It’s Behind Me, Isn’t It?

No, the real Halloween monster lies within!

 10 tips to see if you are living in the shadows of possibility 

Greetings!

You know, it’s so spooky what we do to ourselves.

I’m not talking Scream masks and black lipstick get-ups for the season. For we are in a constant good vs bad battle with our inner Goth; fighting it out on the dark side against the hero’s journey of trying to lighten up. 

“What if I fail/am not good enough/people won’t like me/the worst happens?” is the inner script that even Stephen King would bin because it’s too bleak. Yet we run it on a constant doom loop often unaware of its insidious consequences.

It’s Behind Me Isn’t It?

Everyone has heard of the new term of “ghosting” – ending communication without explanation when a relationship or friendship isn’t of use any more. In other words, just being bad mannered with a side order of cowardice. Or just simply rude.

Then we have the other horror of gaslighting for which a quick Google search revealed “to manipulate (someone) by psychological means into doubting their own sanity”. 



Shudder! Sounds like there are some real dastardly dastards out there looking to control and wreck the lives of those who cross their path. Let’s leave those cosplayers to lose their own game. 

The Call Came From Your Own House (excuse my horror movie references 😱)

But what if you are the perp? The hooded stalker menacing your every step, the cobwebby creep who crushes your dreams and keeps you small?

What if the Grim Reaper of hope you are nourishing a co-dependent relationship with is none other than (spoiler alert) – YOU?!

Gaslighting and ghosting – leaving yourself mad, bad and in the dark

If you tick more than a few of these 10 points you need to either turn yourself into the local authorities, douse the house in garlic or get a coach.

Check out these energy vampires and dream stealers.  Recognise your own demons here?

• Post-Mortem-ing– dragging up mistakes you’ve made in the past as evidence that you are not good enough now or ever. Ruminating, shredding yourself apart and groaning over things you wish you’d handled better.
• Annihilating– ignoring the fact that you have done countless amazing, brave and wonderful things but in your mind they just “don’t count”. Refusing to acknowledge the good in yourself.
• Impending Doom – always feeling as though something bad will happen, failure will be fatal and that you will never be able to get what you want in life. 
• Victim – poor boundaries with others and putting other people’s lives and needs before your own. A feeling of being of less worth than anyone else. Life hurts you.
• Terrorising – choosing to listen to the corrosive thoughts on a perma-loop in your head which churns up so much negativity and self- recrimination it blots out the sun.
• Doubting – not trusting your thoughts, your choices, your heart, your dreams, yourself.
• Cruelty – trying to motivate yourself by saying unkind or horrible things to yourself
• Judgement - your attachment to perfectionism means you and life never feel quite good enough. Using perfectionism as false protection from painful emotions.
• Fear – investing in your doubts instead of your dreams. 
• Crushing – playing small to fit in, to not shine your light to please others

Anxiety is a rubbish clairvoyant. It’s time to write your own Disney ending.

 More treats, no tricks.  Book a discovery a call with me today for free.