“There is so much more going on than you can know or even imagine.” The refrain visited me, as it had in the past, after a restless night of wondering. I knew it to be true, for it had been true before. I surrendered myself to the arms of not-knowing and felt the sure embrace of the “much more” that is not mine to know but is mine to live. 

Perhaps you, too, have had times of such surrender, times when all you really knew was that you could not know, but that it was somehow sufficient, for you were only part of a larger whole. That larger whole was important and your role in that was important, despite the understanding that eluded you. For, our need to know is not, after all, the ultimate objective. I wonder sometimes if the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil somehow represented our obsession with this need-to-know. In the parlance of our times, “it’s not about you.” I, for one, need to be reminded from time to time.

On the other side of surrender are glimmers, serendipitous moments that allow us to glimpse the bigger picture. Frederick Buechner called them “signposts along the way, indications that we are, after all, on the right path, that something more is going on.”  

Last week I went for a mid-afternoon walk on one of those first days after the arctic freeze. The return to normal temps felt surprisingly warm and the air smelled of earth, moist and brown. Along a stretch that skirted the edge of the forest, my friend drew my attention to a deer camouflaged in the bare trees and leaves. We avoided a direct stare lest we threaten her, but sideways glances confirmed that something odd was going on. Her head was low to the ground, but her back end was high in the air.   We wondered if she was in distress or hurt but her solemn, unblinking eyes revealed no alarm as she eyed us pass slowly by. We’d gone perhaps a hundred yards when my companion stopped and said, “I think she’s giving birth!” We knew it to be true even before the wonder of Google confirmed it with actual videos of does giving birth, as can happen this time of year in Arkansas.

I do not know if deer are one of those species that can actually delay birth when the weather is extreme, but I have learned that some animals can. How different would this fawn’s introduction to the world have been just a day or two sooner. Somehow, we felt confident that this new child of the forest would be cared for and thrive under the watchful, wise care of its mother. We will be looking on future walks for a newborn fawn or, more likely, two. We will probably debate whether the ones we see are “our” babies. I do know that whenever I see them, I will be renewed in wonder and in the realization that there is so much more going on…

So often it is our way of knowing that shifts rather than the information we hold. The way we see the world, the way, even, that we see ourselves, can be transformed without our expectation. The week before Christmas, the barista/owner of The Coffee Container, surprised us with a gift. It was a picture she'd painted of us, or at least of us as she saw us. My husband and I visit regularly and we reminded her, she said, of Carl and Ellie in the movie, UP--just two people who found each other young, stayed together through the years, and made a good and happy life together. Really? That was what she saw in us? I didn't remember it as being that simple. I had not seen what she saw, but, truthfully, who's to say which vision is more accurate?

We hung the picture in our bedroom. Remember the old adage, "Lord, help me to be the person my dog thinks I am"? I look at the picture each morning and pray, "Lord, help us to be what Jolene seems to think we are." She gave us so much more than a picture. She gave us a new way of seeing and a new way of being.

The theologian, Karl Rahner, advised that the most important task of a Christian is to be aware. Glimmers and gifts, signposts along the way, messages in the night. God is preaching to us all the time, without the need of words.

May you walk into this new year aware, paying attention, and so be graced and surprised with God's wordless encouragement and silent companionship as you go.

ASH WEDNESDAY - SIX WEEKS FROM TODAY

February 22nd, 42 days from today, LENT begins! We have as much time between now and then as we will have in Lent itself. If you are involved in a Faith Community using this time to plan for Lent, please consider contacting me for resources. I already have some Lent bookings so it would be good to reach out now.*

WITNESSES ON THE WAY

An Interactive Stations of the Cross

another Zoom collaboration with St. Placid Priory, Lacey, WA

Saturday, March 25th

9 am to 2 pm

Come prepare for the upcoming Holy Week through the eyes of those who were there– the Witnesses on the Way. Through scripture, reflection, music, and prayer, we will creatively recreate the Stations of the Cross and the stories leading up to them.

Cost: $55. For more information, go to: The Priory

* I am not available for Lenten booking Saturday, March 18th as I will be leading a Zoom retreat for The Fellowship of Catholic Christian Women. FCCW has chosen my second book, NEVER ON SUNDAY, for their group read 2022-23. It has been my great delight to partner with them and I look forward to this extended opportunity to spend more time with them. Our theme for the day will be

I FIRST MET HIM IN MY EMPTINESS

An Invitation to Journey with Jesus to Jerusalem.

In the Fellowship of Catholic Christian Women, English-speaking and Spanish-speaking women gather from 25 different Catholic parishes in four states to build community and share the Gospel of Jesus Christ. To learn more, go to FCCW

If you happen to be located in the Bella Vista, AR area, you are welcome to join with the good folks at United Lutheran, Bella Vista as I use my book, NEVER ON SUNDAY, to lead Adult Education Sunday mornings, 10:45-11:45 through April 23rd. 100 Cooper Road, Bella Vista, 479-855-1325.

To get a hold of me about Lent or Easter events or ideas, you can reach me at my email.

If you are brand new to Sisters in Scripture, I would love to have you stay in touch. To get regular emails, sign up here 

You can also also learn more about Kathleen and Sisters in Scripture at our website