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How To Handle Curve Balls #TakeAction
Dec. 6, 2018
by CathyHarrisInternational.com, Syndicated Columnist
You guys know that I have allowed my life to become somewhat of a teaching or learning lesson for you - my listening and reading audience.
So therefore, let me tell you the truth about two recent #CurveBalls that happened to me and how I was able to pick myself up by the #BootStrap, put one leg in front of the other and keep moving.
But first let's go deeper into what exactly are
#CurveBalls. Curve Balls
could be the loss of a loved one through death or a break up (or divorce) -- loss of a house or job, and the loss of your health.
Growing Up Resilient - #StillIRise
My first #CurveBall was being born the family's #BlackSheep child with 8 other siblings;
forced out of my home at age 17 after I graduated high school with no family support; ended up in the military where I experienced sexual harassment from high ranking sergeants; then ended up working for the federal government for over 20 years, where I experienced over 11 years of
The message, #StillIRise from #MayaAngelou (#MyGreatestMentor) is about the resiliency, strength, and beauty that black communities continue to show through hundreds of years of oppression and discrimination.
The theme of "Still I Rise" is also about self respect, and confidence. In the poem, she reveals how she will overcome anything with her self-esteem. She shows how nothing can get her down.
How To Successfully Deal With #CurveBalls
Let me let you in on a
that I learned a long and
ago. Many times when people experience
, they become
. But what you need to understand is that
and there is some type of action -- for every type of fear.
If you are afraid after experiencing a #CurveBall (a death, break-up/divorce, loss of a house or job or a sickness) then just keep moving - keep walking through the fear and eventually that fear will turn into #Enthusiasm and #Joy.
Why Cathy Harris Exist
in their lives, especially women. Some can be worse than others and these
will come and go as you
in your life.
, my own reasoning for
existing is to teach my
, women ages 30-60, how to deal with
so passionate about helping others get over
#Heartbreaks, whether they come from the opposite sex or simply from trying to
in this paradise called
#Life. My goal is to help you find your way back to
An Old #CurveBall (#LossOfHealth)
Many of you have heard me talk about how I
and became a
--12 years ago, when I found myself
It has to be one of the most
that I ever experienced in my life. T
hat was a major
that was thrown at me and it lasted for months, until I realized I was the cause of my ailment and I had to be the cure.
If you are serious about being healthy read the 12 Chapters in the book, which are 12 #ActionSteps. It's the #BestBook out of my 26 non-fiction books,
including my 6 health books arsenal of knowledge.
#WorkplaceCurveBall - #TakeAction
Not everyone can become a
so for many
(#SingleMothers), learn everything you can about how workplaces work.
The goal is to have enough information in your
, so when something
happens to you in your workplace or life, you can
, instead of checking out of society in
type of #DepressiveState.
This is easier said than done because we all know people, especially women, who have
have experienced in their lives.
I saw it
when I worked for the
for over 20 years and became an
Some of the women who
to this day have never recovered.
Some are still to this day, confined to their homes, unable to function in this society. Remember
#WorkplaceAbuse can be just as
and women experience in the military during
. There is no difference!
nd I know several women who have been raped and sexually assaulted and can no longer function as #FunctioningMembers of society.
My First #CurveBall - A "Relationship Break-Up"
Firstly, six months before I left my last relationship in September 2018, in Austin, Texas, I knew I wanted out!
Breakups are never easy, however, everyday as I got out of bed, I would #TakeActionSteps by #PlanningMyMove to another state and even started purging my life of things.
I admit because I had lived with such a #MaterialisticMate for over 3 years, I too had accumulated things I just did not need. So I ended up throwing stuff away (even books), however, under different circumstances, I would have kept these items.
I ended up leaving with what was on my back and what would fit in my car. The same way I arrived.
Because I did not want this man to know the city I had relocated to, he did forward several boxes that just would not fit in my car to the home of a relative in another city.
Initially, I could not leave because of my
to finishing up my
"One Year Gardening Journey"
it for my family and audience, so when I completed the journey, I packed up and left my old city.
So the #FirstCurveBall
. Many people handle breakups differently. For some they agree to stay in the same household and just be friends.
Sometimes they take these steps because of finances, or they just don't have any clarity or direction yet.
Many others after a #Breakup just move out of the house to a place in the same city or the next city over or even move in with relatives. But for me, I wanted and needed #Distance and #Solitude.
If you know you need to leave a relationship and can't do it on your own, get a family member or friend to help you go over the #Pros and #Cons of whether you should stay or go or help walk you through the process of
For me, my #YoungestDaughter helped me think clearly about leaving my mate. It wasn't just the relationship, but I just felt I had outgrown the area.
I found the weather to be very problematic with the extremely hot temperatures in the summer months, living in a rural area in a #FoodDesert and not making the types of
friendships that I really desired as I reached further into my #GoldenYears.
She had witnessed me first-hand complain about these things the entire time I lived in the area so she knew I needed a change.
I had to get him especially out of my life so that I could start the
-- the sooner the better -- and this meant
The excitement of a #NewMove and #NewLife thrilled me so I needed the #Solitude to rethink some things as I continued to move forward. I did not want to wake up breathing the same air as him or live in the same climate as him, so I moved at least 2 days ride by car from him.
My Second #CurveBall - #BrokenFrontTooth
was the loss of my beautiful smile at age 62. It's been my goal for months to stop writing
all my presentations on facebook.com, instagram.com, youtube.com, vimeo.com and other video platforms.
s a business owner, you have to stay in front of your #TargetAudience or
#TargetMarket, who is women ages 30-60. I do this by writing regular
As I was finishing up my
"One Year Gardening Journey,"
in Austin, TX, I did stop
writing for a spell and had set up my background in my office for filming videos -- preparing to do nothing but film videos.
This is because most folks are
"visual". They want to see what you look like and what you sound like so if you are teaching a certain group of individuals today, especially African Americans, you will only be able to reach them through
s I prepared to
and get away from
, but teach my audience instead with #Videos, I was on my way to the gym and I bit down on a nut bar and out of the blue, my teeth broke off.
This was at the same time that I was
out of the door of my relationship.
Now this was the teeth next to my two front
teeth so you can imagine why that did to my
I was devastated! Not only had this
to leave Texas, but it altered my plan to
my videos in my business, and most of all -- it altered how I looked -- period.
Many people (especially Seniors) can and do
when something like this happens to them, especially if they don't have a
around them and especially if they are already dealing with
Some even see a loss of a
, especially since it alters your entire look. And for those who are not
to fix the tooth, they can
fall into depression.
Before I received the partial plate, one of my daughters suggested that I go ahead and just film myself from the other side...kind of like what TV does with Don Lemon on CNN, who has a scar on one side of his face. So they always film him from the other angle.
I knew how to do this, but it just seemed like it would be too much work so I
filming my videos and continued to stay in front of my audience by continuing to write
enewsletters, articles and work on books.
(Boycott Blueprint, #27 coming soon).
That was on a Friday evening when my teeth broke so I had to spend two days trying to figure out my next move. All the dentist's offices were closed until Monday so I had to practice speaking with my mouth closed.
I was able to go to a dentist on Monday and right away we tried to come up with an
for my teeth. The dentist stated because of where the teeth were located, a bridge from another teeth was out of the question.
He said the
I had was to get an
in my mouth. They said their offices don't do implants, so they referred me to another dentist. So as soon as I got an appointment with the other dentist office, I took the earliest appointment.
Once the dentist did an examination of my entire mouth, he came back with an
#ActionPlan for me to get a
"dental implant." He said before he could even get the implant for my mouth, I needed
oral surgery, where they would finish removing the broken teeth; implant
into my jawline; and fit me for a partial plate.
Replacement teeth supported by dental implants function so well supposedly and last so long because, like natural teeth, they are securely anchored in the jawbone for maximum support.
In order to benefit from this remarkable technology, however, you need to have enough tooth-supporting bone in your jaw to hold a dental implant in place.
Unfortunately, after tooth loss, the surrounding bone almost always deteriorates - decreasing in width, height and density - and this process starts immediately.
The longer a tooth has been missing, the more the bone that used to surround it resorbs (melts away). The bone used in a bone graft can come from your body or a donor, or it can be entirely synthetic. It can provide a framework where new, living bone can grow if it's accepted by the body.
I was hesitant about this procedure and wish
could have came from my body -- instead of a
. However, this was the
I had to get back my beautiful smile.
e said I would have to wait 5 months for the
to heal before they can put in the #Implant.
The dentist also said before he could put in the implant, I needed work completed on two other teeth, which his office did not do so he referred me back to the other dentist.
My thoughts were that these dentists probably
each other to make money.
So right away I knew it would be a long-drawn
out process to get my beautiful smile back again. But I was ready to
#TakeAction and put in the work to get back on track with my teeth, my business and basically my life.
Before I went to the dentist's office, I went out and paid $100 for
dental insurance at
But the dentist office said that if I going to work with them, I needed to cancel my dental insurance because they go through a credit company called
which many people also use to take care of animals.
They then referred me to their in-house financial office and man for once in my life, I was glad I had
#GoodCredit. Four-thousand dollars ($4,000) later, I am still waiting to get the
#DentalImplant and is wearing a partial plant made by the dental office.
I told them when they made the partial plate,
make it small since it was only for
ut when I went in to get fitted, it went all over my entire mouth, which means even now, it's hard to #Breathe sometimes with the partial plate in my mouth.
And it's also hard to #Speak with the partial plate in my mouth, and especially to #Eat with it in my mouth. And some days I just forget and walk out of the house without it.
This is all by design. They make the
partial plates for your mouth and charge you the most money for all these procedures. They make these partial plates
so that you continue to get expensive procedures (if you can afford it) recommended by dentists.
Now since I am in a new city, I need to find another dental office that deal with
"Care Credit" and who does implants and other dental procedures -
To this day I am not even sure that
"dental implants" are healthy for your mouth or is this going to be a
"foreign object" in my body.
However, if these are the #OnlyDentalProcedures they can do, then I guess I have no other option.
It's either that or have all my teeth pulled and get false teeth or dentures, but overall, I don't want to do that because at age 62, I still feel like I have a "healthy mouth."
I do have several dental amalgam (heavy metal fillings from when I was in the military) and this is why I have issues with #HeavyMetalPoisoning leaking into my system (my body) so therefore, I need to continuously eat foods that rid my body of #HeavyMetals or engage in regular detoxification (detox for short) programs.
Dental amalgam is a liquid mercury and metal alloy mixture used in dentistry to fill cavities caused by tooth decay. Supposedly, they use different material for dental fillings today.
Many seniors lose their teeth and become
because of their embarrassment. I understand the feeling totally by my own experience with my #CurveBall.
So make sure you take care of your teeth as you age. Don't use your teeth to open packages and don't eat foods that can damage your teeth.
I think God that my recent
weren't that bad, and all I had to do was
and continue to move forward. Again, don't allow
to stop you in your track.
Have enough info in your
surrounding yourself with
urn your home into a #LearningCenter by r
eading books, watching online seminars, workshops, webinars and conduct research on Google.com and YouTube.com -- so that you can
and get on with the process of living your best life ever. Good luck!
Cathy Harris is an Empowerment and Motivational Speaker, Advice Columnist at
, Non-GMO Health and Wellness Expert, Business Coach and Self-Publishing Expert and the author of 26 non-fiction books at
. Her books covers topics such as family and community empowerment, health, youth and adult entrepreneurship, writing/publishing, workplace discrimination, whistleblowing, government, law enforcement, domestic and international traveling, politics, media, beauty, car buying and selling for women, aging/retirement - just to name a few. She offers seminars, workshops and consultations at