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The Importance of Timing
January, 2020
Quote of the month


"Timing is 

the essence 

of life and definitely of comedy."


b y Bob Hope, American   

stand-up comedian, actor and singer.

My Services
Pre-Marital Counseling
Certified Prepare/Enrich Program Facilitator
Marital Counseling
Infidelity Issues
Self-Esteem Support
Problem-Solving Support
Renew Marital Excitement
Family counseling

Divorce Support
Redefining Life Purpose
Grief/Loss Support


I welcome the opportunity to help you work through current issues and to look at your future with a sense of hope and purpose.


Masters Degree - Applied Psychology from Seton Hall University


Post-Masters Degree-Marriage and Family Therapy from Seton Hall University


Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist


Private Practice 

since 2008


Married over 30 years


Mother of 2 

young-adult daughters 


Lived in Indiana, 

New Jersey and Texas


Passionate about 

what I do


Some of you may ask why my newsletter is late this month. I usually send it out either a few days before or a few days after the first of the month. My reasoning is that the timing works. My January newsletter is usually a little later in the month due to timing. At the beginning of January, my readers are still getting packed up from the holiday season and slowly getting back into a routine. If I sent that newsletter on January 3rd or 4th, I would bet that very few would read it. Now that we have settled back into our routines, you might be more likely to absorb the information in the newsletter. With that being said, read below about some situations that you may encounter and how the timing can be the difference between success or no success in a situation.

Maryellen Dabal, MA, LMFT
305 Miron Drive
Southlake, TX 76092
Missed previous newsletters??
Go to www.dabalmft.com.  Click on the newsletters link at the bottom of the home page. Enjoy.....
From The Positive Perspective.......
Attempting to have a difficult conversation with someone.
Have you ever tried to talk to someone and they were not paying attention or were yawning while you were talking? If we have something important to say, why not set the stage to be as effective as it can be. First of all, check with the other person you want to talk to and make sure it is a good time for them. If they are getting ready to leave for the day or just finished a tough day at work or school, they might not be in the right frame of mind to listen to what you have to say.

So we have set a good day and time for both of you. Now what? Next, let the other person know what kind of conversation you want to have. Is this going to be a venting session or a situation where you need input and opinions. That makes a difference in how the other person approaches the conversation. If they just have to listen, then they don't necessarily have to pay attention to all the details. If you need advice or an opinion, then the listener will approach the conversation by paying more attention and even taking some notes. Because you have set things up to be successful by being concerned with the timing, you have a better chance of success.

Going to the grocery store or doing errands.
When you have errands to run do you just write a list of where you have to go or what you need and just go? How about planning those errands so that your time is used very efficiently? When my kids were younger and in school, I used to plan my after-work schedule. I would plan a "stay-at-home" afternoon where I would do all the things at home that needed to be done and take another day to not go home after work and efficiently get all my errands done. I even tried to plan, depending on what time I got off from work, when would be the most convenient and least crowded times or days to go to the grocery store. Changing your timing could save you time in the long run.

Planning a get together at your home.
You have decided to have friends over. How do you make it successful? Timing can make a difference. If you know it's a holiday weekend or when most people are away, your positive RSVP's may be pretty slim. If you know you want certain people to attend, check with them first to be sure they will be around when you are planning to have the event. You may have to change the date to accommodate. Do you like weekend events? Do you tend to be better at daytime events or evening events? Knowing how you like to entertain and the time of day you prefer can help to make the event a success. You may also want to put an end time to the event if you know you need to go to sleep by midnight.

Making a new commitment.
I recently was asked to join an organization that had their meetings on a weeknight at 7pm. That meeting was being held about 25 miles away and involved rush hour traffic on the way to the meeting. Knowing myself, due to the timing of the meeting, the distance and time of day, I knew I would not be able to give 100% and be able to attend any spontaneous events or meetings. Knowing what timing I am able to commit to can help with being able to know when to say yes. If the meeting had been during the day or mid-morning and not involving as much traffic, I may have said yes. I do not believe in making a commitment if I am not able to give 100%. Asking questions about the time and length of the commitment and knowing what you will and will not do, can help with your decision.

This is just a taste of situations where timing can make a difference. I would enjoy hearing from my readers on how they have used timing to be successful. I wish you well in rearranging some things so that timing is not an issue.

Try to look at the situations in life
From the Positive Perspective
and we can work through anything!
I welcome feedback regarding the newsletter or questions about my practice.  I can be reached at maryellen@dabalmft.com .  I cannot, however, give advice through email. For more information on my practice please visit my website: www.dabalmft.com

I wish you well...

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