. This is free but registration is required.  Call 973-506-6575 to register. 
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Parents of transition-age youth
We invite you to join Maria Weber on Thursday, August 5 from 7-8 pm for an interactive Zoom meeting, “Thinking Caps and Fuzzy Slippers.” This will be a discussions about educational and job-related resources beyond high school. Please register at: [email protected]. Maria will email the Zoom link to you by Thursday morning. You can also call 973-728-8744 and leave a message.
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Calling Young Adults with Special Needs, 15-21
Join Maria at “Roll Up Your Sleeves” Activity Hour for Youth on Thursday, August 12 from 7:30 pm to 8:30 pm. Workshop will focus on discussing post-high school goals. Sessions will begin with various paths to take after high school, including college, trade school, job/career opportunities, volunteerism, and self-employment and how to achieve these goals. Activities may include practicing interviewing skills, writing resumes, and completing mock applications. Registration of teen/young adult is also required.     [email protected] 
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Resources
 Advocacy Correction
In our last newsletter we included SPAN in our Resource list with their old web address. Below is the corrected one. We apologize for the error.
Statewide Parent Advocacy Network, Inc. - serving the families of New Jersey
The Mission of the Statewide Parent Advocacy Network is to empower families and inform and involve professionals and other individuals interested in the healthy development and educational rights of children. Through this collaboration, all children will become fully participating and contributing members of our communities and society. SPAN is a non-profit educational and advocacy center for parents of children from birth to 21 years of age.
 
Mental Health
Mental Health Matters
Mental Health Matters was founded to supply information and resources to mental health consumers, professionals, students, and supporters. While the percentage of people facing challenges in their mental health is large, the resources available are often confusing and often times not evidence based. Our library of articles are determined by evidence-based research and peer reviewed scholarly articles while being written/reviewed by healthcare professionals and industry experts in a way that is understandable and accurate.
Mental Health Matters has been an online resource for mental health for 20+ years. We continue to produce original content and update existing articles all based on publications of new evidence-based research.
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LUNCH and LEARN
Join the meeting on August 5th @ Noon 
 Topic: Parenting Tips for Guiding & Empowering Special Needs Young Adults
Discussion will provide insights and helpful tips on guiding and empowering special needs youth as they journey through the teen years. The presentation will cover: 
o    Achieving independence and Self-Determination
o    Attention and support
o    Clear rules and responsibility
o   Teaching self-advocacy skills
o   Managing conflict
o   IEPs, Diagnosis, similarities and differences
o   Life Skills
o   Letting go- Supports in the Adult World
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Webinar
NJCTS presents
How Can DVRS Work for You?
Thursday, August 12   at 3 pm
Facilitated by Helene Simms, M.Ed., CRC, LRC, CPM
The New Jersey Division of Vocational and Rehabilitation Services (DVRS) provides the services individuals with physical, mental, cognitive or other forms of disabilities require for identifying and securing employment that fits their strengths, priorities, needs, and capabilities. In this important session, you will learn about the types of services available for adults and teens, find out who is eligible, the process involved, and the benefits of using DVRS, and more. Understanding how DVRS can work for you can lead to successful employment outcomes.
Please register:
https://us02web.zoom.us/meeting/register/tZUrc-mgrDstEtdOX2Emn5KZwWbN-Hub1-w-
Healthy Body, Healthy Mind Wellness Day
September 11, 2021 Garret Mountain Reservation
The HBHM Wellness Day is a day to bring awareness and decrease the stigma associated with mental health. The day consists of music, entertainment and fun filled activities for youth and families in Passaic and Hudson Counties. The day gives families a chance to network with one another and shine a positive light on youth that may be experiencing emotional and behavioral challenges as well as intellectual and developmental disabilities. One of the highlights of the event is our Community Resource Fair consisting of various service providers and advocacy groups from multiple counties that have informational tables set up with brochures and giveaways.
For more information, please contact: Paulina Dutton, Community Resource Development Manager 973-406-9028/[email protected] Michelle Brett Community Resource Specialist, 973-406-9027/[email protected]
MOM Squad
August 12th @ 6 pm  
What Parents Need to Know About Self-Injury
Many adolescents who self-injure do so in secrecy and may even put on a happy face around others. When caregivers notice cut or burn marks on arms, legs, or the abdomen; discover hidden razors, knives, other sharp objects; or notice their youth wearing clothing inappropriate for the weather, such as long sleeves or pants in hot weather; it could be an indication that something is wrong. On Thursday evening, August 12th at 6 pm Dana Brodhecker, MA, LAC with the Center for Evaluation and Counseling, Inc. (CEC), will explain causes and risk factors of self-injury, how to know if your child is self-injuring, and how best to approach them if they are. Brodhecker will also provide tips on how to support your child if they are self-injurious.
Mom Squad Support Group
Thursday, August 5 from 6 - 7 PM
Share the joys and challenges of raising a child or children with special needs in a positive, supportive environment focused around your concerns. Julie from ASCF and Diana Varga, from Family Partners facilitate.
Registration: Copy and paste
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Children Learn What They Live
If children live with criticism, they learn to condemn.
If children live with hostility, they learn to fight.
If children live with fear, they learn to be apprehensive.
If children live with pity, they learn to feel sorry for themselves.
If children live with ridicule, they learn to feel shy.
If children live with jealousy, they learn to feel envy.
If children live with shame, they learn to feel guilty.
If children live with encouragement, they learn confidence.
If children live with tolerance, they learn patience.
If children live with praise, they learn appreciation.
If children live with acceptance, they learn to love.
If children live with approval, they learn to like themselves.
If children live with recognition, they learn it is good to have a goal.
If children live with sharing, they learn generosity.
If children live with honesty, they learn truthfulness.
If children live with fairness, they learn justice.
If children live with kindness and consideration, they learn respect.
If children live with security, they learn to have faith in themselves and in those about them.
If children live with friendliness, they learn the world is a nice place in which to live.
Copyright © 1972 by Dorothy Law Nolte
Support Group
Join other parents at our
FSO of Passaic County and ASCF
Support Group
Tuesdays, August 10,17,24,31 from 6:30-8 pm
ALL WELCOME.
Register with Nina 973-979-0508
THOUGHTS TO PONDER
Keep your sense of humor. 
Certain things others do or say may get under our skin that we can't help, but we don't have to overreact to them. If you become overly sensitive to what may be innocent comments, people start to avoid your company. Try to remember that people are not making these comments to offend or upset you so try not to take it personally.
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Endless Possibilities 2021:
Successful Transitions | Virtual Conference
Friday, August 6, 2021 | 9:00 - 4:00 EST
Conference for educators, parents, and others to gain information related to special education, family supports and mental health. Sponsored by WI FACETS - Wisconsin Family Assistance Center for Education, Training & Support, Wisconsin Department of Public Instruction, UW-Whitewater and Southern Regional Center - CYSHCN.
Limited to 400 registrants.
 For more info go to https://www.uww.edu/ce/endlesspossibilitiesconference
DISCLAIMER: The Association for Special Children and Families does not provide or give Legal or Medical advice.
DESCARGO DE RESPONSABILIDAD: La Asociación para Niños y Familias Especiales no proporciona ni brinda asesoramiento legal o médico.