e-directions newsletter | November 2014

One topic no one ever seems to want to discuss is how to plan for an aging loved one who may not be able to live as independently going forward.  


That is the expertise of JFCS L'Chaim Senior Services. We are the source to turn to as you ready yourself for "that talk" with your aging parent or loved one.  


Recently, I had the privilege to introduce our Family Consultation Services to clients who worried their aging father would no longer be able to drive, shop, cook or otherwise care for himself as he once did. They needed help having this difficult discussion with him. 


JFCS' professional, caring staff continuously demonstrate the skills and sensitivity necessary to ensure these hard conversations occur with dignity and respect, keeping emotions manageable and giving family members comfort with future planning.  


Aging well and continuing to live in place without isolation is what everyone wants. At JFCS, we make it possible for people to live independently by providing the small touches and essential services that make a positive difference in the quality of life.


From our family to yours, wishing you a joyous Thanksgiving.  


Judy Halper
Chief Executive Officer
Table of Contents
26th Annual Benefit
What would you GIVE
Family Life Education Programs
Volunteer Drivers Needed
Dreidel Dash
Life Lessons
Pathways Renewing Life Series
Take Stock
Community Partners Award
On the job success
Darchei Noam
AskBarbara - Relationships
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Are you free Saturday night? 
It's the JFCS 26th Annual Benefit
We can still get you in!
8 p.m. Saturday, Nov. 22, Hilton Minneapolis, 1001 Marquette Ave S 
Join us for the biggest night of our year! Laugh at funnyman Jake Johannsen. Enjoy a cocktail hour and the Cindi and Harold Goldfine Dessert Reception, a "40 and Under" Pre-Party, exciting raffle and $100 Pull, and much more beginning at 8 p.m.

For more information call the Annual Benefit Hotline at 952-542-4878 or buy tickets at the door!
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What would you GIVE if you could change a life? 
What would you give if you could help one woman leave the fear and brutality of a violent relationship?

Recently a woman in her early 30s came to JFCS with a black eye. She also suffered from depression and had post-traumatic stress. Through the Jewish Domestic Abuse Collaborative (JDAC) she was connected to JFCS Emergency Financial Assistance, which provided funds so she could stay in a motel until space in a women's shelter opened. The woman also saw a JFCS counselor to work on issues surrounding her safety and breaking the cycle of abuse so she can begin to heal and put the pieces of her life back together.

JDAC is just one of
40 programs at JFCS providing essential services to 16,000 people of all backgrounds and at all stages of life.  

Give2014 Your contribution to this year's campaign, Give2014, helps fund these crucial programs that strengthen our community one person at a time. On behalf of those who benefit from your generosity, we thank you!

Give Help.     Give Hope.     Give2014

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Family Life Education Programs
Programs for Interfaith Families
6:30-8:30 p.m. Monday, Dec. 1
At JFCS, 13100 Wayzata Blvd, Minnetonka

Whether you light Chanukah candles or Christmas tree lights, holidays can stir up feelings about family, celebrations and identity.
Join us for a free workshop addressing how to deal with these sensitive and important topics. 

Grief and Loss Series
6:30-8 p.m. Thursday, Dec. 4 (note different night) 
At JFCS, 13100 Wayzata Blvd, Minnetonka

The Grieving Family: When a family loses a loved one, they grieve together and individually. This is because the relationship to the person is different and because men, women and children do not grieve in the same way. This class will help families understand each other better by looking at the unique ways each person experiences loss and the grieving process.

To RSVP, please contact Barbara Rudnick
at brudnick@jfcsmpls.org.
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NextGen volunteers needed
4-5:30 p.m. Sunday, Dec. 14  

Help run this year's JFCS Annual Sid Hartman Jewish Big Brother/Big Sister Chanukah Festival.

The kids will have lots of fun stations like cookie decorating, games and contests.

Help is needed with:
* Set-up and/or Clean-up
* Leading activities
* Serving as a substitute for a Little without a Big

If you can help, email Todd at tsandler@jfcsmpls.org.

Click here to learn more about the JFCS Jewish Big Brother/Big Sister Program.

 Like us on Facebook NextGen's Lead Sponsor | Deborah and Gary Kohler

  Sponsor | Cindy and Perry Witkin

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Drivers needed for Mental Health Support Services (MHSS) Chanukah Bowling & Bingo Party 
2-4 p.m. Sunday, Dec. 7
Park Tavern, 3401 Louisiana Ave S, St. Louis Park
Pick up a client, bowl a few frames, play some bingo and nosh. If that sounds like the perfect Sunday afternoon, then join us at the third annual MHSS Chanukah Bowling & Bingo party.
To volunteer to drive a participant to and from the party, contact Stacey Spencer, Client and Volunteer Event Coordinator, at Stacey.spencer@jfcsmpls.org or at 952-542-4845. 
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7th Annual Dreidel Dash and Post Dash Bash
Sunday, Dec. 14
10k run: 12:30 p.m. at the St. Paul JCC, 1375 St. Paul Ave
5k run/walk: 1:15 p.m. at Temple of Aaron, 616 Mississippi River Blvd
Maccabee Mini Mile (ages 10 and under): 2:15 p.m. at the St. Paul JCC
Post Dash Bash: 2-4 p.m. at the St. Paul JCC

Participate! Join more than 500 runners and walkers dashing along the scenic Mississippi. Participants receive official Dreidel Dash hats! To register, click here.    


Volunteer! Direct traffic outside during the race. Email Stacy Dockman at sdockman@stpauljcc.org.


After the races, warm up and celebrate at the metro's largest Chanukah party, featuring great post-race goodies, activities and entertainment. 

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Life Lessons: The lethality of loneliness 
a post by Emma Nadler, MA, LPCC
The lethality of loneliness: John Cacioppo at TEDxDesMoines
A TED talk by John Cacioppo

Wouldn't it be amazing if we didn't add stigma or shame to our emotional states? Imagine a world where we allowed ourselves to experience a range of feelings, without adding self-criticism to the mix.

Take loneliness, for example. We are social animals, pack animals, who need to connect with others for survival. As Neuroscientist  John Cacioppo deftly explains, when we feel loneliness, it is like feeling hunger or thirst: it signals us to act in the way of our best interests.

When we are hungry, we generally recognize this as a healthy reminder to eat. The same is true for the thirst cue, it is a sign to drink. We don't judge ourselves for it. And when we feel lonely, it is a call to action that apprises us of the need to reach out to others. The cue reminds us we need to be a part of something, to find comfort through connection.

To read more about tangible ways to stay connected, click here.
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Pathways Renewing Life™ Support Group

Beginning mid-January, JFCS - in partnership with Pathways, Health Crisis Resource Center - will offer an educational/emotional support group through an intensive nine-week series, that meets for two-and-a-half hours each week.

The proven curriculum empowers participants to live authentically, view challenging life events as an opportunity for growth, and create plans for renewed living.

Participants who may benefit the most are those with:
 - chronic or life threatening illness
 - life transition (e.g. divorce, job loss, retirement, bereavement)
 - mild depression, sense of feeling stuck
 - addiction recovery
 - someone serving as a support person or caregiver


Thanks to a generous donor the group will be offered at no cost.  


If you're interested in participating, contact Judy Marcus at jmarcus@jfcsmpls.org or 952-542-2113.

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Take Stock - Don't miss out on year-end giving opportunities

Donating stock, instead of cash, can be advantageous in a number of ways.   


If you own stock and the value has increased since you purchased it, you can avoid paying the capital gains tax by donating the security to another party, like JFCS.  


When the security is donated to a charitable organization, the total amount will still be eligible for a tax deduction. Since taxation is avoided on the stock donation, the giver will be able to make a larger donation.


If you're interested in learning more about donating stock, including Medtronic stock, click here to read about donation options.  

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Key Community Partners Award

JFCS proudly received a Key Community Partners Award from Senior Community Services (SCS).  


SCS and JFCS have a collaborative partnership that works to serve clients of both agencies. 


JFCS clients can get subsidized CHORE services, which assist older adults, helping them maintain a clean, sanitary and safe environment. These heavy household chores include sweeping and washing floors, cleaning windows, shoveling snow and more.  


SCS clients can access the JFCS Deikel Transportation Program, which offers curb-to-curb service, helping adults get to medical appointments, friends' homes, the grocery store and more.  


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On the job success 
This is Pamela. Pamela suffers from memory issues, making work a challenge. For almost 15 years Pamela has worked at the non-profit MN FAIR Plan, a position she landed through JFCS Vocational Rehabilitation Services.


JFCS provides personalized services to individuals with disabilities who seek employment or want to improve their work lives.

Pamela finds the routine of working in
 a mailroom helpful. She meets regularly with her JFCS employment counselor to discuss her goals for job attendance and communicating with her supervisor.


"JFCS has helped me in many ways over the years," Pamela said. "If I didn't have these services, I probably wouldn't have a job."  


(Thanks to Pamela for allowing us to share her story and to MN FAIR Plan for being a great employer partner.) 


To learn more, visit the JFCS Career Page on our website. 

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Darchei Noam 
Made in Heaven
9-10:30 a.m. Sunday, Nov. 23 
2950 Joppa Ave S, St. Louis Park

Want to learn more about dating and mating in Judaism through the lens of two classic Biblical narratives - Adam and Eve, and Isaac and Rebecca? Rabbi Joseph Ozarowski will offer some commentary on current dating patterns in the Orthodox community during his lecture Shiddukhim and a look at couples through the eyes of classic texts in Bereshit.
The program is free and open to the public. 
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By Danielle Livon-Bemel,
JFCS Community Youth Specialist

Danielle, the JFCS Community Youth Specialist, provides a safe, confidential forum for kids and their parents to ask questions about the challenges in their lives. You can email Danielle privately at DLivonBemel@jfcsmpls.org or visit the Healthy Youth-Healthy Communities Facebook page.  

Stress Check

Grab a pen and paper and tally a point for each true statement: 


I play sports
I have brothers or sisters
I've gone to overnight camp
I speak more than one language
I have an allergy
I participate in an after-school activity
I've traveled to another country
I've been hurt by a best friend
I've felt I wouldn't get through a difficult time
I've broken up with someone
I've had a rumor or gossip spread about me
I'm on the A or B honor roll
I've had a headache in the past week
I've argued with a family member recently
My team's lost in a sporting event


Did you mark "true" to one or more of these statements? Then it's safe to say you have been stressed or anxious and that means you are ... human.


To read more about the stress teenagers face, click here.


HY-HC's Lead Sponsor | The Toodle and Frank Trestman Special Needs and Collaborative Education Endowment Fund

If you need a free, quick, confidential answer or insight into parenting or family relationships, just AskBarbara! Her expertise includes parenting, interfaith programs, workplace issues, grief, loss and the challenges of caregiving. To have your question privately answered, email askbarbara@jfcsmpls.org.    

To read
past AskBarbara columns, click here.     


Jewish Family and Children's Service of Minneapolis
13100 Wayzata Blvd. Suite 400
Minnetonka, MN 55305

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www.jfcsmpls.org | 952-546-0616

Mission Statement
Inspired by the wisdom and values of our tradition,
Jewish Family and Children's Service of Minneapolis
supports people of all backgrounds to reach their full potential.