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“MINDSET” Volume 1 Issue 2
Setting Boundaries in 2020
by Marie Corbin, Exec. Director
BSN, RN, R-DMT-C
Setting Boundaries can be very difficult for some and so easily for others; but I’d like to believe that if you have the awareness of what that means to you...then setting those standards for yourself and implementing them gets easier than you would have thought.
“A boundary is a limit or space between you and the other person; a clear place where you begin and the other person ends . . . The purpose of setting a healthy boundary is, of course, to protect and take good care of you” (n.d.). and a complete lack of boundaries may indicate that we don’t have a strong identity or are enmeshed with someone else” according to IPFW/Parkview Student Assistance Program.
I have included a couple of examples for you, to break it down a little more and to provide some self-care boundaries and tips. These relationship boundaries can include Doctor -Patient, Teacher-Student, Parent-Child, Professional-Personal and of course Couples-Personal Relationships.
The first part of setting boundaries is examining the boundaries that already exist (or are lacking) then establishing a consequence and sticking with it if the boundary is crossed.
For example you’re a Nurse in a busy clinic and while you are gathering your history and physical data the male patient makes multiple passes at you, the Nurse-Patient boundaries has been crossed since it is common knowledge with all your patients dating them is not allowed. So, taking appropriate consequence actions in this case is totally up to the professional and enforcing it would send a clear message for him and other patients as well as providing some valuable self-care for the nurse.
“Setting boundaries is an important part of establishing one's identity and is a crucial aspect of mental health and well-being. Boundaries can be physical or emotional, and they can range from being loose to rigid, with healthy boundaries often falling somewhere in between”
Recovery & Boundaries
Whether we are talking about our mental health recovery or recovery from a Dual Diagnosis ( a mental health condition and a substance abuse secondary diagnosis) keep this in mind as cited by (Raynor), Here is another example,
In the context of recovering from substance abuse, self-care can include “meaningful connection with recovery support and children, taking care of physical health, maintaining spirituality, healthy eating, exercise, journaling, continuing education, staying busy, sponsorship, establishing boundaries, self-monitoring, abstinence, and dealing with destructive emotions” (Raynor et al., 2017).
“Rather than fostering resentment, one can instead try to set and communicate their boundaries.”
Self-Care Tips for Healthy Boundary Setting.
Having honest dialogue about your needs is priority one. Sometimes that may require outside help like Dance Therapy, Expressive Arts, Counseling, Alano meetings, Pastoral counseling and so on, but the goal should always be honesty with self along with the willingness to stand up for yourself. This promotes improved self confidence, self love and better communication with those you interact with.
n this newsletter I have also included worksheet links for you to assess and test your knowledge about your personal boundaries.
Setting healthy Personal Boundaries
Drawing Effective Personal Boundaries
Whittfield, Charles, L., M.D. Boundaries and Relationships: Knowing, Protecting and Enjoying the Self HCI Books, (1993)
“Take Care in Caring for you too” mc