Who Is the Nikki in Your Church?

Do you remember Nikki, the young lady I talked about in my assembly report?

One Sunday after worship, she asked if she could talk with me. She came into my office, sat down, and said, “Pastor, something is going on in me, and I don’t really know what it is. God brought me out of all that mess. He gave me a whole new family. I have friends now. People who love me. But why? What am I supposed to do with all of this? It feels like He had to have a reason.”

I said, “Nikki, it sounds to me like God may be helping you discover what you are here to do. What do you think keeps pulling at your heart?”

She answered almost immediately. “I think it has something to do with young girls who have been displaced from their homes.”

Of course it did.

Nikki knew what it felt like to be displaced. She knew what it was like to feel forgotten, overlooked, and unsure where she belonged. Now she was beginning to notice young women walking through some of the same things.

I want to be careful with that. I do not believe God hurt Nikki so He could give her a ministry later. Pain does not automatically become a calling. But God was doing something with the life she had lived. The very experiences that once made her feel like she had nothing to offer were helping her recognize people who needed someone like her.

And that is where something important happened.

Nikki had been helped. She had found people who loved her. She had found a church family. She was growing. But somewhere along the way another question started bothering her.

Now what?

That may be one of the most important questions we can help people answer.

The People Already Sitting in Our Churches

Pastor, look around your church this Sunday.

Really look.

There may be a woman sitting there who would be a wonderful Bible teacher, but nobody has ever asked her. There may be a man who can walk into a mess, organize it, and make things work. Somebody in the back may have an incredible ability to sit with hurting people. There may be a teenager who has leadership written all over him, an older person with decades of wisdom, a business owner who understands money and leadership, or a mechanic who can fix just about anything.

And we may have no idea.



Sometimes I wonder how much ability is sitting in our churches every Sunday while the same handful of people do almost everything.

Paul said there are different gifts, but the same Spirit gives them, and those gifts are given “for the common good” (1 Corinthians 12:4, 7). In other words, God has placed something in His people that can help somebody else.

I do not think most churches have a people problem. I think we may have a discovery problem.

For years, we built churches around a pastor and a few dependable people. The pastor preached, prayed, visited, recruited volunteers, solved problems, and tried to keep everything moving. Then the same faithful people filled whatever jobs were left.

Everybody else watched.

Nobody planned it that way. It just happened.

Eventually, the faithful few got tired, and everybody else began to assume that ministry was something pastors and really committed church people did.

But Paul gives us a different picture. Ephesians 4:12 says church leaders are supposed to prepare God’s people “for works of service.”

That means my job as a pastor is not to do everything.

My job is to help other people discover what God can do through them.

Your Calling May Have Nothing to Do With Sunday Morning

We can also make another mistake. We can make people think that serving God always means filling a position at church.

You are friendly? We need greeters.

You are organized? We have a spreadsheet for you.

You like children? Wonderful. The nursery needs help.

There is nothing wrong with any of those things. We need people serving in the church. But surely God’s purpose for someone’s life is bigger than helping us fill next month’s volunteer schedule.

A teacher can serve Jesus in a classroom. A nurse can care for people in a hospital. A contractor can run an honest business and pour into younger workers. A parent can shape the faith of children around the dinner table. A retired person can invest in somebody younger. A good neighbor can become the person everyone on the street knows they can turn to.

All of that matters to God.

So maybe we need to change the question.

Instead of asking, “Where can we use this person?” maybe we should ask, “What has God put in this person, and how can we help them use it?”

That is a very different conversation.

Sometimes the answer will be serving at church. Sometimes it will happen at work. Sometimes it will be in a school, a neighborhood, a ball field, a hospital, or somebody’s living room. Sometimes it may become a ministry nobody has thought of yet.

The goal is not simply to get more volunteers.

The goal is to help people discover that God can use their life.

Maybe We Helped Create the Problem

Church leaders sometimes complain that people have become consumers. They come to church, sit down, receive what is offered, and go home.

That certainly happens.

But I think we need to ask ourselves a harder question.

Did we teach them to do that?

Did we work so hard to create a good Sunday service that we forgot to show people what comes next? Did we talk about spiritual gifts but never sit down and help anyone discover theirs? Did we only ask people to serve when we were desperate to fill a position? Did we keep asking the same dependable people until they were exhausted?

And maybe worst of all, did we unintentionally give people the idea that the most important ministry happens on a platform?

People do not stop being consumers because we fuss at them.

They change when somebody helps them see that they have something to give.

That was happening with Nikki.

She did not walk into my office with a ministry plan. She did not have a name, a logo, a budget, or a five-year strategy.

She just knew she cared deeply about girls who had been displaced from their homes.

That was enough to start a conversation.

We did not immediately put her in charge of something. That would not have been wise. Passion matters, but so do maturity, preparation, healthy boundaries, and good leadership.

So we listened.

We helped her think through what she was feeling. We paid attention to the things she did well. We connected her with people who knew more than she did. We gave her opportunities to help and learn.

And little by little, things started making sense.

At some point Nikki stopped seeing herself only as the person who had once needed help.

She started becoming the person who could help somebody else.

That is the whole idea.

Who Is Your Nikki?

Pastor, I am convinced there are people sitting in your church right now who have far more to offer than either they or you realize.

Some have never been asked.

Some tried serving years ago and had a bad experience.

Some are scared.

Some need training.

Some are simply waiting for somebody to notice them.

And some are already doing incredible things in their homes, workplaces, schools, and communities, but nobody has ever helped them understand that what they are doing matters to God.

So here is my challenge.

Find one person.

Not ten. One.

Find somebody who comes faithfully but still seems to be standing on the edge of things. Sit down with them. Buy them coffee. Ask about their life.

Do not start with, “We need somebody to help in the nursery.”

Start with questions like these:

“What kinds of people or needs do you naturally notice?”

“When have you felt like you were really making a difference for somebody?”

“What do people usually ask you to help them with?”

“What is something you would love to learn or try?”

Then listen.

You may discover something neither of you expected.

And before that conversation ends, help them take one next step.

One person. One conversation. One next step.

That is how it starts.

So, Pastor, who is the Nikki in your church?