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 January, 2012

Quote of the month


"Friendship with oneself is all important 


without it one cannot be friends with anybody else 

in the world."


by Eleanor Roosevelt quotes (American United Nations Diplomat, Humanitarian and First Lady (1933-45), wife of Franklin D. Roosevelt, 32nd US president. 1884-1962)

My Services
Pre-Marital Counseling
Certified Prepare/Enrich Program Facilitator
Marital Counseling
Infidelity Issues
Self-Esteem Support
Problem-Solving Support
Renew Marital Excitement
Family counseling

Divorce Support
Collaborative Law Communications Facilitator
Redefining Life Purpose
Grief/Loss Support


Providing assistance through the entire Marriage Life Cycle.


I welcome the opportunity to help you work through current issues and to look at your future with a sense of hope and purpose.


Masters Degree - Applied Psychology from Seton Hall University


Post-Masters Degree-Marriage and Family Therapy from Seton Hall University


Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Associate


Private Practice 

since 2008


NJ work experience totaling 5 years


Married 23 years


Mother of 2 teenage daughters 


Lived in Indiana, 

New Jersey and Texas


Passionate about 

what I do




Welcome to another year of information that I hope will inspire you in some way. If you are new to my newsletter, thank you for showing interest in what I have to offer.  I strive to explore a variety of areas of life and assist my readers in possibly thinking about issues in a different way.  Thank you for your continued support of these newsletters if you are a faithful follower.  Your feedback is most appreciated. Enjoy!!


Have a wonderful month of January and of course, call for an appointment if you wish to discuss this or any other topic that may be of concern to you at the moment.


Please forward this newsletter on to someone you feel may benefit from it's content.



 Maryellen Dabal, MA, LMFTA

Southlake Counseling & Neurofeedback Center

420 North Carroll Ave Suite 140

Southlake, TX 76092



Missed previous newsletters??

Go to  Click on the newsletters link at the bottom of the home page. Enjoy.....


From The Positive Perspective.......


What purpose do friends serve in your life?  Do you have to see them every day to consider them a close friend or can they still be your best friend, even if they live 3,000 miles away, you talk to them only once in a blue moon, but when you do see them, it's like time has not even passed? Think about your definition of a friend and do you surround yourself with those who fit that category?


You can't have too many friends.  You don't have to give up the friends you currently have to make room for more.  There should be plenty of room for everyone.  


Keep in mind that you can have many levels of friends such as those you go to in time of crisis or extreme excitement; those that you play a sport with or do a certain activity with; those who are always there for some fun and encouragement; those who you share a bond with such as a cause or charity; and of course there are those that we are friends with 'just because'. Don't forget about being a good friend to yourself as well. 


To increase your rolodex of friends, find something that you are passionate about, like volunteering or gardening and join an organization where you can give of that passion.  You then have a better chance of meeting someone with that same passion and that interest can be shared.  I encourage college students to join clubs or get involved in activities that they already enjoy for the good chance of meeting other students who enjoy the same thing.  Then you decide from there where this friendship will go.  


All too often if we are in a new environment we tend to make friends with the first person we meet because we are afraid of not making any other friends.  No matter what that other person is like, we may stay friends with them "just in case".  Have patience with making friends and don't look to replace that 10 year friendship with someone you have just met.  Give the relationship time to grow and mature.  Be cautious about not being taken advantage of but share details of who you are at your discretion and at your speed.


What happens if you meet people and you find out you have nothing in common with them.  You determine at that point what type of relationship, if any, you want with that person.  Maybe it needs to be a more causal relationship or maybe it's a one-time meeting and that's it.  


Always keep boundaries in mind with friendships, especially if you are married or in a committed relationship.  Be sure both you and your significant other agree on friendship styles and keep no secrets.


What if you find yourself with a group that doesn't share some of the same values as you?  Maybe they smoke or drink and you don't.  Maybe they use curse words and that's not your style.  Maybe they are of a different religion.  But what if they are the only friends you have at the moment and you value other characteristics in them?  Remember that you have control of how these people influence your life and you decide if they stay a part of your life or not and to what degree. You have a choice of who enters your inner circle of friends.


No matter where you are, you are bound to find others who believe something of what you believe; you might just have to try more than one way to connect.  If you don't find them right away, don't give up.  Call that best friend who lives on another coast and talk with them for a while about your concerns.  Call a trusted family member who can listen and support you as well. Journal for a while if there are no friends you can contact right away.  Use your options.......use your resources.........remember who you are.


It helps to look at this situation From The Positive Perspective.......

I welcome feedback regarding the newsletter or questions about my practice.  I can be reached at  I cannot, however, give advice through email. For more information on my practice please visit my website:

I wish you well...