HaKol
The Voice of the
Pelham Jewish Center
January 2025/ Tevet 5785
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Leadership Messages
Rabbi Benjamin Resnick
Education Director
Ana Turkienicz
PJC President
Lisa Neubardt
HaKol Editor
Barbara Saunders-Adams
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Congregant News
& Donations
Book Notes
Barbara Saunders-Adams
Congregant's Corner
. Meredith Price
. Ana Turkienicz
Food For Thought
Share a Simcha
Additional High Holiday
& Related Donations
Tributes & Donations
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Dear Friends,
This past Sunday, as many of us gathered in the library at the PJC to pack up donations for our MLK day of service, former hostages Emily Damari, Romi Gonen, and Doron Steinbrecher were released, at long last, by the monsters who had ripped them from their homes. It was, of course, a momentous occasion in the Jewish world. We wheeled one of our TVs into the library so that we could watch the coverage live–grainy images of the women as they were given over to the Red Cross and then finally brought under the protection of the IDF, broadcasters choked or elated with emotion, images of cheering crowds in Hostage Square in Tel Aviv. The videos of the women embracing their families, which did not become available for a few more hours, are profoundly moving. As Jews, we should all see them and we should try to share in the joy the families and we should say shechechiyanu because that’s the blessing we say whenever we live to see a day that we really might not have. I have since watched them several times. I feel grateful that I was able to share them with my children.
Our collective joy on their return–apparently in relatively good physical health–is, of course, complicated by the fact that their freedom was secured, in part, by the release of scores of murderous terrorists. The Jewish world is small. Just as the hostages are not strangers to us–my mother-in-law lived for a time with Keith Siegel, who is set to be released, God willing, during the first phase of the ceasefire agreement–so too the villains are not abstractions. They have scarred and taken the lives of people we know and care about. Twenty-two years ago, one of those villains killed my friend Michael Simon’s fiance, Marla Benett, of blessed memory, along with 9 others as they were having lunch at Hebrew University. Now, as Michael posted on facebook the other day, her killer will be a free man.
The fact that the pain of that is excruciating–and that it raises profound moral and strategic questions–is by no means a new or original observation. Indeed, it has been a persistent feature of Israeli life since at least 1985 and it was part of Jewish history long before that. And when it comes to this issue, I’m sorry to say–truly sorry to say–that I don’t have any real answers. And to the extent that Jews, from time to time, do look to their rabbis for answers–or at least look to them for some counsel as they struggle to make sense of the world–I feel as though I am not fully able to discharge the duties of my office. Like a doctor faced with a terrible disease, I find that while I can identify the malady, I can really offer no cure, no guidance about how, exactly, we should think about all of this, or what we should feel. The moral imperative to redeem our captives runs up against the moral imperative to see justice served and to protect our people from future harm, and this seems to me the very definition of tragedy in the Hegelian sense, which is not a situation in which evil triumphs over good, but instead, according to the great German philosopher, a situation in which two goods cannot coexist. I suppose we can feel many things about the fact that daughters being reunited with their mothers sometimes means murderers walk free–joy, anger, gratitude, resentment, to name a few.
But I do take some comfort in the fact that our tradition, perhaps in its great wisdom, also refrains from offering crystal clear instructions in these matters but instead bears witness to the pain of living without good options. So in one breath–in the same chapter of the Mishneh Torah and separated by only a few lines!–Rambam says אֵין לְךָ מִצְוָה רַבָּה כְּפִדְיוֹן שְׁבוּיִים–there is no mitzvah greater than the redemption of captives–and also אֵין פּוֹדִין אֶת הַשְּׁבוּיִים בְּיָתֵר עַל דְּמֵיהֶן מִפְּנֵי תִּקּוּן הָעוֹלָם–we do not redeem captives for exorbitant prices because of tikkun olam, so that enemies will not race to capture them. How are we to make sense of that juxtaposition? And how do we square it with Talmud’s famous dictum: וְכָל הַמְקַיֵּם נֶפֶשׁ אַחַת מִיִּשְׂרָאֵל מַעֲלֶה עָלָיו הַכָּתוּב כְּאִלּוּ קִיֵּם עוֹלָם מָלֵא–anyone who saves a single Jew is like one who saves the entire world.
It’s possible, I think, that we are not meant to and that Rambam means to communicate that not all of our problems–neither in halakhah nor in life–are soluble. And, in the wake of such knowledge, perhaps we can only turn to his more mystically inclined colleagues, who wrote in the Zohar, בְּכִיָיה תְּקִיעָא בְּלִבָּאִי מִסִּטְרָא חֲדָא, וְחֶדְוָותָא בְּלִבָּאִי מִסִּטְרָא אָחֳרָא–weeping sounds like a shofar in one chamber of my heart while rejoicing sounds like a shofar in the other. That seems about right to me–
Brachot,
Rabbi Benjamin Resnick
Ben
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Education Director
Ana Turkienicz
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“Everything was created by G-d through speech, as the verse states, “By the word of God were the heavens created (Nehemia 9:6)”...If not for the (Divine) life force within the speech (that is imparted in the physical) nothing would exist. This Divine life force within our food is the taste that is sweet to the palate...When a person eats or drinks, the spark (Divine life force which is the taste in the food) becomes part of that person’s life power (האדם של חיותו) and gives them energy. If we believe with complete belief that this (taste which enters us) is spiritual sustenance and is G-d’s Divinity, may He be blessed, which is clothed in (the food) and if we are mindful of this...then we also lift this spark of Divinity which was in exile (in the physical) up to God...For this is the main aspect of our service to G-d.”
Rabbi Menachem Nachum of Chernobyl (1735-1798)
In the Jewish calendar, we are currently in the month of Tevet, the month between Hanukkah and Tu Bishvat - two Jewish holidays connected with specific foods. It is also the month when my family marks my grandma Polly’s yahrzeit, which falls on 3 Tevet.
I learned much of my Judaism and what it means to be Jewish in my Bubby Polly’s kitchen. When I was growing up in Brazil, I did not attend a Jewish Day school nor a Hebrew School. I studied in the Brazilian Public School system, which at that time used to be quite remarkable. However, when a Jewish holiday approached, my mother would pull me out of school for one day before the holiday date and drop me off at my Bubby Polly’s home, under the pretext that “grandma needs your help in her kitchen, preparing the holiday foods”. There, young Ana accompanied Bubby Polly to the shochet, the ritual slaughterer, while holding 6 chickens - three in each hand - to be prepared for the ritual meals of Pesach, or Rosh Hashanah. Or where I was given a small apron that Bubby had sewn especially for me, exactly like hers, and on the seat of a wooden chair I would open the dough for the potato varenekes or cheese blintzes that she would be preparing for the holiday of Shavuot (Shvues in my bubby’s mameloschen- Yiddish). She would tell me the stories from her shteytel (small village) Khorsun in Ukraine, how they prepared for the holidays, and sing to me beautiful songs in Yiddish that still make me tear up whenever I happen to hear them again.
I feel utterly grateful for my mother’s wisdom for deciding that one day in Bubby’s Kitchen would be worth missing a day of regular school, and so blessed for my Bubby’s storytelling talent. It was during those magical moments spent helping grandma prepare for the Jewish holidays that my Jewish identity began to take shape, and my palate was introduced to the Divine connection between our traditional foods and the survival stories of our ancestors.
Food holds a special place in Judaism, transcending nourishment to serve as a bridge between the past and present, the sacred and the mundane. Through dietary laws, holiday feasts, and symbolic dishes, Jewish foods reinforce identity, connect us with our history, and pass our traditions from generation to generation.
That is why we introduced “Bubby’s Kitchen” as an integral part of the LC curriculum. Bubby’s Kitchen was inspired by my personal experiences in my grandma’s kitchen, which continue to make any Jewish meal a transcendental experience for me, even though many years passed since that little girl worked the rolling pin on the seat of my grandma’s kitchen wooden chair. Although it is impossible to reproduce the exact smells, sounds, and tastes from Grandma Polly’s kitchen, the PJC kitchen is becoming that magical space where Jewish foods and our students’ palates connect and spark.
Bubby’s kitchen happens every Thursday from 4:00-5:30, and is taught by our own new Bubby, Morah Betty Moallem, who just became a grandma this past week! Mazel Tov! Classes come in for 30 minute sessions and are introduced to a Jewish dish connected to a Jewish community, a specific holiday or historic event for the Jewish people, going “Around the world with Bubby’s Kitchen". In order to learn about the different Jewish communities, we invited congregants to tell about their memories in the countries they were born. For example, in past years, Alain Sasson came to teach our children about his experiences growing up in Algeria, and Aviva Arens, a teacher at the Leffel School in White Plains, taught our students about Jewish life in Afghanistan.
Last year, we created a special curriculum, connecting the Torah portions in Genesis and Exodus to specific foods. We called it “Cooking with the Torah”, sourcing natural ingredients and trying to imagine what our biblical ancestors might have eaten during their time. This year, we are learning about Jewish food around the world and introduced one more improvement to our Bubby’s Kitchen program, inviting PJC members to come and share their “bubby’s” favorite recipe. So far we are so grateful to learn from Beth Yelsey about her aunt Rhoda Freedman’s rugelach, from Melanie Stern about her mother Olga Stern’s blintzes, and how to make pickled dill cucumbers from Jessica Winquist. We have more guests lined up to teach us, including Hildy Martin, Andrea Rothberg, Jill Goldenberg, and Alyssa Bernstein. We also learned from Morah Betty’s husband, Ilan Moallem, how to make aruq, a traditional Iraqi dish. Last week, students learned from Morah Betty and Rabbi Resnick how to make the most delicious and authentic falafel - the national food of Israel - after learning from our Shinshin Ohad about “Operation Dugo” - a new Israeli tradition to eat falafel every year on January 18 to commemorate the survival of Jews after the Holocaust.
Jewish holidays feature specific foods that carry deep historical and spiritual meanings. On Passover, for example, matzah recalls the Israelites' hasty departure from Egypt, when there was no time for dough to rise. The bitter herbs symbolize the bitterness of slavery, while the sweet charoset represents the mortar used by enslaved ancestors. Each bite is a sensory reminder of the Exodus, enabling participants to relive the journey to freedom. Similarly, the fried foods of Hanukkah, such as latkes and sufganiyot, commemorate the miracle of the oil that lasted eight days in the rededicated Temple.
Beyond holidays, food serves as a thread connecting Jewish people to our diverse cultural heritages. From Ashkenazi gefilte fish to Sephardic tagines, Jewish cuisine reflects the diaspora’s adaptations to local ingredients and flavors while maintaining a core connection to Jewish law and tradition. These dishes tell stories of migration, resilience, and creativity, making every meal an act of remembrance.
Food in Judaism is more than sustenance; it is a profound expression of faith, culture, and memory. By partaking in traditional meals and observing dietary laws, we honor our ancestors, reinforce our spiritual commitments, and pass down a legacy that is as flavorful as it is enduring. As Rabbi Abraham Joshua Heschel would say, "A Jew does not eat to satisfy his hunger. He eats to sanctify the meal."
If you would like to sign up to come teach our kids about your Bubby’s best recipe, please send me an email to: edudir@thepjc.org; we would love to learn about your favorite Jewish dish and how it connects you to a specific time and place in the golden chain of Jewish tradition and history.
Wishing you and your families many good reasons to enjoy and cook magical meals together, and praying that our hostages will soon be able to eat from their bubby’s favorite recipes again,
With love,
Ana
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“Do you think people who run marathons know that they don’t have to?”
--Unknown
No, they don’t. People who run have an odd relationship with running and
even more so with long-distance racing. The runner psyche is peculiar and
hard to analyze. I think the medical diagnosis is meshuggeneh.
I really like this question because, to me, underneath the humor and bit of
sarcasm, this question is talking about choice. It’s a reminder that we have
agency in the decisions we make.
The new year started almost three weeks ago and I have been part of
many conversations about resolutions; what kind of choices do we want to
make to make our lives better, easier, healthier, happier, simpler, etc. Over
the holidays, I read a lot about how, instead of focusing on things we will
not do in 2025, we should instead think about things we will do. The idea is
to be less judgmental of our prior behaviors. Rather than beating ourselves
up about habits we don’t like, we should instead consider those things we
want to bring into our routines. Be additive, not subtractive.
For instance, for 2025, my resolution should not be to give up Diet Coke at
lunch. My resolution should be to add water to my lunch routine. I get the
psychology. The water will be so good and satiating that I won’t want the
Diet Coke. I will choose not to drink it -- I will not deprive myself of it. I get it.
As I write this, our world is bracing for significant change. At midnight
tonight, the Israeli/Hamas cease-fire will officially be in effect.
Approximately 36 hours later, we will officially have a new President of the
United States. No matter where you stand on these events, the following
statements are true. Both these events are complicated. Both are history
making, frustrating and deserving of respect. Both are fraught with layers of
unknowns. Both are guaranteed to leave large groups of people unhappy.
Both will forever impact the course of governance.
This is where I want to think more carefully about my choices. I am
choosing not to go down the rabbit hole of all that can go wrong. I have
spent too much time there in these last few years, months and weeks and
am opting out.
Instead, I am choosing to be optimistic. I am choosing to consider a rabbit
hole where things go well. Where I am pleasantly surprised and
encouraged. I am choosing things that are by their very nature happy.
Hooked on Havdalah at the PJC on January 25, Bowling at Bowlero in
White Plains with PJC friends on February 8 and cooking dinner with Rabbi
Resnick for everyone who joins in for the PJC Family Friday Shabbat
dinner on February 28.
I encourage you to make these choices, too. I hope you do. You may also
choose to run. Maybe even a marathon. But not because you have to.
I
Lisa
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HaKol Editor
Barbara Saunders-Adams
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Dear Friends,
Studying Torah or other Judaic sources in pairs, chevruta, has been rewarding for me. Chevruta means 'friendship" or 'partnership' and is a deeply traditional form of Jewish learning in which two people explore Jewish texts together.
In European religious schools called cheder, students paired up to read and translate Jewish texts. This method of study enables one to test one's knowledge by explaining what you learned to your partner and receiving immediate feedback from someone you trust.
Once a week for an hour on Zoom, I have the privilege of studying in chevruta with Rabbi Resnick. It's an hour that I look forward to every week. I choose the topic - the Joseph story (our current endeavor), Yehuda Amichai's poetry, King David, the Hebrew prophets, or the Song of Songs - and we study a text in English and Hebrew. We delve into the topic sharing ideas and questions. I always learn something new or insightful. Sometimes, our chevruta discussions make it into the Rabbi's dvar Torah!
Although the Rabbi loves to teach, he's also a good listener. He doesn’t aim to intimidate, rather he aims to understand. While I am usually tongue-tied and unable to express my thoughts in public, in Rabbi Resnick's presence, I am unafraid to think out loud. It feels to me like a true meeting of minds.
If you are interested in joining a chevruta, reach out to Kathy in the PJC Office.
Barbara
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The Best Place On Earth
by Ayelet Tsabari
I love this short story collection, The Best Place On Earth. Ayelet Tsabari is a "writer's writer". Her characters jump off the page and tweak your emotions. Her prose is beautiful. In the story, "Below Sea Level" she writes," The desert had always made David uncomfortable, how wide and open and vast it was, its landscape hard and bony, like knuckles on a fist. And there was the silence, and the deadly heat -- a monster ready to open its mouth and swallow him whole."
Tsabari depicts the Mizrachi Israeli experience with warmth, humor and astute observation. Her characters are achingly alive. Ironically, the title story, "The Best Place On Earth" does not refer to Israel, but rather to British Columbia. Nevertheless, the story of two Yemenite sisters, Naama and Tamar, explores what it means to be Israeli in Israel or in the diaspora.
"Brit Milah" portrays the generational and cultural gap between a traditional Mizrachi grandmother and her modern Israeli daughter, who not only resides in Toronto, but also chooses not to circumcise her only grandson.
"Borders" follows two teenage girls who go to Eilat the summer before the army. Na'ama grew up in the Sinai before it was returned to Egypt. She ponders the arbitrariness of borders in the Middle East. "To her left, a chain-link fence descended into the water, as though the sea could be divided, as though water didn't flow between the two countries It seemed like such an arbitrary place to stop, to separate the land and the sea and the mountains, when it was clearly the same landscape, the same sea."
The story "Casualties" provides a taste of what it is like to be a Mizrachi female soldier in Tzahal, the Israeli Defense force. And in the story, "Invisible", Tsabari depicts the life of a Philippine caretaker whose visa has expired and must hide to continue living in Israel. Her friendship with a former Israeli soldier, the sole survivor of his unit, who hides out with the family she works for is beautifully depicted.
I highly recommend this short story collection.
Barbara
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The Lieberman family had an amazing trip to Israel over the holiday break! We brought a large stack of letters with Chanukah wishes and notes of gratitude written by the PJC Learning Center students and distributed them to soldiers that we encountered in our travels.
The first picture shows a large group of soldiers who were having training at an historical site called Kastel which was a battle site in the War for Independence. These soldiers were paratroopers and they were very appreciative of the letters! Our cousins who have lived in Israel and speak Hebrew helped to translate.
We also gave some letters to soldiers that we met on Ben Yehuda Street and also in the shuk the name for an Israeli market.
Meredith
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Oliver and Casper Leiberman handing out the PJC Learning Center's Chanukah Greetings to Israeli soldiers.
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“The hour calls for moral grandeur and spiritual audacity.”
Abraham Joshua Heschel, in a telegram to John F. Kennedy,
on the Eve of the March on Washington, 1963.
The families of the Learning Center and PJC congregants got together on Sunday 1/19 to mark MLK Day packing hygiene supply kits to be donated to the needy through Westchester Jewish Community Services.
We packed 60 hygiene kits as we watched the moving news from Israel - three hostages were liberated at exactly the same time. While Am Israel celebrated the return of Romy, Emily and Doron to their families, the PJC families celebrated by performing a big mitzvah! Yasher Koach to all who donated and participated to make this world a little better.
Ana
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Opinion The Washington Post 12/27/2024
My son was murdered in Israel. I finally found a reason to live.
By Michal Halev
Michal Halev, an Israeli American and former facilitator of women’s circles and emotional counseling, is a mother.
On the evening of Oct. 11, 2023, just days after the tragedy of Oct. 7, my world came to a standstill. I learned that Laor, my beloved only child, was one of 364 concertgoers killed at the Nova festival where he was celebrating life, music and the companionship of his friends.
At that moment, I entered a chapter of life I had never imagined: being the living mother of a dead child.
Since then, I have embarked on a journey to search for meaning and for a reason to live in a world without my child. He was 20, over 6-foot-4 — our “Gentle Giant,” you could always pick him out in a crowd. He was a loving and gentle young person, a generous friend always caring for the well-being of others, who loved music and began his career as a DJ. I began to ask: How could his death not be meaningless?
I only started to peek out of my den of pain once I connected with new friends: the extended family of the bereaved — a family that none of us chose to belong to. I then met peers from the Parents Circle-Families Forum, a group of more than 750 bereaved Palestinians and Israelis who have lost an immediate family member to the conflict — and, perhaps most notably, have found solace in their shared belief that Israelis and Palestinians must speak with one voice to bring an end to violence, to find reconciliation and to make peace.
In September, the forum asked me to speak publicly for the first time about Laor’s death. I hesitated, but realized I wanted to do it. I wanted to share my story — and his story.
My peers and I spoke at a rally in Union Square in New York. We traveled more than 5,000 miles from where I lost my son. We came together to talk freely about ending the war and returning hostages. And when I finished speaking, still trembling from the experience of exposing my pain in front of strangers, a fellow bereaved Palestinian approached me and asked permission to embrace in a hug.
His name was Arab Aramin and he wanted to give me a hug from son to mother. At that moment, a shiver of excitement ran through me from the closeness and from his courage. His decision to bestow such a simple yet priceless gift made me realize I have not stopped being a mother for a moment. This is an enormous power, and I have full control of when I choose to use it.
Weeks later, I joined an online meeting of the forum’s women’s group. One of the Palestinian women stopped midsentence to say she had just heard an explosion near her house. She did not know where her son was. She apologized and left the meeting to look for him.
My heart was with that Palestinian mother. I was thrown back to the excruciating days when we did not know what happened to Laor — endless terror and chaos, vacillating between hope and despair.
For me, those moments ended with the news that no mother should hear — neither Israeli nor Palestinian.
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"Share a Simcha" allows congregants to share their news with our PJC community. Please submit news about family members -- engagements, births, job updates, kid achievements, community acknowledgements and any other milestones -- to the HaKol Editor, Barbara Saunders-Adams.
. Mazal Tov to our January Birthday Celebrants:
Julian Faith, Elaine Prager, Sophie Lee, James Mazur, David Samuels, Lisa Teitell, Danielle Gretz, Ellen Wirchin, Dana Wellesly-Stein, Daniel Hovaness, Mitchell Goldenberg, Jessica Hochberg-Horvath, Michael Bowen, Jacob Fallberg, Rebecca Schwarz, Kaylee Levine, Penelope Garvett, Jason Glick, Emma Schwartz, Anna Shampanier-Bowen, Jennifer Gerber, Samantha Bernstein, Deborah Korenstein, Hallie Myerson, David Eliezer, Catherine Levine, Sandra Goldman, Adar Marcus, Jessica & Cabell Brown, Maurice Owen-Michaane, Sage Winquist, Isaac Lief, Stephanie Prager, Eliana Herzog, Marjut Herzog, Sofia Schneider, Mark Hochberg, Jordan Klebanow, Emily Glickman,
. Mazal Tov to Sheldon & Gloria Horowitz on their 60th Wedding Anniversary.
Yom Nisu'in Sameach!
. We celebrate the release of the first three hostages after the ceasefire: Emily Damari, Romi Gonen and Doron Steinbrecher
Share a Simcha is a regular HaKol feature, so keep your news and updates coming!
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For Additional Holiday Giving By Our Congregants,
We Honor the Following Families
Leaders ($5000-$9,999)
Rebecca & Matthew Schwarz
Principals ($3,600 - $4,999)
Sam & Laura Temes
Guardians ($2500-3,599)
Diane & Larry Cohen
Promoters ($1,800 - $2,499)
Spencer & Ronnie Barback
Benefactors ($1,000-1,799)
Liz Tzetzo & David Ploski
Karen Dukess & Steve Liesman
Patrons ($500 -$999)
Glyn Morgan & Mercedes Castiel
Susan Davis
Eleanor Dreyfus
Mark Hochberg
John & Leah Leonard
Daniel Perkis & Eleanor Einzig
Melanie & David Samuels
Joan & Alain Sasson
Ana & Neco Turkienicz
Sponsors ($250-$499)
Arthur & Lois Katz
Richard Pine & Cheryl Agris
Anne Bresnick & Steve Almo
Meryl Glass-Druckerman
Jonathan & Tina Kaspar
Iris Kasten
Virginia Herron-Lanoil
Darren & Claudia Lee
Adrian Moshe
Doris-Patt Smith
Steven & Heather Schneider
Peter & Suzanne Wies
Friends ($100-$249)
Adam & Jeniece Ilkowitz
Mimi Steinberg
Supporters ($18-$99))
Greg & Theresa Breskin
Yana & Henry Elkin
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Tributes
Donations made to Leket in honor of Gloria and Sheldon Horowitz's anniversary
- Bob and Sandra Goldman
- Michael and Joyce Wechsler
- Roger Krulak and Family
- Benjamin Resnick and Philissa Cramer
- Marjut and Jonathan Herzog
Donations to the Rabbi's Discretionary Fund
Billing statements are emailed monthly.
Checks made out to the Pelham Jewish Center can be mailed to Pelham Jewish Center, P.O. Box 418, Montvale, NJ 07645. Credit card payment instructions are on your monthly emailed billing statement, or go to https://thepjc.shulcloud.com/payment.php.
If you are interested in paying via appreciated securities or IRA distributions, please email Mitch Cepler.
It is the policy of the Pelham Jewish Center to make every effort to assist members experiencing financial challenges. Financial challenges should never be a barrier to being an active member of the PJC community. You can reach out to President, Lisa Neubardt, Treasurer, Mitchell Cepler or Rabbi Benjamin Resnick to speak confidentially concerning your ability to pay PJC dues and Learning Center tuition.
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