During this pandemic I see emotional changes around and through me. With every change I see and feel the fear. I try to be strong for others but sometimes I also find myself with feelings of fear. Feelings of unworthiness that I’m not skilled enough or healthy enough to take on this battle. Feelings of doubt about what changes are coming. I worry that I don’t know how to be a solution.
I want to escape this, so I turn to the Bible.
Studying God‘s word is truth and it is my weapon in the battle against fear. I know that David trusted the Lord even in the most tremendously difficult circumstances. I see that God did not fail him and It is no different for me. The Lord responds to my wavering thoughts and He tells me to trust. I Recognize now that Satan is using my fear against me. Satan knows just how to get my mind questioning. Satan is pressing me to abandon God‘s will. He wants to rip the confidence of all that the Lord has given. Have I forgotten?
This is the gift God has given me. I am worthy. I should not doubt. If my fear is provided room to grow I will stop trusting God and his magnificent ability to provide. The beginning of the battle against Satan is recognizing these runaway emotions and destroying their roots. When I look closely at the fear, I realize it is not valid. My feelings have no real legitimacy.
Finally, I absorb the scripture and I know that I should refuse to carry the full burden. I know that it is not meant for me. I realize that through this adversity I can build a bridge to a deeper relationship with God. I learn to trust again. Now I am genuinely content.
Misty Wech, RN
ACHC Nursing Director