Issue 357 - Here I Am!

April 2026

Most afternoons, we sit down together for a cup of coffee and some brief devotional reading. Last week, we began reading Life Lessons from the Monastery by Jerome Kodell, OSB. In short chapters with simple words, he explores deep truths. The chapter entitled “Here I Am!” prompted these reflections.

Hineni

Jerome Kodell in Life Lessons writes reflective essays that are, for him, "probes into the spiritual journey." It's not a coincidence that he begins the series of short essays about the call to a spiritual life. He mentions that the call comes from God and also to God.


In Scripture we read responses to God's call. Abraham answers, "Hineni, Here I am!" (Genesis 22:1). Moses answers immediately: "Hineni! Here I am!" (Exodus3:4). Isaiah cries out: Hineni! Send me! (Isa 6:8).


Abbot Jerome goes on to write: "The spontaneous response of a faithful disciple reechoes in the Bible, and it is wonderful and thrilling to hear. But ever more wonderful is Hineni when God says it to us." Kodell adds, "What could be more comforting and consoling in my distress than to know that the God of the universe is with me?"


Comforting and consoling? –maybe more like daunting or terrifying? -or like Maya Angelou felt when she read and realized that God loves her: "That knowledge humbles me, melts my bones, closes my ears, and makes my teeth rock loosely in their gums. And it also liberates me."


It's near impossible to put into words what it would be like if – or when – you feel God's presence close to you and you hear the soft, gentle words, "Hineni! Here I Am."


In fact, Kodell notes that "God says to us continually, 'Hineni, here I am, I love you,' and he passes his message along through his children. We are the lifeline for one another."


Bring to your memory a person – a lifeline – who was near you and whose presence was comforting and consoling. Cherish that moment again. Maybe there was only a presence; no words.


I remember my cousin Larry coming from Dallas to Corpus Christi in 1990, within hours of my mother dying during heart bypass surgery, to be with my Daddy and me. I remember none of the details, except that he sat there silently. The memory of his consoling and comforting presence will remain always with me.


When I meditate, I often am consoled by the words in Scripture: "Remain in me, as I remain in you."* And I pray that I might be a comforting and consoling presence to someone distressed and who needs a silent presence. Or a lifeline, like Larry.


I pray, "May I be strengthened like Abraham and Moses and Isaiah to answer, Hineni, Here I Am!"

--Jan

*John 15:4

The Best Promise

When I was a child playing hide and seek, the one who was “It” would close their eyes and count aloud to some specified number while all the others hid. Then, opening his or her eyes, the seeker would cry out, “Here I come, ready or not!” to announce that the search had begun.


That was a warning. But when God announces, “Here I am,” that is a promise. God is with us. God is here for us. As Kodell puts it, God promises, “Here I am. I am with you. Here is my Son. He loves you so much that he died for you.” This is wonderful news: “Not a distant God, but a God who cares, who loves us, who wants to be with us.”


This does not mean there will be no trouble. It does mean God journeys with us through the trouble, abides with us in the trouble. God promises, “I am here for you.”


In recent days, filled with wars and greed and downright meanness, I have been thinking of the words of Corrie ten Boom, who survived a Nazi concentration camp during World War II. “There is no pit so deep,” she bore witness, “that God’s love is not deeper still.”


In this season of resurrection, let us remember the disciples on the road to Emmaus and Mary at the empty tomb. They thought that their hopes had been dashed. They thought that God had abandoned them. But the risen Christ surprised them and walked with them through their grief.


May the risen Christ surprise us, too – “Here I am, ready or not!”

--by Bill

Photo by Sebastian Dumitru on Unsplash

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Bill Howden and Jan Davis
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