Dear Laker Community,

When we think of the concept of mental healthcare, we often reflexively think of an individual seeking such services. While this is certainly accurate, a more clandestine—and often more challenging—component is easily overlooked: the perspective of mental health for each member of a person’s support system.

Our perspectives of mental health are influenced by our worldviews, including our experiences, cultures, and ideologies. Thus, when a friend, a child, a student, a colleague, or someone else close to us struggles, we understandably have our own response to the situation. We may attempt to minimize the magnitude of the issue. We may go into advice-giving or judgement mode. We may have an escalated emotional reaction ourselves. Or, we may provide solid support.  

A phrase I have repeated more than most throughout my career is, "We need to do our own work." It simply means that we need to understand why we respond in certain ways to certain situations. A question we need to ask ourselves is, “What is it about this type of situation that triggers anger, fear, or denial in me?” This reflection is valuable in any context, but within the realm of supporting our students’ mental health, it is crucial. 

In these moments, if we have insight into why we project our own lives, histories, and worldviews onto those we care about in need, we are already better prepared to help. This represents the first step in providing effective mental health support. The second is being able to recognize when we are having such a reaction, despite our best intentions. And the third step is remembering three magic words that can improve any situation: Validate. Validate. Validate.

Validation does not mean that we need to fully understand what someone else may be experiencing. It does not mean that we even agree that the distressing issue is a crisis. It simply means that we grasp how this is a crisis to the individual in distress. In that moment, it is not our story—it is theirs. Our role is to meet them where they are, emotionally.

A question as simple as, “Tell me what it’s like?”, can do more than we often realize. Or, “That is a lot for two shoulders to bear, how are you holding up?” Each response consumes less than ten seconds of our time and energy to say, but the support provided in this moment is immeasurable.

At Windermere Prep, supporting the mental health and well-being of our students is a shared commitment. I am here as a resource for our Laker community and am always happy to support, guide, or connect you with additional resources when needed. If you would like to schedule an appointment or learn more about the support available on campus, please use the appointment-booking link or QR code below.

Mr. Keith L. Sims, MA, LMHC, QS

Mental Health Therapist