I'm wondering.....What comes to mind when you think about being kind to yourself?  Bubble
baths, green smoothies, massages, yoga classes?  If so, I do agree that those are wonderful ways to nurture yourself and what I would like to talk about here is establishing a foundation of kindness within your own consciousness.  To have you feel like you are moving through your days with peace and grace, in order to allow yourself to build a solid foundation that becomes your new normal.  And on the days when nothing seems to be going right, rather than to blame yourself or others you'll relax, breathe, and let it be what it is.  Does that sound good?

Loving yourself unconditionally for who and what you are right now, is an essential component to living a life of radical kindness.  Self-love can be a super, scary topic for many of us and one that can feel vast and overwhelming.  I can hear some of you saying, "How can I love myself?"  "Where do I start?  I can't even stick to an exercise program or keep up with the laundry!!"
Self-love starts with self-acceptance. Like so many of us, as we grew up, we learned to constantly focus on problems, on what was wrong.

Curious?  Did you feel ashamed if you got a test question wrong in school? When you look at your reflection in the mirror, do you focus on that one pimple or those few wrinkles? Overall the meal you cooked tasted great, except that the pasta was a little overcooked. You do well at your job, and what sticks in your head is the one report your boss criticized. And truly, our whole society is set up this way. Just listen to the evening news for five minutes. Hmmmmm.....On second thought, don't.

As we search for the "problems", who is the person we criticize most?  Ourselves!  There in the privacy of our own mind, we berate ourselves endlessly for perceived flaws and/or mistakes.  We feel bad about the few things we didn't accomplish in a day, rather than being satisfied with the gazillion things we actually did.

Self-criticism can become a habit. And..... The good news is that habits can be changed.
Rather than leaping right into the deep end of unconditional self-love, what if you were to try sticking your toe into the inviting waters of self-acceptance?  Cultivating the habit of self-acceptance is a matter of practice.  Honestly, you can learn to be kind to yourself  (if you choose to). Below I have shared  a few simple actions to take each day to start a  kindness practice.
  • Get mindful.  First, tune in and take notice of what your inner monologue sounds like.  Ask yourself, "What if someone else was treating me this way?"  I must admit, when I first started working with self-acceptance, I was a bit shocked when I posed that question to myself.  Honestly, if someone had spoken to me the way I was speaking to myself, we would have had a serious conversation!
  • Watch out for the double-negative.  When you notice that you are being unkind inside your own mind, you may feel guilty or upset.   Scolding yourself for your self-criticism perpetuates the cycle.  Instead, try taking a few deep breaths and resolve to do better.  Knowing is half the battle.  Stop the snowball effect as soon as you can.
  • Compliment yourself on purpose.  Sure, it may feel really silly at first and when self-
    criticism arises, intentionally replace it with a few kind words.  For example; If you can't believe you let the kitchen get so messy, recall the delicious meal you made last night and how much your family enjoyed it.  Compliment yourself for the little things and the big things.  You're changing your inner mindset!
  • Notice your weak spots.  It's true, we all have areas where we are especially sensitive.  You may be an inspired artist and loving parent, yet you wish you were thinner, or taller, or prettier. You might love your physical body and your caring generosity, and hate that you never finished college.  What if you were to hold yourself gently in those areas you consider your biggest flaws and took the time to discover hidden treasures there;  your strong muscles and dimpled smile, or the way you think outside the box?
  • Take yourself less seriously.  If you take everything you say to yourself as gospel, it will truly drive you crazy!  A sense of humor is a really big help.  Sometimes I find myself in the midst of an inner rant where my whole day is ruined because I didn't do this-or-that, and I just start to laugh.  Our inner critics can be so very melodramatic!  Try laughing and letting it go!
Be patient with your new practice of self-acceptance.  You might feel like you're traveling in circles, and changing an ingrained habit does take some time. 

Continually practicing radical self-acceptance will change the way you inhabit the world.  Your energy system will shift as you learn to treat yourself more kindly. You'll be more centered and less frantic. Your deep inner change will ripple outward into the world.  Others will notice this change and they might ask you what's different.  Without intending to, you will become a role model for others who wish to be more kind to themselves.

Your radical self-acceptance will gradually become unconditional self-love , and from that space of deep inner grounding, you will be ready to spread radical kindness throughout the world.

Sending you much radical Love & Blessings!  Joanie
How we feel matters--yes, literally emotions become matter. Candice Pert, in her book, " Molecules of Emotions" tells us that every single thought we have stimulates our body to produce a variety of protein called peptides. Peptides are among the body's key "information substances" and when they flood the body with message specific cells our bodies produce a physical reaction that can  "affect our mind, our emotions, our immune system, our digestion and other bodily functions simultaneously."

Next time something disappointing happens in your life and you feel yourself sliding down
the slippery sad slope reach for your favorite essential oil and breathe in deeply. The aromatic chemistry of essential oils have the amazing ability to get into the body through the nasal passages directly to the limbic system--the emotional area of the brain, bypassing the thinking/analytical brain, also known as "monkey mind".  

When I find myself in that place I often choose  the uplifting qualities of Bergamot essential oil. Daniel Mc Donald, author of "Emotional Healing and Essential Oils",  calls Bergamot the Oil of Self-Acceptance.  
"Bergamot relieves feels of despair, self-judgement, and low self-esteem. It supports individuals in need of self-acceptance and self-love. it invites individuals to see life with more optimism."
If you would like a sample of Bergamot or would like to try one of doTERRA's essential oils, just contact me @ coachjoanie@joanieyanusas.com . I can send you a free sample or arrange to meet.

* One of the most vital things you must know about essential oils is not all essential oils are created equally. In fact, most of them are worthless to your health and often synthetic. When buying essential oils make s
ure they are certified pure therapeutic grade. If you want to order the brand I trust and personally use  feel free to email me @ coachjoanie@joanieyanusas.com

Customized Retreat

Make the time in your personal and work life to slow down, listen to your inner voice and reclaim your dreams.  Coach Joanie  will work with you to design a customized retreat to meet your needs.

A customized retreat can be a one hour brown bag lunch retreat with your co-workers or a day retreat for your staff to rejuvenate and relax. You can use a retreat to make girls' night out or a girls' weekend getaway a more authentic sharing experience. Create a retreat with Joanie to mark a milestone birthday for yourself or a friend. Organize one for mothers and daughters. Hold a family reunion around a customized retreat. Use it as time set aside to mark an anniversary with thoughtful reflection. It can be just for you or for a group of co-workers, friends or family. It can last for an hour or a weekend. You get to choose and work with Joanie to design a customized retreat to allow you to slow down and listen to your inner wisdom.

Your customized retreat can be held at any location you desire (B&B, conference center, your home or office, on a hike, at a beach - use your imagination!).
Questions or to schedule your customized retreat please, contact Joanie here
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