Dear Friends,

There is a simple but important story told about Moshe David of Chortkov, a 19th century Hasidic rebbe. Every Simkhat Torah, during the hakafot, his custom was to choose the heaviest sefer torah that he could find and dance with it all night long. One year, as he was dancing, one of his younger followers approached him and said, “Rebbe, isn’t it too heavy for you?” He replied, “No, not at all. When you take hold of the Torah it is never heavy.”

I love this little tale. It communicates, with concision and charm, a central element of how Jews throughout history have imagined how it feels and what it is to lead a life guided by the lights of our sacred literature. Yes, we’ve had our ascetics. And we’ve had our share of gloomy preachers and prophets. But for the most part–from the Tanach to the Palmach, as the saying goes–Jews have always emphasized that Torah study is and ought to be delightful and have insisted that taking hold of Torah–bringing it fully into the fullness of our lives–makes us lighter. It is a sentiment expressed through the glorious folk tradition of teaching young children the aleph-bet by tracing the letters in honey. And it is forms the core of the blessing that we traditionally make over the act of Torah study each morning–וְהַעֲרֶב נָא ה' אֱלהֵינוּ אֶת דִּבְרֵי תורָתְךָ בְּפִינוּ וּבְפִיּות עַמְּךָ בֵּית יִשרָאֵל–May Adonai our got make the words of Torah sweet in our mouths and in the mouths of all the people Israel. It is a lovely and stirring request. It is also something we can make real in a very concrete way in the coming days.

One of the dramatic rituals of Simkhat Torah is the act of unrolling an entire sefer Torah. We do it for our children–literally, with our own hands, wrapping them up in a blanket of sacred letters–but we don’t only do it for our children. Memorable as it is, important as it is, one comment I often get (in the vein of the question from the concerned young hasid) is that it’s physically challenging to keep the parchment upright and to keep it safe. It is indeed. But the difficulty of the task is directly related to the number of hands in the room–the number of people who will come out on this Thursday night to share in the sacred task of showing our children each and every letter, and therefore declaring as one people–וְזֹ֖את הַתּוֹרָ֑ה אֲשֶׁר־שָׂ֣ם מֹשֶׁ֔ה לִפְנֵ֖י בְּנֵ֥י יִשְׂרָאֵֽל–This is the Torah that Moshe placed before the people of Israel. 

The Torah–studying it, taking hold of it, and bringing it into our lives–can indeed seem heavy. But that heaviness is an illusion, dispelled entirely in the instant that we lift Torah, and one another, together. Please join us to celebrate Simchat Torah on Thursday, October 24th at 5:30pm. 

Moadim l’simcha– 

Rabbi Benjamin Resnick 

Ben

“Speak the truth, pave the way, and give hope.”  

Or Bokobza, Israeli Tech Entrepreneur

This past September I, along with my friend Morah Ronit Razinovsky, our dedicated Bnei Mitzvah teacher, also the education director at the JCC of Harrison, had the distinct privilege of attending the IAC (Israeli American Council) Educational Track Summit 2024 in Washington, D.C. We joined over 3,000 participants from the U.S., Israel, and around the world, embarking on a transformative journey of learning, reflection, and connection. These were truly unforgettable days, filled with insights from esteemed business leaders, courageous Jewish community advocates, influential educators from both the U.S. and Israel, passionate figures in Israel advocacy, distinguished journalists, philanthropists, and many more.

Together, we stood in solidarity as we commemorated the victims and heroes of the tragic events of October 7th. We engaged in thought-provoking discussions about our collective future, relished opportunities to network, and celebrated the rich heritage that unites us all—a deep love for Israel and our shared Jewish identity.

In recent years, we have been incredibly fortunate to integrate IAC’s enriching online courses into our Bnei Mitzvah class and Teen Collab program. These programs, made possible by generous grants, have had a profound impact on our students, and we were eager to meet the people who had been instrumental in shaping their Jewish learning experiences.

Over the past year, as Jewish American Israelis, Ronit and I have faced the unique challenge of finding ways to uplift and inspire those around us, while also supporting our families back home in Israel. Attending the Summit provided us with a much-needed surge of motivation and hope, reigniting our commitment to strengthening Jewish identity and education as we look toward the future.

One of the many profound moments during the Summit was a session where we had the honor of hearing from four young individuals from Arab countries. Each of them shared their incredible journeys—stories of love for Israel and the Jewish people, despite growing up in environments filled with antisemitic indoctrination in countries like Lebanon, Yemen, Egypt, and Bahrain. A common thread emerged from their narratives: a transformational change sparked by education. Whether driven by personal curiosity or through attending universities abroad, their experiences reaffirmed the power of education as a critical tool in combating hatred and reshaping perspectives.

In another powerful session, we heard from four Israeli high-tech entrepreneurs who were called to immediate reserve duty following the events of 10/07. Each of them had to leave their professional lives and personal responsibilities behind to serve their country in a time of crisis. 

One particularly moving story came from Lital Leshem, the Managing Partner, Beyond Partner, and Founding Member of UAE-Israel Business Council. Lital, despite being six months pregnant, returned from a successful business meeting in NYC on 10/07, only to be called up for duty on that same day by her military unit. Lital, who had spent more than a decade in the IDF Intelligence Unit stationed in the Gaza Envelope, rejoined her unit against the advice of her husband and parents, serving until she gave birth three months later.

When asked by the audience what advice she had for the younger generation, Lital responded with simple yet profound wisdom: “Whatever you do, always be kind to everyone.” Her words encapsulated the essence of the Jewish value, v’ahavta l’reacha kamocha - love your neighbor as yourself—a principle that guides not only personal life but also the path to success in business and beyond.

Another unforgettable story came from Or Bokobza, a young Israeli entrepreneur who left his business, wife, and family for what he thought would be a brief two-week engagement, only to find himself serving for months. He shared the sobering moment on 10/08, just before his unit entered Kibbutz Beeri. His commander told the soldiers: “Be prepared to witness unimaginable horrors, but never forget where you come from. Our values are not the same as those who commit these atrocities. Let your integrity, not your emotions, guide you. Remember who you are and the principles that define us.”

This message—rooted in the values of Jewish education, ethics, and foundational principles—served as a powerful reminder of the moral compass that must guide us in both our personal lives and professional endeavors.

At the close of this session, a young college student asked the panelists for their message to the next generation of leaders. Or Bokobza’s response resonated deeply with the audience: “These are the principles that have guided me throughout my life and career: speak the truth, pave the way, and bring hope.”

As we embark on a new year of Jewish learning, we carry these lessons with us, hoping to inspire our students, families, and ourselves as we continue to seek meaningful opportunities for growth, connection, and Jewish pride. We aspire to nurture a deep love for Judaism and Israel, fostering an unshakable Jewish identity that will empower our students to stand up for their beliefs with courage and conviction.

May our students take pride in who they are and what they stand for. May our teachers and families continue to pave the way for future generations to grow safely, embracing their Jewish identity and values. And may we be blessed with tikvah—hope, resilience, and the strength to build upon the legacy of our ancestors, bringing light and hope to the future.

Am Yisrael Chai—The People of Israel Live!

Ana and Ronit

Ana & Ronit

“Democracy is the worst form of Government except for all those 

other forms that have been tried from time to time.”

Winston Churchill

I seem to be comparing everything to Election Day these days. Whatever I have on my list, it’s measured against whether it will happen before or after November 5th. For instance, it occurs to me that the next time I write a Hakol piece, the election will be over.

I promise that I am not looking to discuss politics here. I am recognizing that this is going to be a big event for our country in general and our personal lives in specific. The country is evenly divided, 50/50, about candidates and politics. 

Apparently, there is even such a thing as an election shopping slump.

The looming presidential election — being so close and so heated -- is wreaking havoc with people’s confidence. There are too many unknowns, too much confusion regarding the economy, inflation, high interest rates, etc., etc. Our country is on edge, and people on both sides of the aisle are reluctant to make big-ticket purchases. They want to wait until they know who will be in charge. Car dealers and real estate agents are reporting definite snags while purchases for luxury items are on pause as well. 

Also taking a big hit is the wedding industry. Couples worry that political unrest could upend travel or shut down city streets. Another significant concern is that friends and family of opposing political stripes will trade barbs and ruin the day. One wedding planner was quoted as saying, “It’s like looking at a storm system coming in,” she said, “and wondering how bad it will be.”



This seems so incongruous. A new bride and groom should have normal wedding jitters, like “did I remember to pick up my tux”, “are my crazy relatives going to embarrass me on the dance floor”, “will it be a good hair day”? Not “will my friends be delayed because of riots stemming from election results”?

Over the High Holidays I talked about disappointment. On November 5th, some of us are going to disappoint and some of us are going to be disappointed. No matter the result and no matter what side you favor, half of our country is going to be disappointed, meaning that someone you know is going to be disappointed. This is not hyperbole. It is fact. 

How to manage and prepare for this disappointment, I am not exactly sure. I have friends who are making deals with family members on different sides of the political fence. They are creating conversation no-fly zones that will take effect as of November 1st. I have other friends who are temporarily blocking certain social media connections. Personally, I am turning off anything live for that week. I am not on social media, but I do watch CNN and have NY Times breaking news updates on my phone. Starting on November 1st, that will change.

November 5th is going to be difficult and we may see divides with friends from all parts of our lives. I hope we can find a way to show up for each other and recognize that despite the stakes, with some calm and understanding, this is a life moment we can weather. Or if we really can’t, then we need to call it and create no-fly zones and boundaries to protect ourselves and these relationships. Whatever happens, I will wish for your peace, comfort and maybe even a Happy November 6th.

Lisa

Dear Friends,

There is no doubt that our community sorely misses the comforting presence of

Adam Abeshouse. Our Yom Kippur services were somber this year. The age-old Yom Kippur question, "Who shall live and who shall die?" modified by tefillah, tzedakah and chasadim tovim - was turned on its head. No one fulfilled the mitzvot of prayer, charity and kindness more than Adam. Our hearts are heavy. More than ever we each need the comfort of the PJC community to give us support and hope.

The presence of Avinoam, Havi and family provided continuity and spirituality. We were blessed by their presence. Our uplifted voices provided unity and hope. The instrumental introduction to the Kol Nidre service by Dan Perkis and his violinist and cellist was beautiful and made us think about the times when Adam's violin opened the sacred day.

Together, with the guidance of Rabbi Resnick, we will find a way forward in this difficult time. Look for the updated PJC Directory in your Rosh HaShanah goody bag. Use it to keep in touch with your fellow congregants and friends.

We need each other.

Barbara

On Her Own

by Lihi Lapid

On Her Own is an Israeli novel driven by women living with loss. The novel, a page-turner, depicts the less known, seamy side of life in Israeli cities. In Lapid's words, "... they all looked like they had collided with the dregs of life in a hit-and-run accident that had flung them here, casualties of fate walking around this ugly place she had to escape from."

Nina is a fatherless teenager of Russian ancestry under the spell of a glamorous, older man, the notorious gangster, Shmueli. Her Mom, Irina, tries to warn her but Nina doesn't listen, packs a suitcase and leaves with Shmueli before her matriculation exams. She doesn't return.

Carmela lost her older son, Uri, in one of Israel's many wars. Her husband has passed on and her other son, Itamar, lives with his wife and two children in the United States. In her loneliness and grief, Carmela has lost the ability to function normally, falling in and out of mental clarity. She longs to see her granddaughter, Dana. Itamar's wife, Naama, a former kibbutznik, loves the freedom and anonymity of living in the US. Itamar is guilt-ridden about leaving his mother but is tired of having to pay the price of being the surviving son with all the expectations that entails.

The lives of these characters intertwine in surprising ways.

Underneath the story is the question of what it means to be an Israeli, in Israel and in the diaspora.

Barbara

A Man In His Life

by Yehuda Amichai

A man in his life has no time to have

Time for everything.

He has no room to have room

For every desire. Ecclesiastes was wrong to claim that.

A man has to hate and love all at once,

With the same eyes to cry and to laugh

With the same hands to throw stones

And to gather them,

Make love in war and war in love.

And hate and forgive and remember and forget

And order and confuse and eat and digest

What long history does

In so many years.

A man in his life has no time.

When he loses he seeks

When he finds he forgets

When he forgets he loves

When he loves he begins forgetting.

And his soul is knowing

And very professional,

Only his body remains an amateur

Always. It tries and fumbles.

He doesn’t learn and gets confused,

Drunk and blind in his pleasures and pains.

In autumn, he will die like a fig,

Shriveled, sweet, full of himself.

The leaves dry out on the ground,

And the naked branches point

To the place where there is time for everything.

Women's Group 2024-2025

It has been quite a while since the Women's Group met last Spring and I hope that everyone will agree that it is better late than never.

Our first women's group meeting will take place Saturday November 2nd. We gather in the sanctuary after Kiddush.

For those who have attended over the years I will guess that, like me, you are looking forward to our monthly gathering. In fact, I can't think of a time when I have ever been more anxious to be around fellow female members of the congregation. 

When I was growing up the women got together and planned events as the Sisterhood. I thought as a teen that Sisterhood was a pretty fuddy duddy

description but have since realized that's what it really is about.

My mother, who was an immigrant from what was then Czechoslovakia and a bit self-conscious about her English language writing skills, never liked to

put herself forward. But when her turn came to become sisterhood president--it was transformational.

At the Conservative Synagogue in Riverdale where we were members, the tradition was to allow funeral services to be held in the sanctuary for past presidents, my dad included. But of course, in my mother’s era there were no female presidents.

When my mother died, Rabbi Katz called me and my sister and said Sisterhood Presidency was the highest office for women at the time and so we were able to hold my mom’s service at the schul.

For anyone who has not attended Women’s Group in the past, let me describe the hour we spend together once a month. We start with introductions and then anyone who wants to can talk for a few moments about the month preceding in their life. Next, a volunteer from the group gives a 10-15 minute prepared presentation. The content of the presentation is varied. It can be related to the Torah portion or not. Past presentations have run the gamut from Jewish humor to what Jewish law tells us about caring for pets, to what I wore to my Bat Mitzvah, to a particular take from a woman's perspective on the parshah. The presentation is followed by a half hour discussion.

After 20 years of membership at PJC, it is still my favorite gathering.

To get started, we need volunteers to cover presentations from November through May. June will be a potluck on a Sunday at someone's home.

As soon as December through May dates are finalized, I will send out a schedule.

Shanah Tovah!

Melanie

"Share a Simcha" allows congregants to share their news with our PJC community. Please submit news about family members -- engagements, births, job updates, kid achievements, community acknowledgements and any other milestones -- to the HaKol Editor, Barbara Saunders-Adams.

. Mazal Tov to our October Birthday Celebrants:

David Katz, Marcello Nacht, Callie Novick, Seth Goldman, Seth Lieberman,

Jacob Owen Michaane, Rena Ilkowitz, Saul Backer, Daniel Rubock, Mitchell Cepler, Greg Breskin, Andrea Prigot, Julia Glickman, Dylan Fleischer, Julia Martin,

Max Lee, Daniel Cabin, Emma Almo, Sara Almo, Rachel Lief, Mark Singer,

Adam Gerber, Heather Geller, Michael Dvorkin, Lynn Dvorkin, Zach Fallberg, Jessica Morgan, Aidan Zusin, Heather Schneider

A belated Mazal Tov to David Eliezer and Heather Glickman on the B'nei Mitzvot of their children Dov & Rosalia.

Share a Simcha is a regular HaKol feature, so keep your news and updates coming!

Tributes

. David and Jeanne Radvany in honor of the marriage of Emily Abeshouse

. David and Jeanne Radvany in memory of Bernie Steinberg

. Judy Shampanier & Michael Bowen in memory of Adam Abeshouse

. Dan Mailick & Lydia Read in memory of Adam Abeshouse

. Joel & Beth Serebransky in memory of Adam Abeshouse

. Martin Dvorkin in honor of Michelle and Michael Dvorkin

Donations to the Rabbi's Discretionary Fund

Billing statements are emailed monthly. 

Checks made out to the Pelham Jewish Center can be mailed to Pelham Jewish Center, P.O. Box 418, Montvale, NJ 07645. Credit card payment instructions are on your monthly emailed billing statement, or go to https://thepjc.shulcloud.com/payment.php. 

If you are interested in paying via appreciated securities or IRA distributions, please email Mitch Cepler.

It is the policy of the Pelham Jewish Center to make every effort to assist members experiencing financial challenges. Financial challenges should never be a barrier to being an active member of the PJC community. You can reach out to President, Lisa Neubardt, Treasurer, Mitchell Cepler or Rabbi Benjamin Resnick to speak confidentially concerning your ability to pay PJC dues and Learning Center tuition.