Dear Families and Friends,
Hope all is well with you and yours. Take a few minutes to review this newsletter with some info we thought might be helpful. Stay safe and healthy.
ASCF staff, Angela, Julie, Maria, Henry, Bebarce and Catherine
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Supporting parents’ mental health during the pandemic
Parenting during a pandemic is challenging, and when your child has a disability, the challenges can be even greater. Here are tips from Pacer Parent Center:
• Take care of your body. Getting enough sleep and exercise can impact your mood, as can developing healthy eating habits. “Grabbing a banana instead of a bag of potato chips makes a difference.”
• Connect with others. “Don’t let social distancing turn into social isolation. A phone or video chat can help with feelings of loneliness. If you are part of a faith community, stay in touch virtually to feel connected.”
• Take a break from watching or reading the news. “Take ten minutes to read something that has nothing to do with current events. A constant news diet can be overwhelming, especially when the news isn’t good.”
• Make time to relax and unwind. “Find activities and hobbies that you enjoy, whether it’s sewing, crafts, do-it-yourself home projects, journaling, or caring for plants.”
• Think positive. “Remember times you have overcome difficulty and realize that you can do that again. While no one would suggest that parents deny the stress they feel, positive thinking helps you manage your stress and can improve your physical and mental health.”
View PACER’s video on self-care during the pandemic at PACER.org/cmh/covid.asp
See complete article at https://www.pacer.org/newsletters/pacesetter/winter2021.pdf
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How to Grandparent a Child With Special Needs
by Susan Moeller, AARP, March 1, 2021
Educate yourself, provide support, know your limits and find the joy!
Advice for grandparents, from grandparents
If you are facing the challenge of grandparenting a child with special needs, be assured there are ways to get advice and support that will help you emotionally, physically and financially. Here is some advice from grandparents of children with disabilities and others:
● Learn about your grandchild's diagnosis. Time and information are “powerful tools,” says Harrington Meyer. Grandparents can be a huge resource by supporting parents and helping them to find programs and treatments. For example, many of the grandparents she spoke with for her book helped by driving a child to therapy sessions or accompanying parents on medical visits.
● Use education as a defense. Grandparents told Harrington Meyer that usually people were kind when they were out in public with a grandchild with disabilities, although things were sometimes awkward when someone in public reacted to a child's seemingly willful behavior. “Very rarely does somebody say anything negative, but when they did, the grandparents chose to educate rather than get mad,” she says. “And that seemed to give the grandparents a great deal of strength. They felt very proud of how good they'd gotten at that out in public.”
Fredette says his experiences with Tyler have made him more compassionate toward other children he sees out in public. “You hear people say when somebody's kids are screaming in the store, ‘He needs some discipline.’ …That's not our first reaction anymore,” he says.
● Know your grandchild's rights and advocate for them. Every state has a publicly supported information and training center for parents of children with special needs, such as the PACER Center, says Susan Einspar, a senior parent training and information advocate with PACER. The centers work with families to get the services and education to which their children are entitled under federal and state laws. For example, Oricchio says PACER helped him advocate for Sammy to have an aide in school. Some may have information or support groups for grandparents, as PACER does.
● Understand your own limits. “Just like we wanted the best for our own children, we certainly want the best for our grandchildren,” Einspar says. That means many grandparents are generous to a fault, whether it's with time or financial resources. Seek advice on how to help your children and grandchildren financially without too much risk to your own future, she says. And recognize your own physical limitations; this is a marathon, not a sprint. As you and your grandchild age, it may be harder to provide childcare, for example, and you'll need to adjust what you can do to help, grandparents say.
Tyler, now grown, no longer spends nights at his grandparents’ alone because, as he and they have aged, it's become more difficult for them to physically handle his seizures.
● Find support for yourself. Connect with other grandparents of children with disabilities who understand the medical and emotional issues. “Getting online, getting in a support group, getting attached to other grandparents who have the exact same diagnosis seems to be by far the best thing,” says Harrington Meyer.
● Discover the joy. Fredette can't wait for pandemic restrictions to be lifted. He wants to take Tyler for walks and out to eat and to spend the day with him again. “That's not going to change and hasn't since the day one with him,” he says. Einspar describes it as finding gifts among the challenges. “Perhaps you're not going to be able to go to their football game and see them as quarterback,” she says, “but you're going to have new dreams and aspirations for your grandchildren.”
Susan Moeller is a contributing writer who covers lifestyle, health, finance and human-interest topics. A former newspaper reporter and editor, she also writes features and essays for the Boston Globe magazine as well as her local NPR station, among other outlets.
For complete article go to https://www.aarp.org/home-family/friends-family/info-2021/special-needs-grandchildren.html
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This is the time for Developing an IEP?
Use the IEP Pop-Up Tool from Wrights Law
Present Levels, Goals & Services, Measuring Progress, Providing Accommodations
- Your child's IEP must include a plan to meet ALL your child’s unique needs that result from the disability.
- The IEP should tell you exactly what the school will do to address these needs.
- The IEP should include ways for you and your child's teachers to know if the child is making progress - if the IEP is working.
Check out this resource for pop up tool: https://www.wrightslaw.com/info/iep.develop.popup.htm
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Kids' Books Psychologists Recommend
Psychologists everywhere have noticed an uptick in children experiencing anxiety, stress, confusion, and other issues that have come as a result of 2020. We should note that these are completely normal things for children to experience, but what is the best way to work through these feelings? Many psychologists have turned to children's books to teach young readers how to deal with their emotions.
Here’s are 2 books that these psychologists are recommending to children.
I Am Brave by Daniela Owen. This is the second book of her Right Now series, Dr. Daniela Owen, Ph.D., explains the choice that we all have when we face situations that may make us anxious or fearful. This book is perfect for the uncertain times we face today and can be very effective in teaching children how to deal with their fears.
A Mother's Love by Marilee Mayfield. Psychologist's say that the most important thing we can do for our children is let them know they are loved, especially when the world around them seems to be falling apart. This beautifully written book will help your child understand the unconditional amount of love you have for them. This is a great book for getting back to what really matters.
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Join Mom Squad!
Thursdays from 6 - 7 PM
March 25
Don't miss getting to know this amazing group of parents who share the joys and challenges of raising a child or children with special needs. This is a positive, supportive environment focused around your concerns. Julie from ASCF and Family Partner's staff facilitate. Registration URL:
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Join other parents at our
FSO of Passaic County and ASCF
Support Group
Tuesdays, March 23, 30
8 PM
ALL WELCOME.
Register with Nina 973-979-0508
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Please contact ASCF if you need guidance or a listening ear. We have English and Spanish speaking consultants.
While we currently do not have an office, we are still here for you.
Assn. for Special Children & Families
POB 494, Hewitt, NJ 07421 973-728-8744
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Disclaimer: The Association for Special Children and Families does not provide or give Legal or Medical advice. ASCF does not endorse or recommend any one specific diagnostic or therapeutic regime, organization, opinion or methodology mentioned in this newsletter. We are not responsible for the content or information on any website given and do not endorse or recommend the views expressed as we have no control over the nature and content of those sites. |
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