Reflection from Fr. Joseph

Ah, as we have recently passed Valentine’s Day, perhaps some of you reading this will have fond memories over your wedding day. Others may be eagerly anticipating that day, or may be admiring the gift of marriage without being called to it. Let’s talk about the Sacrament itself to see how a Catholic marriage is meant to be celebrated, and why it’s important to get married in the Church.

For a marriage to be a valid Sacrament, it needs to be done in a church with a priest or deacon officiating, with at least two witnesses. Interestingly, the priest or deacon is not the “celebrant” of marriage. Rather, the couple themselves minister the Sacrament to one another! Then why does it have to be done before a priest or deacon? Because the Church, through its minister, needs to “receive” the vows exchanged, and offer its blessing in return. Why does it need two witnesses to be valid? Because marriage is a public act – it causes something to exist (a family) which has a profound impact on society as a whole. Therefore, it is a public deed to exchange vows in marriage.

If a Catholic marries in front of a Justice of the Peace (or some other minister), the marriage is not valid (unless special, exceptional permission is given by the Bishop). A valid marriage causes something new to be created – marriages are not just a symbol of love; they actually cause a real, supernatural bond to exist between the couple. Thus, Catholics who marry outside of the Church lack that bond (in addition to lacking the sacramental grace), and thus are not married in reality in the sight of God.

However, the Church has a solution to this – it is called convalidation (sometimes called “getting one’s marriage blessed”). If you are in a union that is not a Sacramental marriage, please contact me so that we can work on making your union into a Sacrament!

It is the exchange of vows in front of the Church that makes the marriage into a reality. What do the vows consist in?

First, the priest/deacon will ask the couple if they have come here freely and without reservation. Free consent is the first and most fundamental element of the vows. No one can be pressured into a marriage (I did have an Indian couple ask me to do an arranged marriage…I had to decline, since it lacked the freedom necessary for a valid marriage!).

Then, the priest/deacon asks them if they intend this union to be permanent. Marriage is not a contract, but a covenant – a contract is an exchange of goods and services, which can be broken if the goods and services are not delivered. But a covenant is an exchange of persons – not to give the other person happiness, or a certain style of living, or a nice house and car, but to give one’s entire self to the other. By its very nature, a covenant cannot be broken, since the self-gift is total.

Finally, the priest/deacon asks them if they intend children, as the natural fruit of matrimonial love. Pope John Paul II, in his Theology of the Body, mentions four aspects of marital love: it must be free, total, faithful, and fruitful. We can see these elements in the vows: a love that is freely given to the other; a love that is total, holding nothing back; a love that is faithful until death do we part; a love that bears the fruit of holiness in the spouses, and the fruit of children (if God wills it).

The couple then exchanges their vows to one another, promising “to be faithful to you, in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health, to love you and to honor you all the days of my life.”

There are two powerful helps to marriage within the Sacrament itself. The first is that the vows exchanged means we have “given our word” to the other. In tough times, we can go back to those vows, exchanged solemnly before God, remembering that we ought to be men and women of our word.

But the second help is that every Sacrament contains within it the grace of God necessary to live it out well. In tough times, we can ask God for a fresh outpouring of the grace He gave on our wedding day. The grace continues to this day – to sustain, strengthen, and bless you in your relationship.

So much of this, though, sometimes seems idealized – and there are no marriages that are perfect. Yet God works through the messiness of life. A marriage can still make us holy even if it’s not perfect…stay tuned next week for the final installation of our series on marriage, for some practical tips on how a messy marriage can thrive with God’s help!

Ash Wednesday is February 22!

Prayer Services

7:30 - 12:15 - 5:30 - 8:30

Mass

9:00 am - 7:00 pm

It is with great joy that we invite you to participate in the many celebrations and activities planned throughout this coming year to celebrate our Parish 50th Anniversary. Please see the Schedule of planned events in our website. https://www.stjuderc.org/50-years.html

One In Christ – The 2023 Bishop’s Appeal

Your gifts at work

Future priests of the Diocese of Bridgeport receive comprehensive formation in theology, pastoral ministry, personal growth, and, most importantly, the spiritual life at seminaries chosen by the Bishop to best suit the needs of the seminarian and of the diocese. Preparation for the Priesthood takes anywhere from six to eight years, depending on the age and educational background of the man when he enters. All of our seminarians receive graduate degrees in theology prior to their ordination.  Through your generous gift to the Bishop's Appeal, the Diocese will be better able to support men who are discerning priesthood and may respond generously and courageously to that call. 

Thank you for your gift.

To make a gift, or for more information, please visit us at 2023BishopsAppeal.org, call (203) 416-1470 or scan with your phone.

Annual Bishop's Appeal Brochure and Home QR

Parish News

Ignatian Parish Pilgrimage

Please join us for the first phase of the Ignatian Parish Pilgrimage we are co-sponsoring with St. Stephen’s. It begins on Saturday morning, March 4^th at 10:30 in the Social Hall at St. Jude Church. It will be the first of four lectures led by Fr. John Murray, a Jesuit priest with the Murphy Center for Ignatian Spirituality at Fairfield University. A lecture is scheduled each Saturday morning during March.  Bring a friend. The Pilgrimage is an important part our Lenten journey for deepening our relationship with Christ, improving our relationship with each other, and helping us grow in personal holiness. Please see our parish website for more details.

Exodus 40

All parishioners are invited to go deeper this Lent with Exodus 40! Based off the popular Exodus 90 program of fasting, prayer, and almsgiving, this program invites parishioners to take commitments of prayer and sacrifice together - supporting one another through weekly Zoom check-ins and a weekly Rosary. Sign-ups will take place after all Masses the weekend of Feb 18-19 and 25-26. Here are the commitments, meant to spur a deeper love for Jesus Christ and our neighbor (see attached file):

Final Heart-to-Heart Adoration!

Start Lent off right with a night of encounter with our Eucharistic Lord! Our final Heart-to-Heart Family Adoration Night comes to St. Jude on February 25, with a talk from Fr. John Mary CFR, Confessions, Prayer Teams, and beautiful worship music. Free childcare! All are welcome!

Notes From the Music Ministry

Friends,

Just a few updates from the Music Ministry that I would like to share with you. If you have any questions about any of these notes, please stop by the organ before or after any Mass and I would be happy to chat.

Blessing Always,

Lou Vollono, Jr.

Director of Music & Organist

Mass Setting for Lent

Beginning on Ash Wednesday and lasting through Good Friday, you will find at the ends of each pew pieces of cardstock. On that sheet is the Mass Setting, otherwise known as the Mass Ordinaries, that we will be using during Lent. During this more penitent liturgical season, we will sing the Kyrie and of course the Alleluia is replaced with an acclamation. All you music you need is right before you to encourage your participation. We will also change the Holy, Holy (the Sanctus) to the familiar Latin Chant that should bring back some memories. I am often asked, "Why Latin?" Simply out, why not? It is the official language of our church, and has a rich tradition in our worship. We want to honor those traditions, those "chestnuts" if you will, and bring them back now and then. Please follow along and after a week or two, you will be great. Besides, "Why Latin?" Well, the Evil One hates Latin as it is the universal language of the church. It has been noted to be the best language, the most-effective language, for exorcisms to be conducted in, not the native language of the possessed. Latin.

Organ Update

After several months of negotiations and after the approval of our Parish Finance Council, our Cassavant Ferres Pipe Organ is in the que to undergo much-needed retrofitting. In layman's terms, the buttons known as stops that signal the organ to create a sound are not communicating with in that big box in the music area of the church known as the organ console. For example, 2 weekend's ago, and without my cueing, the set of pipes above where the organist sits randomly turned on. That was unexpected, and even I jumped! I spent last Friday in our church for several hours making some adjustments, and know that I apologize if the organ is loud; I am doing my best. I have made some changes of late and I hope you notice a change. The repairs will address some of the sound issues. We may also need to "revoice" the instrument for our church. While the console work is being done in Canada, we will be without an organ for at least 2 months. More updates to come!

Adult, Children's Choir, and Contemporary Choir

Now is a great time to consider stepping up and joining our group of volunteers in our Music Ministry. Please see me if you would like to sing, even seasonally, with the Adult Choir for Lent, Holy Week, and Easter. The Children's Choir, who did an amazing job on Christmas Eve, will be back for Easter. Let's expand that group of 12, shall we? Emails are forthcoming. Also, our Contermporary Choir is always looking to add to their dedicated group at the 4:00 P.M. Vigil Mass. What talents do you have that you can share? Perhaps you will answer the call to service this Lent and join us.

St. Stephen Bereavement Support Group

Have you suffered the loss of a special person in your life? Our Bereavement Ministry can offer you hope of coping with your grief. It is open to anyone you may know who needs help. The 10-week course with a guided workbook provided will begin on Tuesday, March 21st from 4:00-5:30pm. Registration is required. Please call the rectory at 203-268-6217. A call will be returned to you by one of the bereavement facilitators. 

Food Pantry Update



Items in greatest need at this time are pasta, jarred pasta sauces, peanut butter and jelly as well as canned fruit. Of course boxed children's cereal is always appreciated. Your support is greatly appreciated.

Floral Ministry Update

As we enter the Lenten Season, this coming Wednesday, Ash Wednesday, you will notice the arrangement at the center of the altar has several pieces that are symbolic of what the season should represent for all of us. Each symbol is designed to direct us to action during the Season of Lent.  The Praying Hands encourage us to turn more fervently to Prayer. The empty water jug and purple cloth are spurring reflection on the importance of Sacrifice and Almsgiving. The Crown of thorns, uniquely made in Israel from the stems of the Euphorbia Milli plant, grown near Jerusalem, is reminding us of the ultimate Sacrifice of Jesus shedding his blood for all of us.

As we gaze on this altar centerpiece, may we be able to point our minds and hearts to Christ’s suffering for us during the Season of Lent.

Bring home Saint Jude's traveling statue of the Holy Family starting this month, the month of the Holy Family!

Materials will be included to do a 7-day preparation for Consecration to the Holy Family. To learn more, visit: https://afc.org/family-consecration/

May God bless you and your family through the intercession of the Holy Family!

NEW LOCATION - PARISH CENTER MEETING ROOM

Pizza and Desserts served

EMAIL TO RSVP by Monday 2/20 so we can have enough food!

Do you have extra egg cartons?

St Jude's Kids Club is seeking donations of empty egg cartons for an April craft. If you have some that you would like to donate, please leave in the entryway next to the food pantry donations and label them "For kids club". Many thanks!

2023

CAMP ADORE

VACATION BIBLE SCHOOL

Summer with the Sacred Heart

June 26-30, 2023 8:30 am to 12:30 pm

for children entering Grades 1-6.

This year's theme is "Summer with the Sacred Heart"

Registration is now OPEN click here. Sign up early to secure a spot!

Email Jessica Iannotta if you are an adult or teen interested in volunteering.

Mom's Group Announcements

Next meeting this coming Thursday 2/23 at 7:30 pm. Note change to Thursdays and later start time.

Our next monthly mother's Zoom rosary is Wednesday 3/1 at 9 pm and will continue on the first Wednesday of every month e-mail Jessica Iannotta for more information.

Youth Encounter and Kid's Club Reminders

Next Encounter 2/25 & Next Kid's Club 3/5

Please remember in your daily prayers:

Marge Tranzillo, David Nicolett, Maria Bertone, Marie Micholovich, Vincent Daniello, Dyana vander Wielen, Joe Pinto, Zoey Frigo, Daniel Louis Bianco, Max, Hung Vu, Alfred Zawadski, Dr. John Kezel, Joseph Sheridan, Francisca Testa & family, Catherine Belanger, Stephen Henn, Manny Cambra, Bennett Gulyas, Tom Pleva, James Buturla, Violeta Shala, Vito Melfi, Paul Verespej, Patti F. , Anne DeVita, Anna Harper, Jack Lane, Robert Freeman, Frank Kerekes, Marian Nanchy, Rose C., Joseph T., Rosario Pacheco, Antonia Tedeschi, Richard Smith, Charles Metoyer, Liz Guaglianone

All healthcare workers, first responders, caregivers and the men and women in the military.

If you have anyone that you would like to add to the list, please call the office or email with the name to be added.

Please join us in praying our Monthly Parish Intention.

Our Petition for February is:

We pray for all Missionaries as we unite our prayers to their works asking Christ's grace to penetrate the hearts of those to whom they preach and baptize....

   We pray to the Lord

Upcoming Mass Intentions

Sat    Feb 18        4:00pm                Luis and Elvira Ferreira & Jennifer Cannon

Sun   Feb 19       7:30am                 St Jude Parishioners

Sun   Feb 19        9:30am                 Maria Emilia Monteiro

Sun   Feb 19        11:30am               Anna Musorafite

Mon  Feb 20        9:00am                 Beverly Roh

Tue   Feb 21       9:00am                 Anthony Palladino

Wed  Feb 22        9:00am                Mary Casey

Wed  Feb 22        7:00pm                Amanda Alarcon

Thu   Feb 23        9:00am                 Jose Rosa

Fri    Feb 24        9:00am                 Deceased members of the Creed Family

Sat    Feb 25        4:00pm                Laura Burns

Sun   Feb 26       7:30am                 Loretta Marie Paul Goldin

Sun   Feb 26        9:30am                 St Jude Parishioners

Sun   Feb 26        11:30am               Brett Southard

Weekday Masses will be in the main Church at 9 am and live streamed.

The Weekend Masses inside the Church are Saturday at 4:00 pm and Sunday at 7:30, 9:30 and 11:30. Only the Saturday Mass at 4:00 pm and the Sunday 7:30 am and 9:30 Masses are live streamed.

(Live-streamed Masses may be viewed at https://www.stjuderc.org/view-masses.html )

Rosary Making Ministry

The Rosary making ministry is making rosaries for the sick of the parish and anyone who would like one. We have been making hand knotted rosaries for the past year. If you would like to join us, we meet on Wednesdays at 1:30 in the social hall. Please contact Karen Talloni 203-952-3451 or email [email protected]

Men’s Bible Study

All men are invited to join for a discussion-based Bible Study on Saturday mornings at 8am in the School Meeting Room beginning September 17, as we study the Sunday readings. For more information, contact Bob Lux at [email protected].

Mary's Messengers Prayer Group Conveniently in between Wednesday’s Religious Education class sessions from 6-6:30 pm. We will learn to say the Rosary, Divine Mercy Chaplet, and other special prayers for the intentions of our families and Parish.

Flame of Love Rosary

Thursday mornings after 9 am Mass

"Spread the effect of grace of thy Flame of Love over all of humanity"

flameoflove.us

St. Jude Religious Gift Shop is located downstairs in the Msgr. Sabia Social Hall. Fr. Joseph's Books and CD's are available in the Gift Shop. Also new items: Gifts and cards, statues, rosaries and more.

Come in and browse. Call Fran Cambra 203-261-2573 or Parish Office 203-261-6404.

Confession Hours

Confessions on Saturday afternoon will be in the day chapel at 3:00 pm on Saturdays.  We are now offering Confession Weekend every first weekend of the month! Come take advantage of God's great mercy by coming to the Sacrament of Confession, offered before AND after every Mass starting the weekend of February 4/5!

Confessions are also by appointment, please call 203-261-6404, to set up and appointment or emailing.