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What's Really Going On?
Let's pull back the curtain on life as a fully paid-up member of Overthinkers Anonymous.
Behind all that apparent deep thinking often lurks:
- A desperate need for certainty
- A desire to control the outcome
- Insecurity
- Distrust of ourselves, others or life itself
- Fear of failure
- Difficulty committing
- Perfectionism
- Risk aversion
- Good old-fashioned fear wearing a clever disguise
To be fair, major life decisions deserve thought and consideration.
Choosing a new direction, ending a relationship, starting a business or moving house shouldn't be decided by throwing darts at a vision board.
But there comes a point where healthy reflection slips into anxiety, catastrophising and the mental equivalent of repeatedly opening the fridge in the hope that new food has appeared.
For academics, philosophers and poets-in-residence, endless pondering may eventually produce a dissertation, a masterpiece or at least a very long footnote.
For the rest of us?
It's often a halting mechanism.
A sophisticated form of avoidance.
Procrastination wearing spectacles and carrying a clipboard.
As a coach, I might give a client some homework and check in a week later.
"How did you get on?"
"I've been reflecting."
Translation:
"I've done absolutely nothing but I'd like it to sound intellectual."
Rarely Is Overthinking a Good Investment
Overthinking is like throwing a stone into a washing machine, selecting Fast Spin and then somehow jamming the door.
Round and round your thoughts go.
You revisit every possibility, every risk, every conversation and every imagined disaster.
Yet remarkably, after six hours of mental gymnastics, you've usually arrived exactly where you started.
Like a hamster powered entirely by anxiety, you're expending enormous energy while travelling precisely nowhere.
Meanwhile opportunities pass by.
Life moves on.
Invest in Hope, Not Doubt
If you've recognised yourself as a card-carrying member of Overthinkers Anonymous, here are a few ways to escape the rabbit hole and get back into life's groove.
Get it out of your head and onto paper.
Map out every option, fear and possibility. Draw arrows. Join the dots. Often the answer becomes obvious once it stops ricocheting around your skull.
Get yourself a Download Doula.
Find a trusted friend who can sit with you while you verbally empty the contents of your mind. Better still, get a coach. Thoughts sound very different when spoken aloud.
Ask a better question.
Instead of "What's the worst that could happen?" ask, "What's the best that could happen?" Your brain is remarkably obedient. Give it a better brief.
Project forward.
What happens if you do nothing? Fast-forward five years and take a look. Now run the film again with you taking the risk. Which version feels more alive?
Make peace with discomfort.
Growth and comfort rarely share a postcode. Feeling uncomfortable doesn't mean you're making the wrong decision. Often it means you're making a brave one.
Most importantly... take a step.
Sign up. Apply. Ask. Start. Commit.
Action creates clarity.
Thinking rarely does.
You don't need certainty before you move forward. You simply need enough courage to take the next step and trust yourself to handle whatever happens next.
After all, life isn't waiting for you to think about it a bit more.
Ready to Stop Thinking About Living and Start Living?
Book a free chat with me today.
Let's get you out of your head and back into your life. ❤️
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