Reflection from Fr. Joseph

I’ve recently had an influx of requests for annulments. It’s always an interesting topic, so I thought I’d address it in today’s bulletin column, because there are some misunderstandings about what it is.

Marriage is an objective reality. What do I mean? I mean that something really occurswhen a marriage is contracted – an indissoluble bond is formed between two persons that cannot be broken or dissolved. It’s like table salt – salt is comprised of two elements: sodium and chlorine. When the two react together, they form a new compound (sodium chloride, or table salt). This is an objective reality – it’s not like the sodium and chlorine just kinda sit next to each other on your French fries. No, they actually form something new, and it’s very difficult to separate them again. Likewise, a valid marriage actually takes two persons and, by the power of grace and the intervention of God, creates a new reality: a marriage bond. This isn’t just a sentimental thought – it has real, though invisible, existence.

When a marriage sadly ends in divorce, the marriage bond is not broken. A civil divorce does nothing to change the objective reality of what marriage has created. So although John and Sally may be separated and divorced in the eyes of the law, in reality they are still bonded to one another.

So, then, what is an annulment? It is a Church investigation to determine whether a true valid marriage existed in the first place. There are several reasons why a marriage may be invalid, called impediments:

- A Catholic married someone outside of the Catholic Church

- One of the parties never intended the marriage to be permanent

(entered into it with the view of, “Oh, I can get out if things get bad.”)

- One of the partners felt pressured to get married, and didn’t enter into it with full freedom (for example, perhaps they got pregnant and parents pressured them to tie the knot)

- One or both of the parties intended never to have children (without the openness to life, a marriage is invalid)

- One of the parties was so immature that they did not understand the responsibilities of marriage.

- One of the parties had an issue that they never disclosed to their partner (mental illness, addiction, homosexual inclinations, criminal past, etc)

So, a Church Tribunal (the Church court) examines the marriage to see if it was valid or not. This does not deal with issues that occurred after the marriage (such as adultery). As tragic as it is that a marriage may break down due to such betrayals, it doesn’t invalidate the marriage per se. Rather, the Tribunal looks at whether the marriage was valid from the beginning. This is why they interview family members and friends of the couple to see if there were any “red flags” that people noticed, which might have made the marriage invalid.

An annulment, then, is not a “Catholic divorce”. It’s a declaration that there was no valid marriage to begin with.

The annulment process is often lengthy, involving a long application and a “marriage narrative” telling the story of your marriage. The Tribunal will then investigate, contacting witnesses, and seeing if there is clear evidence that the marriage was never valid. But it is also a very cathartic process that often leads to closure, regardless of the outcome.

If someone wishes to remarry in the Catholic Church after a divorce, an annulment is necessary. This is not just a hoop that the Church puts before people – it is based upon Jesus’ words in both Matthew 19 and Luke 16 where Jesus says that “if a man divorces his wife and marries another, he commits adultery.” Even the Church cannot change the objective reality of the marriage bond. There are no do-overs in the case of a valid marriage. Otherwise, the marriage vows wouldn’t really mean anything. To keep the integrity of the vows, we have to understand “until death do we part” really means what we say.

Sadly, people often think that this view is unmerciful and harsh. And, without a doubt, divorce is a painful reality that many of our parishioners have experienced. But just as the Church couldn’t say that the sky was red if it was really blue, so the Church cannot nullify something that exists in reality (the marriage bond). The Church must always remain faithful to Christ and His words, even His difficult teachings.

Since marriage is the perfect image of Christ’s love for the Church (see Ephesians 5), so marriage must have that same fidelity. Christ cannot desert His Church, no matter how unfaithful She has been; so couples are called to reflect that same faithfulness, even unto sacrifice and death. A difficult marriage might be the hill we are called to die on – but didn’t Jesus also die on a hill for His Bride?



If you have gone through the pain of divorce, I’d encourage you to reach out to Fr. Ukaj or me. We’d be happy to discuss with you whether or not you might be a candidate for an annulment, and walk with you on the process. Particularly if you have remarried outside of the Catholic Church, we want to help you have your marriage sanctified by the Sacrament of Matrimony (more on that next week). To find out more about what an annulment will entail, please see the Diocese of Bridgeport’s Tribunal website at http://www.dob-tribunal.com/annulment.html .

Tota Pulchra Marian Conference – Diocese of Bridgeport

An Evening with the All Beautiful Join us as we delve into the beauty and grace of Our Lady, the Blessed Virgin Mary. Be inspired by Dr. John-Mark Miravalle as he illustrates why Mary is the tota pulchra, the wholly fair woman, the all-beautiful; and by Fr. Justin Cinnante, O. Carm., who will share insights into Mary as Mother of the Eucharist, Mother of Beauty.

The conference will be held at St. Matthew Parish in Norwalk on September 13th. Two well respected Marian speakers are leading the program, Dr. John-Mark Miravalle and Fr. Justin Cinnante, O. Carm. It is followed by Mass celebrated by Bishop Caggiano, then, dinner, and adoration. We are very blessed that this conference is being sponsored by our diocese. Thank you.

For more information and registration, please click on

Tota Pulchra Marian Conference – Diocese of Bridgeport

Connecticut Catholic Men’s Conference

The Connecticut Catholic Men’s Conference will take place this year on September 27, 2025 at Holy Cross High School, CT. The Keynote speaker will be Dr. Ray Guarendi , CPM. This is a day of spiritual reflection, prayer, and fellowship with Catholic men from across the state. To access more information on this faith filled day please visit https://ctcatholicmen.org/.

If you wish to attend, the cost will be covered by St. Jude. 



For further questions please email Jim Bifulco at jbifulco@snet.net or call at 203-581-3071. This is an opportunity open to all the men of the parish. There may be a chance for carpooling also for this truly inspiring day.

LECTORS NEEDED!

We are in need of more good men and women to proclaim the Word of God at Mass! What a privilege it is to use your voice to proclaim God's saving works to His Church. Everyone is welcome - adults and high school teens. If interested, please contact the Parish Office at 203-261-6404 or ParishOffice@stjuderc.org to schedule your training with Deacon John and Bernice.

MONDAY ADORATION RESUMES!

Our regular Monday Eucharistic Adoration resumes on September 8th! Every Monday from Labor Day to Memorial Day, our parish hosts Eucharistic Adoration, that we may draw near to our Eucharistic Lord. We need:

• Guardians who can commit to one consistent hour each week, making sure Our Lord is never left alone
• Substitutes who can fill-in, in case someone is sick or absent.
• 
  

You can sign up in the back of church, or at this Sign-Up Genius: https://www.signupgenius.com/go/4090A45ABA62FA0F49-monday

And even if you are unable to commit, please just come and visit Our Eucharistic Lord!

As St. Josemaria Escriva said: "When you approach the Eucharist, remember that He has been waiting two thousand years for you."

A Few More Scenes from Labor Day Weekend's

Outdoor Christian Music Festival

The St Jude-St Stephen Seniors will resume their meetings on the 2nd Thursday of each month.

The September meeting will be on Thursday, September 11th at 1:00 PM in the St Jude Social Hall.

All are welcome. No need to register.



Contact Ellen Stevens with questions

ellenstevens@charter.net

Family News and Events

September Issue of Rooted Magazine

Here is the link for September's Rooted Magazine! 

We hope that everyone has had a great start back to school!

Knights of Columbus News

Tootsie Roll Drive

The Knights of Columbus are excited to announce that its annual campaign to raise funds to help adults, teens, and children with intellectual disabilities, known as the Tootsie Roll Drive, will be conducted over two weekends on September 13^th and 14^th and October 4^th and 5^th.

Knights of Columbus volunteers will be collecting donations in front of local businesses during the campaign. You can spot them wearing bright yellow aprons and handing out Knights of Columbus branded Tootsie Rolls in front of Stop & Shop, Capital Spirits and Dunkin Donuts in Monroe and Stop & Shop in Newtown.

The campaign is an important fundraising event and a community outreach opportunity for our parish. 100% of the donations collected will go toward Knights of Columbus programs helping people with intellectual disabilities. Last year the campaign was able to raise over $5,000 for Knights of Columbus programs including at the Southbury Training School, a local home for individuals with intellectual disabilities.

Volunteers are still needed to make this year’s campaign a success. The Knights of Columbus should check their email for the link to sign up.

Men’s Bible Study will resume on Saturday September 27th. All men are invited to join for a discussion-based Bible Study on Saturday mornings at 8am in the Monsignor Sabia Social Hall, as we study the week’s Sunday readings.

For more information, contact Bob Lux at mjrob08@gmail.com.

Blood Donation Drive Save the Date

Our next drive is Saturday, September 20 here at St. Judes. To donate, please visit www.redcrossblood.org and search for our drive.

GIFTOBERFEST! 

The Saint John XXIII Columbiettes of St. Jude Church in Monroe will be hosting their GIFTOBERFEST! fundraiser taking place throughout the month of October.

Proceeds from the fundraiser will go to various causes that the Columbiettes sponsor - such as special needs camperships, Hopeline, Christmas baskets for the disadvantaged and other local charitable organizations. 

GIFTOBERFEST! Is a raffle that consists of a daily drawing from October 1-31, 2025. Each day a gift card in various denominations will be awarded to a lucky winner. Participants can win multiple times. Raffle tickets will be $10.00 each and are good for the entire month.

The Columbiettes will be selling tickets after Saturday and Sunday masses at St. Jude’s Church at 707 Monroe Turnpike throughout September or if you would like to purchase a ticket and cannot attend mass, please contact Elizabeth Edgerton at 203-258-3354 or Jan DeMayo at 203-520-9796 or you can email eaedgerton24@gmail.com.

For additional information, please call (203) 258-3354 or e-mail eaedgerton24@gmail.com.

Food Pantry update

Our gratitude for your continued generosity. At this time the items in greatest need are: Mac and Cheese, canned tuna, and canned soup. 

Hopeline Pregnancy Center has a continued need for disposable diapers, etc.

They are currently low on sizes 3, 4 & 5, wipes and jars of baby food as well as Baby clothes (boys and girls, up to 18 months), Baby blankets, crib sheets, Onesies, socks, strollers, bottles and pacifiers and baby monitors.

They have also requested baby formula such as “Similac 360 Total Care”. Should you wish to help you can leave the diapers, etc. in the outer vestibule of the church.

Monetary donations, with checks made out to the Hopeline Pregnancy Center, as well as gift cards from Amazon, Target and grocery stores are most welcome. They may be mailed to: Hopeline Pregnancy Center, PO Box 110658, Trumbull, CT 06611.

As always, your continued support is greatly appreciated by Hopeline and our Knights of Columbus Council.

Please contact Bob Lux at mjrob08@gmail.com with any questions you may have.



Please remember in your daily prayers:

David Nicolett, Vincent Daniello, Joe Pinto, Zoey Frigo, Daniel Louis Bianco, Max, Hung Vu , Darryl Patterson, Dr. John Kezel, Francisca Testa & Family, Catherine Belanger, Tom Pleva, James Buturla, Patti F, Anne DeVita, Anna Harper, Jack Lane, Frank Kerekes, Antonia Tedeschi, Mary McDonald, Douglas Stanley, Jenn Katz, Susan W, Barbara Tranchese, Mary Lopresti, Lor C, Janet C, Larry Pisani, Becky M, Vincent Pisani, Greg, Kaiti and Cameron Kessler, Mildred Blasko, Michael Merola & Family, Father Krzysztof, Baby Henry Taylor, Garren Kiett, Viola Cleo Bradshaw, Alice Gumpert, Michael, Donna, Chrystal Archuletta, Chloe Capra, Lucy Hanson, Debbie Dragonetti, Jesse Hurst & Family, Maryann Lapinski, Joseph Laveneziana, Andrea Paddock, Nadine Alusik, Margarida Andrade, John, Jimmy Forno, Matthew Van der Wielen, George N., Milenka Gospic, Benjamin Gray, Chris McCarthy

Please join us in praying our Monthly Parish Intention..

Our Petition for September is:

  for Catechists and Students

We pray for all students as a new school year begins. 

We celebrate and honor the Ministry of Catechists who teach and form others in our Catholic faith. Our Religious Education classes begin September 21st,

Catechetical Sunday, dedicated this year to "Christ Our Hope".  

We ask Christ to bless all those attending Faith Formation Programs...

     We pray to the Lord

Mass Intentions for September 13 – September 21

Sat      Sept 13           4:30pm          The Lluch Family

Sun     Sept 14           7:30am          St Jude Parishioners

Sun     Sept 14           9:30am        Marica Jovic and Gojko Jovic

Sun     Sept 14           11:30am        Rita Venables

                                     Graciela DePelaez

                                      Helen Tuccio

       Mon    Sept 15           9:00am         Deceased members of the Tuccio

and Rapuano Family

Tue     Sept 16           9:00am         Emanuel Cambra

Wed    Sept 17           9:00am         Bill Thibodeau

Thu     Sept 18           9:00am         Andrew Henn

Fri       Sept 19           9:00am         Emanuel Cambra

Sat       Sept 20           4:30pm        Deceased members of the

Carlson and DelMastro Families

Sun     Sept 21           7:30am          St Jude Parishioners

Sun     Sept 21           9:30am         The Guerrera Family

Sun     Sept 21           11:30am        Luis and Elvira Ferreira and

Jennifer Cannon

                                     Doug Stevens

                                     Helen Tuccio

Tabernacle Candle: In memory of Andrew Henn

Weekday Masses (Monday thru Friday) will be in the main Church at 9 am and live streamed.

The Weekend Masses inside the Church are Saturday at 4:30 pm and Sunday at 7:30, 9:30 and 11:30. Only the Saturday Mass at 4:30 pm and the Sunday 7:30 am and 9:30 Masses are live streamed and may be viewed at https://www.stjuderc.org/view-masses

Saturday Rosary Sign up.

We have a wonderful way to prepare for Saturday Mass and that is to say the Rosary before Mass starts. We start 30 minutes before Mass so we start at 4:00 every Saturday.

Please join us as we pray. Also, please prayerfully consider joining this ministry.

If you would like to join you can sign up at https://www.signupgenius.com/go/10c0d4aa8ad2fa6fccf8-saturday#/

We look forward to you joining us as we pray the Rosary together.

First Friday

Eucharistic Adoration

“Come to me all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest”. Matthew 11:28-30



The time that we spend with Jesus in front of the Blessed Sacrament is the best time we will spend on earth. Please join us on the first Friday of every month from 7:00 to 8:00 PM.

Flame of Love Rosary

Thursday mornings after 9 am Mass

"Spread the effect of grace of thy Flame of Love over all of humanity"

flameoflove.us



Divine Mercy Chaplet

Wednesdays at 3 pm in the Church

"Jesus we Trust in You"

thedivinemercy.org

St. Jude Religious Gift Shop

St. Jude Religious Gift Shop is located downstairs in the Msgr. Sabia Social Hall. Fr. Joseph's Books and CD's are available in the Gift Shop. Also new items: Communion Gifts and cards, statues, rosaries and more.

Come in and browse. Call Fran Cambra 203-261-2573 or Parish Office 203-261-6404.

Confession Hours



Confessions on Saturday afternoon will be in the day chapel at 3:30 to 4:15 pm on Saturdays. Come take advantage of God's great mercy by coming to the Sacrament of Confession.



Confessions are also by appointment, please call 203-261-6404, to set up an appointment or email the office.