What do you call a cleaning skeleton?
The grim sweeper.
Why do ghosts go on diets?
So they can keep their ghoulish figures
Where does a ghost go on vacation?
Where does a mummy go on vacation?
The Dead Sea.
Why didn't the skeleton go to the scary movie?
He didn't have the guts.
Why did the vampire read the newspaper?
He heard it had great circulation.
Why did the ghost go into the bar?
For the Boos.
Why don’t mummies take time off?
They’re afraid to unwind.
Why did the headless horseman go into business?
He wanted to get ahead in life.
Why do demons and ghouls hang out together?
Because demons are a ghoul's best friend!
Why did the ghost starch his sheet?
He wanted everyone scared stiff.
What's a ghost's favorite dessert?
Why don’t mummies have friends?
Because they’re too wrapped up in themselves.
Who won the skeleton beauty contest?
Where do ghosts buy their food?
At the ghost-ery store!
Why couldn’t the mummy go to school with the witch?
He couldn’t spell.
How do vampires get around on Halloween?
On blood vessels.
What’s it like to be kissed by a vampire?
It’s a pain in the neck.
How can you tell when a vampire has been in a bakery?
All the jelly has been sucked out of the jelly doughnuts.
What do you get when you cross a vampire and a snowman?
Why do skeletons have low self-esteem?
They have no body to love.
Know why skeletons are so calm?
Because nothing gets under their skin.
What do you call two witches who live together?
How do mummies tell their future?
They read their horror-scope.
What do skeletons order at a restaurant? '
There once was a bad ghoulish goblin.
Thump, thump on a crutch he was hobblin’.
It was Halloween night.
He dared to give a fright.
But he fell to the ground; he was wobblin’.
Mystic Magination Night!
On one mystic, magic night,
Jack O Lanterns glowing bright,
kids with bags of candy sweet,
roam door to door and street to street,
all dressed up for trick or treat!
Wizards with wands, pirates with hooks,
monsters and clowns with spooky looks,
kings and queens with capes and crowns,
a princess in her royal gown,
witches with warts and fairies with wings
movies stars with sparkling rings,
vampires with fangs that bite,
ghost that boo all dressed in white.
Imaginations taken flight,
on that one mystic, magic night.
Oh, the fun of Halloween,
be young or old or in between!