Just after dinner I received this message on my Facebook wall.
It was from the person who put the comment on the page and inadvertently triggered our first group controversy (Sexist-Comment-Clickbait-Gate).
When I saw the apology I quickly deleted the comment (because I didn't want him to be skinned alive online) and told him that I forgave him. He responded with a "Bless You!"
As much as I hate to admit that The Grouch (AKA James) was right, but his gut told him that this guy didn't mean anything by the comment.
And after talking to him, not only was there zero malice, but his comment actually came from a place of curiosity.
We continued to talk about what's going on with his trumpet playing and I have to say, I'm genuinely happy to have him in the group. He has my cloak of protection.
No, he did not get an advanced degree in gender studies, and his question did not pass the PC charisma test. But he wasn't trying to hurt anyone and he showed me respect by coming out of hiding and owning up to it in a humble way.
And after we hugged it out and made up I can't say that he did anything wrong.
Not everyone in the group is going to say things in the most smooth and sophisticated way.
In fact, there are many who are learning English as a second language and they may be struggling to express themselves.
We can't expect everyone to agree with us right away. And sometimes people will come out with views that are going to annoy or infuriate us. But we are going to talk about it and discuss it and try to bring it back to the topic at hand, which is building ourselves up as better trumpet players and creating opportunities for ourselves.
There are people right now who are whispering and PMing and posting about how awful James and I are and that we are somehow immoral. Those people can think what they want (... and take a pill for good measure). I may lose my temper at times, but I do not make snap judgements about people and I am willing to forgive.
I am here to serve you and help you reach your goals in any way that I can.