One of my favorite people yelled this down the hall as I schlepped to her Saturday yoga class. Mary is one of those girls everyone likes, and yet she was genuinely happy to see me, excited I was there among all the other sweaty folk. (She even hopped a little.)
Really, this made me tingle, that my presence would matter to her. In our Private Mode culture, with its swipe-left-for-NO, one-click anonymity, it feels so good to be openly accepted, invited, loved.
Especially living with teenagers, stellar though they are, sometimes I feel like a fifth wheel. My kids are growing up, and don't need (or particularly want) Mom around to oversee their comings and goings.
If I'm not careful, I find myself thinking more about the people/attention/time that I lack more than who/what I DO have.
"Why didn't they answer my text?"
"Why am I always the one doing the asking?"
"Why didn't they want my opinion?"
"Why wasn't I invited?"
"Why don't I matter?"
It snowballs, this worrisome wondering. And pretty soon, we're putting words in peoples' mouths, assuming the worst. Taking offense when none was intended. Creating drama and discord that no one needs.
These are the mental habits of chronically angry, resentful and lonely people. Please, let's not be that. Me included. Life. Is. Hard. Enough.
The truth is, we've all been "too busy", preoccupied with back-to-school doings, distracted by bills and earning the money to pay them, crawling with chores and obligations, just wanting a blessed breath. Remember that?
If you're feeling like I am, this month, let's release our focus on lack, and commit to noticing and openly appreciating the people in our lives who DO have a some space and time right now, and who choose to share that free time with us. Maybe they could use a little attention themselves?
Who would pick up on the first ring to get a call from you?
Who needs to be taken to a long lunch, with dessert?
Whose day would be made by a card and handwritten note?
Who would see you coming their way and say,
"You picked me!"