My mom is a lively 91 years old, living in her own apartment with daily visits from one of the five siblings within driving distance. I'm 90 minutes without traffic away, or three podcasts each way. We call her Nana.
My normal visiting day each week is Wednesday or Friday. I stop by and do a couple of simple things on a list she sometimes makes for me. Occasionally, I do the dishes, organize the refrigerator, and take out the trash. I was in the restaurant business for several decades, so not only are old habits hard to break, I happen to very good at most of my old habits. Two of my sisters perform much more important and frequent functions.
As part of my weekly visits, I provide a detailed update on, well, what I’m up to: where I’ve been, how I’ve been, and with whom I’ve been. (Does anyone know if it is 'who' or 'whom'? I think it's whom, so I'm going with it. I generally read this Wednesday Weblog to Nana before I leave since she no longer uses email.
One week after a particularly robust report on my volunteer service to organizations old and new, some medical experiences, live music event or three, and a little bit of travel, she looked me right in the eye and said “You lead a really interesting life. And it’s your own fault.” And it gave me pause.
I guess I do lead an interesting life, now that you mention it. You could make a case that you wouldn’t be reading this unless I lead, or led, an interesting life.
Driving back from my mom’s apartment, I thought about the fact that I’ve always led an interesting life. I mean always.
I’ve had years where I went to more than 120 live music shows, and others where I went to 70 major league baseball games, and years where I traveled on private jets, (the reason I don’t like roller coasters). I've run half-marathons, been in dozens and dozens of football, basketball and hockey stadiums. I've met governors, ambassadors, and senators, not to mention Shania Twain, Kenny Chesney, and Peter Frampton. I even shared a pizza with Wayne Huizenga in Miami (see below), and went drinking with Al Copeland in San Francisco (see below).
And of course being married to the same wonderful woman, currently my proofreader, for more than 46 years has been very interesting as well.
So, I’ve led an interesting life. Buy why? Accidental or planned? I started thinking about whose job it is to make our lives interesting. Who did we assign that responsibility to? When did we assign it?
The reality is my mom is right: if your life is interesting, or if it is not, it is your fault. No one cares about your life being interesting as much as you do. No one has more at stake than you do.
If you look at the work side of things, the question could be posed ‘whose job is it to make your job interesting?’ If you totally rely on your company or supervisor to make your job interesting you probably have a boring job.
When you think of the most interesting parts of your job or your personal life, my guess is that you had something to do with it by customizing the role or creating that twist or that enhancement to something basic you really find interesting
It’s not too late to make your life interesting. Here's a simple example:
I worked in California with a guy from New Hampshire, and we would commiserate that we were too far from Fenway or the Garden or Foxboro to attend games, and in those days, for example, one year the Celtics won the world championship and the games were not even on TV in Los Angeles. Not. On. TV. It was hard to get a sports fix out there.
One night while sipping cheap chardonnay on Stearns Wharf in Santa Barbara harbor, (the best place in the world to drink) we came up with the idea to make our lives as New England sports fans more interesting. Within two years we had seen the Patriots play in Anaheim and Seattle. We saw the Red Sox play in San Diego, Anaheim, Oakland and Seattle, plus the Celtics and Bruins play in Los Angeles. I can assure you, our lives were more interesting as a result.
I use this example to illustrate the fact that many people don’t lead interesting lives because they give away the capacity to do so. Living an interesting life isn't their goal.
Many people settle for boring.
- Why wasn't last week an interesting week for you? Who did you assign the task of making your week interesting?
- What do you think could make your life interesting this week, if your goal was to make your life interesting? (While keeping it legal, social distanced and doing it with clean hands).
- As you go through the week ask yourself questions about 'interesting.' For example, are you watching TV because you’re bored? Or are you bored because you are watching TV?
The world doesn’t owe you ‘interesting’, you owe you interesting. Whether you have an interesting life or not, it’s clearly your own fault.
It's your own fault.
