(320) 258-7611 www.getfullyengaged.com
July 2019 Quarterly Newsletter
Fully Engaged is committed to serving parishes and the facilitators in their mission to provide quality marriage preparation and formation for the engaged couples they minister to. This is the first of a quarterly newsletter to enhance this ministry.

Our goal is to share tips, tools, new materials, and current articles/media on marriage that will aid Fully Engaged Facilitators in their work. Please share this with the other mentors in your parish. You may also wish to share the email addresses of mentor couples with us so they can receive future editions directly. Send email addresses to Chris Codden at ccodden@gw.stcdio.org.
New Catholic Identity Supplement
In our work with engaged couples, discussing their participation in the sacraments of Eucharist and Reconciliation, we continually here comments, such as, "It's been so long, I don't even know what to do when I go into the confessional." or "We are so busy. It's hard to get to Mass." or "We've just moved, and haven't joined a parish yet." While the Couple's Workbook addresses these topics, the rubrics were not included. To aid you in your discussion with the engaged couple, we developed the Catholic Identity Supplement. This is a good resource to give the couple as homework before you discuss the "Catholic Identity" section.

Click here to download our newest resource from our website.

The additional resources listed on the back page of the supplement are also listed on a new page on our website: http://www.getfullyengaged.com/engaged-couples-resources/ This page also has the Financial and Infertility & Adoption Supplements and links.

All three supplements are available online to download for free or they may be purchased in packs of 10 for $10. To order, log in and click on ‘Order Materials’ in the upper right corner of your Parish Page. Materials can be ordered 24/7.
Addressing the topic of Cohabitation
Fully Engaged Statemen t
# 46.    I understand why the Catholic Church teaches that living together before marriage is unacceptable.  (Yes)
I have heard from some mentor couples, one of the hardest discussions for them is on the topic of cohabitation. This may be because many engaged couples feel society has so normalized cohabitation, that the Church must follow. For us as mentors, it is important to take this opportunity to address with the couple why not only the Church, but empirical data finds living together before marriage problematic and our desire for them to have a happy and holy marriage.
While discussing the Church's views on marriage as a holy and sacred union can be difficult, it is a beautiful message of hope and one that couples rarely hear. Our job, then, is to share with the couple the concerns we have about cohabitation and that living under one roof and sharing the gift of sexuality is to be reserved for marriage, for it is the only place it can find its full meaning.  It is only after stating that they are free to marry and vow their willingness to enter into a permanent, committed, faithful love, that the treasures of intimacy can be realized.

That is why the Church wants to ensure a individual's freedom. So must so, that the first Intention the couple will agree to before they state their vows during the Rite of Marriage is:
  N. and N. , have you come here to enter into Marriage, without coercion, freely and wholeheartedly?
The statement of true freedom to marry is also of grave concern when a couple is cohabiting. Does the couple truly have the freedom to say “yes” to marriage, if their lives are so entangled financially and emotionally? Family pressure, pressure from their partner, and concern over the length of time and energy that has been given to the relationship may all be contributing factors that hamper a person’s freedom. It is important to ask the couple if they are free to say “no” to marriage. It is only when they have the freedom to say “no,” they have the freedom to say “yes.”

Later in the Couple's Workbook on page 17 in the section on "Intimacy," the confidential pledge to chastity is offered. While talking about cohabitation, this is a good time to bring that up for their review and to mention you will be discussing it at a later meeting.

Challenging couple's to reflect and reconsider decisions they have made in the past is always good and healthy. When a challenge is offered out of love and compassion, the results can be fruitful and appreciated. It is our duty to help couple's in their formation for the sacrament to provide them ample opportunities to discern how they can apply the wisdom of Christ and His Church to lead a lasting and faithful commitment in the bonds of Holy Matrimony.
The following resources on this topic are available at: http://www.getfullyengaged.com/facilitators/additional-resources/

Other articles on Cohabitation:
10 Must-Haves Your Marriage Can’t Live Without from Marriage Today
Many of us go CRAZY to get that important item that we just can’t live without. The television tells us. Social media shows us. It’s up close and in our faces. These kind of must-haves are just things that will without a doubt be replaced by the next, hottest must-have item next month. There are certainly some must-haves for our marriage too. However, these things aren’t anything money can buy, and they can’t be replaced by the next best thing. They are eternal and necessary, and our marriage can’t live without them.
Angelus Address:
On the Miracle at the Wedding of Cana, ‘Do Whatever He Tells You’
from Zenit January 20, 2019
Last Sunday, with the feast of the Baptism of the Lord, we began the journey of “Ordinary” Liturgical Time, the Time in which to follow Jesus in His public life, in the mission for which the Father sent Him into the world. In today’s Gospel (Cf. John 2:1-11) we find the account of Jesus’ first miracle. The first of these miraculous signs is carried out in the village of Cana in Galilee, during a wedding celebration. It’s no accident that placed, at the beginning of Jesus’ public life, is a nuptial ceremony, because in Him God has married humanity. This is the Good News, even if those who invited Him didn’t know yet that the Son of God was seated at their table and that He is the true Groom. In fact, the whole mystery of the sign of Cana is founded on the presence of this Divine Groom, Jesus, who begins to reveal Himself. Jesus manifests Himself as the Groom of the People of God, proclaimed by the prophets, and it reveals to us the depth of the relationship that unites us to Him: it’s a new Covenant of love.
Reminder: If you are moving to a different parish or there is a change in employees who receive information from Fully Engaged, please call us so we can update your account.
Want to save Shipping costs?
The USPS offers a reduced rate for mailing packages with workbooks, manuals, etc. called "Media Mail."

Media Mail  is a cost-effective way to send non time sensitive media  materials through the U.S. Postal Service as long as the package weighs less than 70 pounds. This method will take longer to arrive, within in 8 to 10 days. So if you would like to use the media mail option (it can save as much as half the regular cost), in the lower left hand corner of the Material Order Form, in the box titled "Order Placed By", put your name and "Media Mail".
Starting July 1st
We have received many requests to include the invoice in with the packages shipped. So effective July 1st, the invoice will be included with your shipment. If you have scoring fees that have not been previously billed, they will also appear on the invoice.
Thank you for your commitment to forming couples for the Sacrament of Holy Matrimony.
Have questions, or ideas for up-coming newsletters, please let us know. You can contact Chris at ccodden@gw.stcdio.org or Jill at jill.svihel@gw.stcdio.org or call the office at (320) 258-7611.