Perceiving the world through a filter like this reduces the stress of having unrealistic expectations and promotes the open mindedness, flexibility and resiliency that enables living optimally in any situation. 

Add-on's and Alternatives
Some models add the belief that there are multiple lifetimes effected by the way we behave in prior lifetimes.  

Some say that there is an absolute, boundless realm of clarity and emptiness that is the ground within which the illusion of the world of self and other arises.  
Some believe in afterlife, heaven, hell and a higher power that directs, guides, judges, rewards and punishes.  

Your Model
What is your overriding model, your belief system?

Does it guide you towards peace, happiness, compassion, and skillful action?

Do you think you don’t have one? You might be surprised to find that there is one that subconsciously influences the way you think, speak and act.

Is your model one you simply absorbed from parents and culture?  

Is it open to question and change?  

Is it effective? Does it work toward freeing you of mental slavery so you can be creatively responsive?  

Is it in-sync with reality? Does it rely on your personal experience, moderated by constant reality checking?  
How to be Happy Even When You Are Sad, Mad or Scared:

How to be happy...How to be Happy Even When You Are Sad, Mad or Scared is available on It is a book for children of all ages (including those in adult bodies). Buy it for the children in your life so they can be better able to “feel and deal” - feel and accept their emotions and deal with them in a way that avoids being driven by them. You can order the book at
Performance and Open-minded Mindfulness
Open-minded: questioning everything, accepting diversity and uncertainty. 
Mindful: consciously aware; concentrated. 

Foundation for blending process, project, engagement and knowledge management into a cohesive approach to optimize performance.
By George Pitagorsky

Success is measured in how well and how regularly you meet expectations. But what exactly are expectations, and how do you effectively manage them when multiple priorities and personalities are involved?
Using the case study of a Project Manager coordinating an organizational transition, this Managing Expectations book explores how to apply a mindful, compassionate, and practical approach to satisfying expectations in any situation. George Pitagorsky describes how to make sure expectations are rational, mutually understood, and accepted by all those with a stake in the project. This process relies on blending a crisp analytical approach with the interpersonal skills needed to negotiate win-win understandings of what is supposed to be delivered, by when, for how much, by who, and under what conditions.

Managing Conflict in Projects
By George Pitagorsky

Managing Conflict in Projects: Applying Mindfulness and Analysis for Optimal Results by George Pitagorsky charts a course for identifying and dealing with conflict in a project context.

Pitagorsky states up front that conflict management is not a cookbook solution to disagreement-a set of prescribed actions to be applied in all situations. His overall approach seeks to balance two aspects of conflict management: analysis based on a codified process and people-centered behavioral skills.

The book differentiates conflict resolution and conflict management. Management goes beyond resolution to include relationship building that may serve to avoid conflict or facilitate resolution if it occurs.
The Zen Approach to Project Management 
By George Pitagorsky

Projects are often more complex and stressful than they need to be. Far too many of them fail to meet expectations. There are far too many conflicts. There are too few moments of joy and too much anxiety. But there is hope. It is possible to remove the unnecessary stress and complexity. This book is about how to do just that. It links the essential principles and techniques of managing projects to a "wisdom" approach for working with complex, people-based activities.